Mating for Life?

[Ampmonster]

so whats the feeling that tells you right or wrong...cmon?

 

[Mylinkay Asdara]

Right and wrong... it's tough because situational ethics is something people generally sneer at, but in actuality that seems to be all there is.
White lies- telling someone that you have no intention of making a surprise birthday party for them or that you know nothing about one when that's not the case- not wrong not right- neutral.
Lies- hurtful-wrong hurtful in long term-wrong not hurtful/doesn't affect person-not wrong not right- neutral
Basically anything that harms another is wrong and anything that doesn't is not wrong or right but neutral and anything that benifits another without harming someone in the process is right.

That's just a main/basic outlook for me, but it's served me well in understanding. Intent is a huge factor in right and wrong as well. What did the person doing the act that is to be judged intent when it was done?

 

[Havoc]

you don't believe in sin?
are you perfect? im not trying to sound like a jerk, but sin (or whatever term you have for it) is human nuture.

Correction:
You believe sin is human nature. Sin is a very specific descriptor. Sin is doing something contrary to the will of the Abramic God. If your God does not exist then sin does not exist. I have no reason to believe that your God exists.

The Pagan concepts of "right and wrong" are radically different from your concept of Sin. To us there is no infection of sin, no fallen nature, no Overlord to placate. Actions may be harmful or not depending on the circumstances. Murder is practically always harmful. Sex may or may not be depending on the circumstances. Rebellion against authority may be harmful if the authority is just and fair, but may be the entirely correct thing if the authority is corrupt and oppressive (a'la the American revolution). In your system a Sin is a Sin is a Sin.

So the short answer is no, we don't believe in Sin.

 

[Ampmonster]

right and wrong...im clear on the definitions. gotcha.
im asking what are the feelings that lead to one doing something "wrong"
hints:
greed, hate, lust, pride, etc etc

 

[Mylinkay Asdara]

Usually selfishness can be traced as the root of people doing wrong in my experiance. But such a feeling is not a 'sin' it is simply a sign of an unenlightened soul. Once born are prone to this feeling, but no one is totally immune until one achieves total Oneness (which, trust me, is pretty far off for many of us and will take much living and learning and loving to achieve)

 

[Ampmonster]

"pride"
you ever lie to make yourself sound better? i have!
" hate"
hate someone because they hurt you, or your afraid they will? *raises hand*
"lust"
this one less poeple do, but having sex with someone you dont at least love can be very damaging, emotionally.

i kinda envy the animals in this regard. they dont have any of these problems.
our free will is our sin. animals are like programed, almost.

 

[LovingMother]

Refferring specifically to the topic "Mating for Life" - a long term human relationship requires more that simple mating. If you view a relationship as little more than sex and the pleasure of each individual, then it's likely to wear thin before long. Marriage is much more than mating.

 

[MoonlessNight]

"pride"
you ever lie to make yourself sound better? i have!
" hate"
hate someone because they hurt you, or your afraid they will? *raises hand*
"lust"
this one less poeple do, but having sex with someone you dont at least love can be very damaging, emotionally.

i kinda envy the animals in this regard. they dont have any of these problems.
our free will is our sin. animals are like programed, almost.

You know, I can't accept that animals are some kind of programmed drones, while we humans hold consciousness for ourselves. I wish I had some proofs but I do not, and philosophers haven't really paid much attention to the issue. So I guess it's just something I'm forced to take on faith.

Which is downright bizzare considering I'm an agnostic (though, perhaps not a very good one).

 

[Mylinkay Asdara]

Refferring specifically to the topic "Mating for Life" - a long term human relationship requires more that simple mating. If you view a relationship as little more than sex and the pleasure of each individual, then it's likely to wear thin before long. Marriage is much more than mating.

Well, I must say that it would have to be. But when I say Mate is it only because I do not believe we are as elevated above our fellow mammals as we would sometimes like to believe. I still consider myself a creature in nature and therefore whatever fancy name I wish to give it my urge to find someone with which to procreate is in fact the urge to mate. It's not about the infered sexual pleasure or anything so fleeting- it's about coming together to create and rear young.

