Masturbation as a sin

[salt-n-light]

I had to add to the part explaining James 1

As I understand James he says first we are temped - by lustful thoughts, then we are enticed - we take the bait, and when lust has conceived - when we are taken as prisoner under our lust, then it gives birth to sin - we indulge in the sin ... when sin is accomplished - the deed leads to death.

I guess the part that people hate to face usually is that beginning part, that we are capable of having those thought, that we have temptations.That we have weaknesses. It threatens our desire of being the ideal person, and it’s not a favorable light to see ourselves.

 

[zoidar]

I guess the part that people hate to face usually is that we have temptations.That we have weaknesses. It threatens our desire of being the ideal person, and it’s not a favorable light to see ourselves.

It's good to remember that even Jesus was tempted.

 

[salt-n-light]

It's good to remember that even Jesus was tempted.

A lot of times I forget

 

[zoidar]

A lot of times I forget

Thanks for the conversation! It has given me a few things to think about.

 

[salt-n-light]

Thanks for the conversation! It has given me a few things to think about.

Likewise! I have a few things to think about as well!

 

[Kaon]

It's a tough one for us old sinners but, after reading through the Bible a few times from what I can see it only says that any type of sex is okay with our wives.

Her playing with that thing versus you playing with that thing are (two different things.)

M-Bob

This. A mature way to put it, for a mature audience.

 

[zoidar]

It's a tough one for us old sinners but, after reading through the Bible a few times from what I can see it only says that any type of sex is okay with our wives.

Her playing with that thing versus you playing with that thing are (two different things.)

M-Bob

This. A mature way to put it, for a mature audience.

Of course even sex with our wife can be sinful. Each one must test themself what is sinful and not.

 

[Kaon]

Of course even sex with our wife can be sinful. Each one must test themself what is sinful and not.

Could you give some examples of how sex with your mate can be a sin?

Are you talking about spousal rape?

 

[☦Marius☦]

For some people monastery may be a solution. But most of us aren't fit for that kind of living. There were no monasteries at the time of the apostles. I believe they overcame sexual immorality pretty well. So of course we can too, through the Holy Spirit.

Before monastacism people like John the Baptist just lived out in the desert as solitary anchorites. Either way the apostles didn't have to deal with the easily accessible internet.

 

[Chinchilla]

I'm an adult in my mid 20's, I know I'm not the most mature person in the world but I've been struggling with this a lot lately. I'm not addicted to masturbation but I feel like I can't avoid doing it every once in a while, and I think the reason it bothers me so much is because I can't be 100% sure whether it's a sin or not.
If I don't touch like once a week I get too overwhelmed by stress from my everyday life. But if I do touch, I fear that I may be going against God. I know the second is more important but even so it's not easy to control it.
The thing is, I've researched as much as I could but I can't find any scripture that I think is absolutely about this. I've seen Christians quote that part where Jesus talks about "looking at a woman with lust". Or the Onan story. Or some quotes from Paul about how the body is the temple of Christ and self control.
I asked a priest and he told me masturbation IS a sin. But I've also seen Christians on the Internet saying masturbation is the lesser of two evils if it means it can be a release that stops you from commiting a worse sin (like fornication?). Doctors regardless of religion seem to say it's healthy and that it's okay as long as it's not addictive.

So I have a bunch of questions about this subject:

• What scriptures are the most clear about masturbation being a sin (if it is)?
• What did Jesus mean when he said that about looking at a woman with lust? I mean it's quite impossible to never absolutely ever get turned on by someone (unwillingly).
• What is the healthiest alternative to masturbation? I mean I try to distract myself, pray, read the scriptures. But I still get stressed out and weak eventually.
• If it's a sin, why is it a sin? I've been told at some point that a sin is something that means you are not loving someone else (and that you love or unlove God by your actions towards other people). Who isn't loved when you touch? I'm currently single but I would obviously put my partner in the first place if I were with one. If it's offensive to God then why exactly would He pick something as arbitrary and specific as this? I know pornography can come into play but do porn performers feel unloved if someone masturbates to them?
  
• If it's a sin, how bad as a sin is it? Or are all sins equal? I've learned at some point that some sins are mortal, others aren't.
• Do average Christians touch? Or are they being honest when many of them imply or claim they don't?

I think a reason this bothers me so much was that even though I hardly ever masturbated before becoming a Christian, I wasn't worried back then about whether it was a sin or not, it was just a mundane action. But now I can't help bringing God into the equation and only thinking about how MAYBE I lose His love or friendship, but only after doing it.
I'm also worried that this may be something many people must struggle with. But I get the impression that most Christians on the Internet that speak against it sound like they never touch and I feel more alienated from them that way since it just seems unnatural to be able to avoid it unless they are asexual.
I live surrounded by Christians but I'm sure most of them at least have premarital sex. I currently don't and I know I can't judge others but I struggle with accepting that every Christian has their own idea of what's right and wrong. I know that common sense could help understanding if something is a sin, and that knowing if you can "do it in the name of God" or "for the Grace of God" can also help, but neither of these apply directly to masturbation. Common sense tells me masturbation is at least healthy (doctors say it) and the other part is just too vague. I know people as friends don't mind if their friends touch in private and Jesus refers to Himself as a friend who just asks us to love each other.

