Music

[Laurie919]

I believe that Satan uses music to get a foot hold into peoples lives.

With this said what type of music do you allow your tweens to listen to?

Taylor use to like Zoey Girl and "pop" Christian music. Now that she is in public school and around kids that are allowed to read, watch and listen to things that we use to not, she wants to be like everyone else.

I know I know I know I know just because everyone else is doing it isn't a reason to do it. I do worry about sheltering them so much that they rebel.

It isn't all so bad, but it doesn't glorify God and I don't like that.

Do you allow your children to listen to pop music or do you keep them sheltered.

 

[coffeegal]

my kids do listen to some pop type music, but stuff dan and i listened to- not that that was much better. but they are not into non christian type music.

 

[Tea]

We keep the house as a "sacturary" that is free of "worldy" music, books, movies, etc.
If they want to see and listen to these things then they can see them everywhere they go, but they will not be brought into the home.
Music that is brought into the home must have words that are edifying, and the music it's self must not be stressful.
Just because music is labled "Christian" does not always mean it is edifying either.
Just us,
Tracey

 

[lucypevensie]

Our kids like pop music. We do not ban non-Christian music in general. See, I don't think that music has to have some kind of Christian message in it in order to be worthy of my listening enjoyment. I don't have that standard with books or TV or movies, so why music?

That said, I still use discretion and encourage them to use discretion as well. Recently my 10 year old wanted to download the song Fergalicious on her ipod. Instead of freaking and leacturing on how ungodly that song is we sat and talked about the words and the pictures that go along with the video. I said I wasn't going to allow her to download that song, but by then she was OK with that because she understood why and she agreed with me.

 

[CelticRose]

My 12yr old is allowed the classical station & the Christian station. There has never been an issue with music. However we do homeschool so we don't get the same peer pressure that your Taylor does.

 

[£amb]

My son, actually both of them, are showing an interest in alternative music. We are able to download music onto my computer, but he knows that anything he downloads has to run by me first. I like to look at the lyrics first to get a general gist of what he's listening too. Sometimes we'll both sit there and read the lyrics, and I'll ask him is this a type of song he wants. Most of the songs he'll say no too because of language or the meaning behind the song. I know at his age I was listening to music my parents wouldn't of approve of, but I was raised to be level-headed enough to not let the music "influence" me. There are many great secular songs out there that I don't mind my boys listening too, and I'm okay with that.

 

[ShannonMcCatholic]

I like all kinds of different music--and I totally hope my kids will grow up liking all kinds of different music. A lot of popular Christian music is just awful....it is really kinda unlistenably bad, to me. I do listen to some Christian bands..but the are most punk bands.

I have no hard and fast rule- we'll just take it all one music artist, one record, at a time.

I dunno right now my kids are just as likely to ask for me to put on Wagner as they are to put on Mika or Hannah Montana.

 

[Laurie919]

My 12yr old is allowed the classical station & the Christian station. There has never been an issue with music. However we do homeschool so we don't get the same peer pressure that your Taylor does.

You are very lucky that you don't have to deal with the peer pressure. It is much worse than when we were kids.

The Naked Brothers Band is really just blowing me out the water. Some of there stuff is really negetive.

 

[moonkitty]

....

I have no hard and fast rule- we'll just take it all one music artist, one record, at a time.

...

That's pretty much how things are at my house.

My children listen to everything from old fashion ballads to classical to rock and roll.

 

[JulySheMustFly]

Our kids like pop music. We do not ban non-Christian music in general. See, I don't think that music has to have some kind of Christian message in it in order to be worthy of my listening enjoyment. I don't have that standard with books or TV or movies, so why music?

That said, I still use discretion and encourage them to use discretion as well. Recently my 10 year old wanted to download the song Fergalicious on her ipod. Instead of freaking and leacturing on how ungodly that song is we sat and talked about the words and the pictures that go along with the video. I said I wasn't going to allow her to download that song, but by then she was OK with that because she understood why and she agreed with me.

That is the standard I'd like to have in our house.

 

[Robinsegg]

Why don't you consume these things together, so you can give her your perspective on them, and why you see them as unwise choices for her? I may have my people mixed up here, but didn't you say she's very mature for her age? If so, you should be able to discuss this with her (after such and experience as above) and give her your instructions.

Rachel

 

[Laurie919]

Why don't you consume these things together, so you can give her your perspective on them, and why you see them as unwise choices for her? I may have my people mixed up here, but didn't you say she's very mature for her age? If so, you should be able to discuss this with her (after such and experience as above) and give her your instructions.

Rachel

We are talking about these things. We have had BIG talks this weekend from dressing to playing with the boys.

 

[CelticRose]

You are very lucky that you don't have to deal with the peer pressure. It is much worse than when we were kids.

The Naked Brothers Band is really just blowing me out the water. Some of there stuff is really negetive.

