Masturbation (right or wrong?)

[Christian Love]

In our Christian walk with God, do you think that masturbation is right or worng?

And, to get a little bit more graphic specifically for the couples, do you think it is right or wrong for you to 'masturbation' your mate (if you know what I mean) without having sexual intercourse.

 

[fluffy_rainbow]

I have a difficult time answering with a solid yes or no. Personally, I have felt conviction in this area, so I strive to remain completely chaste until marriage. Spiritual implications aside, I have to wonder if pre-marital masturbation on a regular basis doesn't hamper sexual desires when one does marry. How can you properly gain satisfaction from your spouse if you're solely used to pleasuring yourself for many years?

 

[PurpleBunny]

In our Christian walk with God, do you think that masturbation is right or worng?

And, to get a little bit more graphic specifically for the couples, do you think it is right or wrong for you to 'masturbation' your mate (if you know what I mean) without having sexual intercourse.

I am sort of divided on the issue of masturbation. It's something I struggle with, but I think the fact that it is motivated by lust and impure thoughts (ie sin) is a pretty clear signal on whether it's right or wrong. It is possible to desire someone without lusting after them.

As for manually stimulating one's spouse without continuing to intercourse--that's fine, especially if one person is unable to have sex for some reason (ie bed rest during pregnancy, recovering from pregnancy, other medical problem). Fact is it can be very intimate. However, it's something that should be reserved for marriage--heavy petting & manual stimulation of one's partner is a huge step towards premarital sex and, mentally, you ARE having sex with your partner, which is spoken against rather strongly in the Bible.

 

[Christian Love]

I am not sure I understand how you can say that masturbation is absolutely wrong if you are doing it to yourself, but it maybe ok if you are doing it with your partner. Could you explain a little more. Because I would think that if masturbation is wrong then it is wrong across the board. But, that is just my humble opinion.

 

[PJSmile]

I strongly believe that masturbation is wrong and prohibited by God (Sin!). However, as a human being, it doesn't mean that one doesn't struggle with it. (Including me.)

Masturbation of with your significant other before marriage is also wrong. It leads to impure thoughts and increases the risk of going even further before marriage (ie... Sex). Why tempt fate?

It's not easy, but, if you can remain pure for your partner before marriage you'll both be better off in marriage. One of our pastors shared on this topic of purity before marriage. He was engaged for 4 years and remained pure with his fiance (now wife). Well, when she became pregnant with their 1st child she had major complications and they were unable to have ANY kind of sexual contact which could lead to loss of the baby. By remaining pure to each other through the engagement, they were able to make it through the 7 months of no sexual contact. God then blessed them two beautiful baby girls (yes, Twins). They now have four more children for a total of 6 kids.

 

[AngelusSax]

I believe that masturbation itself is not wrong... though the thoughts that nearly undoubtedly must accompany them are. Of course, if you're married and away on a trip and can't be with your spouse, and youhave thoughts only for him/her, then I don't see the problem.... Unless one is not to lust after their own spouse and sex itself is sin no matter what... Which, since God told humans to go forth and multiply, I don't think it is.

 

[eyeliv4God]

Mutual masturbation = fondling, so I agree with Blue Impulse on this one... I'm not really sure if masturbation is wrong other than that.

 

[Glorianna]

In our Christian walk with God, do you think that masturbation is right or worng?

And, to get a little bit more graphic specifically for the couples, do you think it is right or wrong for you to 'masturbation' your mate (if you know what I mean) without having sexual intercourse.

Interestingly enough, he thinks it's okay and I think it's wrong NO MATTER WHAT.

Spiritual implications aside, I have to wonder if pre-marital masturbation on a regular basis doesn't hamper sexual desires when one does marry. How can you properly gain satisfaction from your spouse if you're solely used to pleasuring yourself for many years?

I've also wondered about this.

I have never had the desire to touch. My fiance and a lot of other people are amazed by that but I've just never really cared. It's never been a big deal to me.

 

[Emma!]

This is the response that i posted to someone else who asked:



Masturbation clearly sows to the flesh and its desires. God commands his followers to sow to the Spirit's desires and not our flesh's desires.

Galatians 6:8
"For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life."


Galatians 5:19-26
"Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God." 22"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. And those who are Christ's have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another."



Galatians 5:16 (NIV)
"So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature."

another translation
(NKJV)
"I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh."
Some other verses that also bring light on this are:



Romans 6
"Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body, that you should obey it in its lusts."



John 3:6
"That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit."





Jer 17:5
Thus says the LORD: "Cursed is the man who trusts in man And makes flesh his strength, Whose heart departs from the LORD.