Thanks a lot in advance for any answers!!
God bless.

All sins are common to man , if you think about it every man fap

The thing is people would marry young age and have sex but we went towards hunting money and carieer so we delay mariage exchanging it for money and fornication. Women would be ready to marry when they reached thier first period . God did not create man to get degrees and finish school but to have dominion over earth and animals , Biblical mariage was planned and husband would take wife into his room added for that exact purpose in his house .

Releasing seed is not sin in itself but more likelly watching porn and lust thougs . Your body will automatically release itself when you sleep if you do not have sex for about 2-3 weeks .

Also the sin of Onan was that he did not fullfill his obligations , if brother's wife had no child and his brother died , he was supposed to impregnate her and take her as wife so her child would inherit all land because only son could inherit father's goods it could not be daughter (untill one Guy asked for permission for his daughter to inherit long after ).

So Onan was not punished with death by God for spilling seed on ground but for taking Wife with all these goods . He was greedy and wanted to keep land for himself .


Back to topic .
If something glorify God then it is not sin . If it does not glorify God it is probably sin.
Fapping is sin . But it is as bad as hating somebody or even cursing .You just feel like it's worst sin than saying a lie or something like that because when you release yourself you lose dopamine .
For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.
Telling a lie is as bad as murder in God's eyes .
We sin multiple times a day that's why we need to be saved .

Get wife problem solved
If not try to not watch porn and don't leave hands on your pants because you can be touching yourself not even realising it untill it's too late and you are in "lust mode " .
Same goes for girls they often touch thier breasts while watching tv or something .

 

[zoidar]

Could you give some examples of how sex with your mate can be a sin?

Are you talking about spousal rape?

Things that involve dominating the other and things like urolagnia are sinful.

 

[JackRT]

And even the Biblical word "seed" is incorrect since in those days they believed that a man's sperm contained an entire nascent human being and that the mother's role was as a warm nurturing incubator for that "seed". It was not until the development of the microscope a few centuries ago that we realized that men produced sperm and women produced an egg and that the union of the two resulted in a zygote. It is at this point that we have a "seed" or potential human being.

 

[zoidar]

All sins are common to man , if you think about it every man fap

Really?

Back to topic .
If something glorify God then it is not sin . If it does not glorify God it is probably sin.
Fapping is sin . But it is as bad as hating somebody or even cursing .You just feel like it's worst sin than saying a lie or something like that because when you release yourself you lose dopamine .
For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.
Telling a lie is as bad as murder in God's eyes .
We sin multiple times a day that's why we need to be saved .

If it's a sin you shouldn't do it. There is no excuse for sin.

4 Everyone who practices sin also practices lawlessness; and sin is lawlessness. 5 You know that He appeared in order to take away sins; and in Him there is no sin. 6 No one who abides in Him sins; no one who sins has seen Him or knows Him. 7 Little children, make sure no one deceives you; the one who practices righteousness is righteous, just as He is righteous; 8 the one who practices sin is of the devil; for the devil has sinned from the beginning. (1 John 3)

Get wife problem solved

No, it's not! If you get the right wife the problem may be solved for a while. To rush into marriage is not a good idea at all. Too many people rush into marriages for different reasons, this is not a reason to get married! You get married because you want to live with someone for the rest of your life, even if you never can have sex with that person, you would still be with him or her. That is the commitment. Even if it may be a temporary solution to get married, one day maybe your wife or you yourself can no longer have sex, then you or your wife is back to square one. So don't marry because of this. Get to the root of the problem and marry for the right reasons.

 

[Mountainmanbob]

To put it bluntly long time ago before I was married and I was doing that occasionally I felt that it separated my fellowship with God. Felt it fast real fast if you know what I mean?

Then when I stopped doing it things got so much better in my spiritual life real quickly.

There is always a price to pay for sin and one should never forget that it has Rippling effects on others also.

It affects the way you act around others also. Sin cannot be totally hidden it seems?

M

 

[Kaon]

Things that involve dominating the other and things like urolagnia are sinful.

Fetishes.

Yes, they are a sort of corruption of the design and meaning of sex.

