Marry with..

[marciadietrich]

I actually never minded older men - possibly even a preference, but I decided it wasn't the smart thing to do given the differences in longevity of men and women in the first place and adding an age difference to that. So my husband is almost 2 years younger, yet, ironically, he has had many problems that afflict men who are older. First heart attack at 35 with a quadruple bypass, a serious arthritic condition in his back (ankylosing spondylitis where his spine is fusing together) and now at 40 he has been diagnosed as diabetic.

So you never have a guarantee on these things. I don't think a difference in age should stop a couple from marrying each other given that both parties are adults and it is what they want.

Marcia

 

[Epiphanygirl]

I have a younger husband

 

[ukok]

Well, last time I went for 9 years older, so i just might find me a toy boy 9 years younger and see if we get along any better


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I am NOT serious!

 

[darby8]

My grandparents were 25 years apart in age! He was 50, she was 25 and had 2 kids already from her passed on husband! THAT'S robbing the cradle.

 

[colleen]

I marry the man God has set out for me to marry. The age thing, like everything else, I have put in his hands.
Colleen

 

[Veritas]

Men generally perfer younger females for fertility reasons but also because they are easier to dominate. A man wants to be head of his household and feels it would be easier if she's younger. It would be hard to imagine a man marrying a woman 15-20 years older than himself and being the one in charge. It's not always the case though, because a neighbor of mine who's about my age married a man 9 years younger and she still looks to him for leadership. But I definitley think there's something wrong about a man seeking and marrying someone substantially younger than himself. It's just not right. Some women are immature and are looking for "daddy" and some men are insecure and looking for validation of their manhood through control.

 

[Rising_Suns]

I think I will have an older spouse; the Church.

 

[colleen]

Rising Suns,
That was beautiful. I only hope there are good, strong Catholic men like you lookin for a spouse.

Colleen

 

[Fly04~J~]

Wow.. all are into marriage....

 

[Fly04~J~]

I am NOT serious! [/QUOTE]
Gottcha.....!!!

 

[3toraiseup]

My beloved is 14 years older. When we married, I was 26, he was 39. I have always leaned toward older men -- definitely for the maturity reason. My husband was not ready to be married at a younger age and had we met years before, it wouldn't have worked out. (Of course, had we met years before, he'd be in college and I'd be in 1st grade.)

In the 7 years we have known each other, our age difference has never been an issue (good or bad). We are both adults with similar values and our hearts' desires are united. Being that we are now married 5 years with children, we are also at the same stage of life with common goals and dreams. I have thought about the health issue on the other end of life, but as Marcia pointed out, you never know what is going to happen. Why should I should I spend 50 years with an 'adequate' mate when I can spend 35-40 years with a 'perfect' mate. Sometimes, you have to take the risk.

 

[Veritas]

My beloved is 14 years older. When we married, I was 26, he was 39. I have always leaned toward older men -- definitely for the maturity reason. My husband was not ready to be married at a younger age and had we met years before, it wouldn't have worked out. (Of course, had we met years before, he'd be in college and I'd be in 1st grade.)

In the 7 years we have known each other, our age difference has never been an issue (good or bad). We are both adults with similar values and our hearts' desires are united. Being that we are now married 5 years with children, we are also at the same stage of life with common goals and dreams. I have thought about the health issue on the other end of life, but as Marcia pointed out, you never know what is going to happen. Why should I should I spend 50 years with an 'adequate' mate when I can spend 35-40 years with a 'perfect' mate. Sometimes, you have to take the risk.

Most women "lean toward older men" because they are better able to provide for a wife and children...ie a father figure. They represent stability and financial means. But statistics do show that couples who are close in age have the most compatible and long lasting marriages. Some can make it work with greater age differences, but there's still a lot of life experiences that they don't have in common. And later on, those health problems can be an issue. In spite of some exceptions as has been noted, I would find it difficult to be a nurse maid to a much older husband....especially if I was at a point when I wanted to travel and be involved in kids and grandkids lives. Love can conquer a lot, but it's just a lot harder! Bottom line: you're stuck with your choices.

 

[Ann M]

In the 7 years we have known each other, our age difference has never been an issue (good or bad).

We do well until the photo album comes out and we argue about who had the worse dress sense growing up. His flares, heeled boots and "Saturday Night fever" get-up, or my teased hair, fluroscent clothes, and "Flashdance" get up.

 

[Alexis OCA]

When we met I thought she was about 5 years younger than I was...turns out she was 2 years older...I've been confused ever since.

 

[marciadietrich]

Most women "lean toward older men" because they are better able to provide for a wife and children...ie a father figure. They represent stability and financial means.

I think taking it to the level of father figure is insulting to both parties. Today's system of dating guys the same age (because you start dating in junior high or high school due to coed modern education) appears to be the exception in human history. I don't think it is a father figure thing, I think it is natural for the to be a slight difference tending towards slightly older man. Most young guys are usually immature and irresponsible compared to the women in the same age bracket (and it is simply unattractive in itself to perceive someone as lacking those things).

For me the need for someone I felt was intellectually superior was important, and since I was more intellegent than most of the guys in school I perceived educated men as having that quality.

Also, on a purely physical basis I actually prefer older, about 10 years older is what hits me consistently as most attractive. Not that I don't appreciate a nice looking man my age or younger, but still there is something missing there. I can't explain why but it is just the way it is for me. If I were to put it down to a reason it wouldn't be financial, on some level perhaps as I perceived more interest from older men than I did guys my age who didn't seem so interested in me, to the intelligence factors, but it was there before I had any perception of needing to be supported which really only hit me after I was already married and pregnant.

 

[Diane_Windsor]

I am older than my fiance by four months. My mom is older than my dad by two months. My grandmother is older than my grandfather by six months. So, at least in my family the women prefer younger men

I think that's the way it is with my family too, but I take more after two of my great-aunts. They both married men who were 15 + years older than they were. Both marriages I'm told were very happy.

DW

 

[EllenMoran]

Since my husband is almost exactly 4 years older than I am (3 yrs, 354 days to be exact ), I guess I'll have to answer "older."

 

[RhetorTheo]

My wife is two years older. But most men and women prefer the older man / younger woman situation.

 

[Epiphanygirl]

My wife is two years older. But most men and women prefer the older man / younger woman situation.

I'm 3 years older than my husband. I really don't have an age issue, I just think people should be "equally yoked" as the Bible states.
I was so very blessed and fortunate that I was very good friends with my husband for many years...way before we even started dating.

 

[Cosmic Charlie]

My preferance for women is like my perferance for cars: large and well past the break-in period.

I don't say this to be flippant so much as I find it psychologically weird.

I mean, why should my taste in a mate be the same as my taste in transportation ?
What does that say about my materialism being tied into my sexuality ? About freedom and mobility being confused with lust and passion ?

God, I'm a walking American cliche.