Ecc 11:10
"Therefore remove sorrow from your heart, And put away evil from your flesh, For childhood and youth are vanity."



There are SOOO many verses for this type of topic!!!

Basically masturbation can rob you of many of the blessings God has planned for your life. If you are a Christian, you have an obligation, not to live focused on fulfilling your fleshly lusts, but rather, to live focused on fulfilling the desires of the Holy Spirit (Romans 8:12-13). Masturbation poses the threat of lifelong bondage and a handicapped spiritual walk. Jesus was resurrected so that you also could live in a new life, free from the slavery of sin.

God created sexuality in order to be enjoyed only between two heterosexual, married spouses. Since masturbation only involves one person, it is an abuse of this gift of God. Genesis 2:18 describes how God created sex to overcome man's aloneness. Thus, sex was meant for two people. Thus, masturbation goes against God's purpose for sexuality.

They are just SOME reasons....im sure there are many more! Oh and of course lust, and can lead to other sinful things such as porn...and far, far worse.


In everything look at the fruits of it too, what comes from touching yourself.....usually addiction, lust, unhealthy expectations in marriage, selfishness, leads to other sins.....focus (esp. if addicted) not on God but on the act. etc etc etc

Dont be decieved, keep this special gift a special thing between you and your husband (or husband to be), i cant tell you how special it is when kept pure.

Its not so special if you have experienced 'it' all before and with yourself....how is that special?? Dont you want those 'special highs' to be something that are ONLY experienced between you and your husband....together??? Thats what makes it so special!!

Also if you are talking about touching yourself between an unmarried couple, that is still SEXUAL sin!! It is still a type of sex. Thefore it is wrong outside of marriage.

 

[Rosa Mystica]

Objectively speaking, masturbation is wrong for everyone, not just Christians.

 

[Lbiagm]

I am divided also.

 

[Glorianna]

I am divided also.

It's tough because the Bible never clearly speaks out against it.

 

[FaithfulServant]

I have never had the desire to touch. My fiance and a lot of other people are amazed by that but I've just never really cared. It's never been a big deal to me.

I feel the same way. It's never ever crossed my mind and never been a passion I've felt that I needed to do...and it amazes me how it can take control of some people.

 

[bliz]

I do not believe that mastrubation is an inhenrntly sinful action. It can be, but it does not have to be.

Gluttony is a sin... but eating a meal is not. Where's the line? The line is in the head of the eater. (BTW - gluttony includes an over fastidiouslness with or over attention to food as well.) Mastrubation is the same way - it can be an ocassional sexual release or it can be a terrible additction.

As soon as another person is involved in any way, we are no longer talking about mastrubation. If the couple is married - fine. If they are not, they are clearly out of bounds and their actions are sinful.

I think that the notion that mastrubation is inherently sinful and the overemphisis that has been placed on it has created needless guilt and pain.

 

[Glorianna]

I am just really uncomfortable with the whole idea of masturbation. The thought that my fiance does it makes me sick. How could something that makes me feel so awful not be a sin?

 

[AngelusSax]

How could something that makes me feel so awful not be a sin?

I feel awful when I am near a brussels sprout.... Doesn't mean eating one is a sin.

If it makes you feel awful, then don't do it. But just "feeling awful" isn't a tell-tale sin sign all the time

 

[Glorianna]

I feel awful when I am near a brussels sprout.... Doesn't mean eating one is a sin.

If it makes you feel awful, then don't do it. But just "feeling awful" isn't a tell-tale sin sign all the time

I'm not so sure that I agree with that. You know how your conscience kicks in about things that are wrong? That's what this feels like.

 

[Glorianna]

I don't know. I would be so uncomfortable if my husband did it. I know that my fiance does it and it kills me quite literally. I would feel even worse if we were married.

 

[DaveKerwin]

Here is my rule: When not married, sex organs are off limits, for any length of time, in any type of way. If you are not married to the person, do not touch their genitals, period. This was a difficult rule to follow, and at times was not followed very well, but I needed that guideline to keep myself in check.


For a read on masturbation, see this thread, particularly the first page of it:
http://www.christianforums.com/t46636-masturbation-reference-thread.html

 

[FaithfulServant]

I don't know. I would be so uncomfortable if my husband did it. I know that my fiance does it and it kills me quite literally. I would feel even worse if we were married.

If he does it now, he is not just going to stop once you two are married Just because you are "satisfying him" doesn't mean he won't....it is much more psychological than that. It is something a man has to overcome, and let the Lord fight the battle.

Pre-marital counsleing about this would be very helpful.

God Bless ,

Steffani