 

[Lots of Questions]

@ Mskriskris
Replying to post #73
It's just a go to for me because it's the one thing that works. Otherwise it's like asking "why do you drink water when you are thirsty?". Yes, obviously it's to release stress and please myself.
I think the only reason I "feel bad" about it is because I don't know exactly if it offends God or not. But I never thought of that as a supernatural way of discerning if it's a sin or not. Because the only reason I started to doubt was because at some point I must have heard or read some Christian talk about how masturbation is sinful.
I don't know if I'm running towards temptation but I don't really live in a cave, there is temptation everywhere. And it doesn't help to know or assume that my Christian friends and acquaintances aren't free of sexual sin. This is one of the things that makes me feel separated from Christians and Jesus himself: the fact that there are these alleged rules like "don't touch" (Christians say it) or "don't look at a woman with lustful thoughts" (Jesus said it), but they don't provide a real alternative. In the case of Christians I met in person I noticed a lot of cases where one sin as opposed to another is okay just because they do it (for example some Christians told me they thought premarital sex is alright, then went on to speak against homosexuals). I'm not free from this of course, it would be the same thing I'd do with masturbation (if I said for example that murder is wrong, masturbation is okay), but how can I tell who's right?
I would have loved if the New Testament had a more in depth description of the thoughts and feelings of Jesus because it feels quite distant. I'm by all means an ignorant even though I've read the New Testament but iirc Jesus said at some point he was our friend because He told us everything about Him. But I still don't know how he managed to stay away from sexual sin. Was he not tempted by sexual sins? Was he simply asexual? How did he cope with it? The Bible doesn't explain this in detail so I don't have a role model, other than Christians I meet. But Christians I meet aren't perfect and specifically in this matter they aren't.
I read Christians (but not all) saying masturbation is a sin. But how do they manage to escape from that sin themselves? It's clearly way easier for some because they married young or because they are probably closer to asexuality. Of those that claim masturbation is a sin, I pretty much never see them say how they manage to not touch, or admit they do touch.
And again, for me I think it all comes down to "if it's not a sin why not do it?". You could say "if in doubt it's better not to" but can we really be completely sure when there are people who say many random mundane things are sins (and could make you doubt)?

Sorry for the long post but I also have another question: When Jesus says it's adultery to look at a woman with lust, does he only address men and does he mean literally only women? Or is it a universal message that would apply to a homosexual man looking at another man in lust, or a woman looking at a man in lust?

 

[ThisIsMe123]

What I find interesting in some here saying, "If it doesn't glorify God, it's a sin". So...is eating ice cream glorifying God? No...you're just eating ice cream, is going bowling glorifying God? No, you're just going bowling.

Is walking from the parking lot to the front door glorifying God? No, you're just walking.

That's too broad of a brush to be saying, "If it doesn't glorify God, then it is a sin".

 

[ThisIsMe123]

I read Christians (but not all) saying masturbation is a sin. But how do they manage to escape from that sin themselves? It's clearly way easier for some because they married young or because they are probably closer to asexuality. Of those that claim masturbation is a sin, I pretty much never see them say how they manage to not touch, or admit they do touch.

You see, people are remaining single...longer, so thus they'll cave, eventually to some kind of sin. Some are being good little boys and girls at the very least not having premarital sex...but people like this, esp. men, are likely masturbating at the age of 30 if they haven't found a wife yet.

Can he be at least given credit for having remained abstinent, basically a 30 year old virgin, but still masturbates?

Is it okay to touch as long as you're saving yourself for your future spouse? If you have a picture of your fiance in a bikini, is it okay to do the deed thinking of only her? But hey, at least you hadn't had sex with her, right?

 

[salt-n-light]

What I find interesting in some here saying, "If it doesn't glorify God, it's a sin". So...is eating ice cream glorifying God? No...you're just eating ice cream, is going bowling glorifying God? No, you're just going bowling.

Is walking from the parking lot to the front door glorifying God? No, you're just walking.

That's too broad of a brush to be saying, "If it doesn't glorify God, then it is a sin".

Bowling, walking, eating ice cream in and of itself not sin. But put it into context, im gambling on who wins this bowling match, I’m eating a gallon of ice cream in one sitting, I’m walking to a strip club, and now all of a sudden the person can discern whether or not it would be sinful to participate in it, even though bowling, eating ice cream, and walking is not sin. It’s the intent.

Glorifying God is not only to add on praise and recognition,but also to avoid tainted His name and crippling your testimony.

 

[salt-n-light]

You see, people are remaining single...longer, so thus they'll cave, eventually to some kind of sin. Some are being good little boys and girls at the very least not having premarital sex...but people like this, esp. men, are likely masturbating at the age of 30 if they haven't found a wife yet.

Can he be at least given credit for having remained abstinent, basically a 30 year old virgin, but still masturbates?

Is it okay to touch as long as you're saving yourself for your future spouse? If you have a picture of your fiance in a bikini, is it okay to do the deed thinking of only her? But hey, at least you hadn't had sex with her, right?

Men get married and still cheat.

Hell men get marry, have sex with their wife, have kids, and come out as gay.

The focus should be on the condition of the heart. Being single longer makes no difference, may be a correlation, but it’s not a direct cause.