 

[LovingMother]

Well, I must say that it would have to be. But when I say Mate is it only because I do not believe we are as elevated above our fellow mammals as we would sometimes like to believe. I still consider myself a creature in nature and therefore whatever fancy name I wish to give it my urge to find someone with which to procreate is in fact the urge to mate. It's not about the infered sexual pleasure or anything so fleeting- it's about coming together to create and rear young.

First, I am a Christian, so I believe that God did place us above the animals. Even still, most animals do not stay with their parents until they are adults. Most animals are capable of living and surviving very well on their own while still quite young, whereas human children do not have this same ability. My three year old son would not thrive, even if he did survive, if I were to let him loose now. So, if you were to expect two people to come together to create and rear young, then it would have to be a long-term union. To me, though, there is still more to a realtionshiip than even procreation. The security of always having somebody there for you and to be there for until you are separated by death is very rewarding, among other benefits of a marriage for life.

 

[Mylinkay Asdara]

I suppose it would be rewarding. Of course, if you shifted mates I don't see why you couldn't still have someone to be 'there for you' and your children that are being reared. Personally I think communities should help raise all the children in them, but that's another thread I suppose.

 

[Ampmonster]

"Personally I think communities should help raise all the children in them, but that's another thread I suppose."
***
that has ben the role of family since the dawn of man. leaning towards social child rearing is disasterous.

 

[Mylinkay Asdara]

I just mean that neighbors and family of the extended nature should help out. People take everything said in these threads to the extreme sometimes!

 

[Havoc]

Refferring specifically to the topic "Mating for Life" - a long term human relationship requires more that simple mating. If you view a relationship as little more than sex and the pleasure of each individual, then it's likely to wear thin before long. Marriage is much more than mating.

I agree, but that doesn't mean it has to be the way your religion defines it. Marriage comes in many forms in many societies. It doesn't have to be for life, it's nice when that happens, but if it does happen it should be because it's nice, not because of a religious edict.

 

[LovingMother]

Christians are supposed to help each other and in many communities they do, but it is still the responsibility of the family to rear the children. I'm curious, though, how does shifting mates work in your mind? Do you have sex and then move on? Do you expect the father (ie, the man who conceived the child) to help you raise the child as a family, or would you be prepared to raise the child on your own? If the father did stick around, helped you in your pregnancy and supported the child, when another man comes along would you just leave the father of your child out in the cold to search for another mate? What if he did all of that and another woman came along that he wanted to be with; would it be ok for him to leave you and your child to go procreate some more?

 

[Havoc]

I'm sorry, was your post directed at me LM? If so you're asking the wrong gender. I'm male.

 

[LovingMother]

I agree, but that doesn't mean it has to be the way your religion defines it. Marriage comes in many forms in many societies. It doesn't have to be for life, it's nice when that happens, but if it does happen it should be because it's nice, not because of a religious edict.

My religion is my foundation and my guide for my life. I don't expect a Christian to marry somebody they didn't want to spend the rest of their life with. If I wasn't prepared to spend the rest of my life with my husband, I wouldn't have married him. My point was that it's more than simple sex or even procreation.

 

[Mylinkay Asdara]

Well, switching mates would be a matter of changing partners: Example- I was with my previous boyfriend for a year and seven months. I mingled amonst his friends and we had sex (he and I) there were no children because we practiced safe sex. We still loved eachother at the end of our relationship, and we still love eachother now (we are still friends and very close) but both of us needed something else in our life because our lives were changing.
We broke up. We found other people and we are now with them. Still, one day we may get back together and share another happy year or two.

With children it is more complicated, but you could just have former and present mates live with you in the same home and that would solve the issue of who's around for the kids.

 

[LovingMother]

I'm sorry, was your post directed at me LM? If so you're asking the wrong gender. I'm male.

Sorry, I should have quoted. No, I was continuing my conversation with Mylinkay Asdara. I am curious about her views on the matter, though I would be intersted to hear it from the male side as well.

 

[Ampmonster]

well animals mate too make little animals