I was so blessed. Valedictorian of my high school. Full academic scholarship to college. High undergrad GPA until senior year happened. Out of the blue depression and anxiety. It has been a struggle ever since. I was able to graduate since my problems were only moderate but things became much worse when I went to my medical school. My depression and anxiety became so severe that I barely left my house for 2.5 years(2011-2013). By God's grace I was able to get my MDD under control with transcranial magnetic stimulation. However, I still have severe anxiety and cognitive problems. I can't focus. My memory is horrible. I'm 29 years old and I think the best part of my life is over. I have exhausted every treatment option available with no success. I see no future for me. No job. No wife. No kids. I'm literally praying to God to heal me or end my life. I just don't want to tread water for the rest of my life. It's sink or swim time. I won't kill myself because the Bible is clear about that. I just need God to heal me.