I have no idea who these people are. I tend to go for obscure & unusual things (thus my poor children are exposed to out~of~the~box musical experiences). What strikes me is that if Taylor is the trendsetter you say she is, why not encourage her to find a different sort of music that she likes & set a trend amongst her peers for African tribal music, or medieval love songs, plain chant or even jazz or swing. Finding that interesting something is something you could do together. I may have misunderstood but it sounds more like Taylor is following the crowd than setting the trends & that, personally would worry the living daylights out of me.

 

[jgonz]

The Naked Brothers Band is a pop band that is primarily on the Disney Channel & Nickelodeon.

We don't ban non-Christian music in our house... especially since Some Christian music (especially hard-core metal rock or scream-bands) is, IMO, worse than non-Christian music.

We stress listening to the music and seeing how it affects each person. The lyrics may be fine, but the music itself takes someone to a dark place... or vice versa. Just like some people can't handle Country music (for example) because it takes them down into depression, while other people have no problem with it at all. DH & I are still careful and monitor the teenagers' types of music though... Just recently I walked in and found my 14 yr old listening to symphony orchestra music while he was doing his school work! He said it helped him think! I was totally excited about that one... lol

 

[Laurie919]

I have no idea who these people are. I tend to go for obscure & unusual things (thus my poor children are exposed to out~of~the~box musical experiences). What strikes me is that if Taylor is the trendsetter you say she is, why not encourage her to find a different sort of music that she likes & set a trend amongst her peers for African tribal music, or medieval love songs, plain chant or even jazz or swing. Finding that interesting something is something you could do together. I may have misunderstood but it sounds more like Taylor is following the crowd than setting the trends & that, personally would worry the living daylights out of me.

I am working on changing music taste. She just believes she should listen to music I am not sure I am approving of. It is something I have to work on.

We did have several good talks this weekend. So, I think we are going to be working on making some very big changes at our house.

 

[Robinsegg]

I am working on changing music taste. She just believes she should listen to music I am not sure I am approving of. It is something I have to work on.

We did have several good talks this weekend. So, I think we are going to be working on making some very big changes at our house.

Wonderful! Tweens can be a difficult age (not that I have one, but my siblings are considerably younger than I, so I saw it with them). The balance between giving them freedom and still having control can be a delicate balance . . . . but it sounds like you're going in the right direction!
Help her to understand that the choices you make are based upon your love and care for her well-being . . . not just arbitrary rules. Help her to understand that the rules you make may be up for discussion (if that's your style), but your decision after that discussion is final. That way, she can feel heard, but you still make the end determination. I want to encourage you, not give you instructions . . . so if it comes off wrong, please forgive me and disregard. If you pm me with an objection, I'll edit this portion out.

Rachel

 

[heart of peace]

I enjoy listening to secular music and I like to spend time with my son doing things that we both enjoy. So we listen to secular music often.

I don't really see pop culture as a tool of Satan as I am an involved parent actively filtering pop culture for my child.

 

[Birbitt]

There is no one rule in our house for this....how we respond to choices in music is really based on how the children respond to the music. (now our children are young but hubby and I have already made decisions on how to address this later) For example if my child can listen to the music and leave it at that fine...but if he starts acting out the music, or using language that is inappropriate because of the music then something has to change...and any music that we feel is "too yucky" will just not be allowed.

 

[CelticRose]

There is no one rule in our house for this....how we respond to choices in music is really based on how the children respond to the music. (now our children are young but hubby and I have already made decisions on how to address this later) For example if my child can listen to the music and leave it at that fine...but if he starts acting out the music, or using language that is inappropriate because of the music then something has to change...and any music that we feel is "too yucky" will just not be allowed.

That's pretty much how it's ended up in our house simply because I have older kids who are now legally adults but the 12 yr old is limited to what she can listen to unsupervised ~ the Christian station or the classical. Supervised widens the agenda & it widens again with choir & band; some of the choir choices are questionable but can then be discussed. I don't find my kids' tastes particularly mature or broad but only my youngest has ever been very interested in music & she is still young enough to be developing.

 

[Laurie919]

Wonderful! Tweens can be a difficult age (not that I have one, but my siblings are considerably younger than I, so I saw it with them). The balance between giving them freedom and still having control can be a delicate balance . . . . but it sounds like you're going in the right direction!
Help her to understand that the choices you make are based upon your love and care for her well-being . . . not just arbitrary rules. Help her to understand that the rules you make may be up for discussion (if that's your style), but your decision after that discussion is final. That way, she can feel heard, but you still make the end determination. I want to encourage you, not give you instructions . . . so if it comes off wrong, please forgive me and disregard. If you pm me with an objection, I'll edit this portion out.

Rachel

Everything is fine....

We just had another talk and I did tell her we will talk about songs, read them and as long as they don't have anything about sex, drugs, or cursing I won't object to them.

So, then I thought this was a good time to bring up the s word. So, I said do you know what that word means? She looked at me sort of strange and said I don't think so not really. Then she said but do we have to have this talk now? It was cute. I said we can wait until school it out, k? So that is our deal. We are having the talk when school gets out in a couple weeks.