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Veritas

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marciadietrich said:
I think taking it to the level of father figure is insulting to both parties.

My comments weren't meant to be insulting. I'm sorry you chose to take them that way. I'm mearly pointing out what research has show for a long time. You yourself said you can't explain why you're attracted to older men. Studies have done the work for you. The basis of the attraction both men and women feel toward the opposite sex is unconscience and imbedded in our DNA. We all look for certain clues whether we realize it or not of what we subconsciously want. The way a person looks, their mannerisms, background, education and intelligence, voice, smell even, all serve to help us decide if we're interested in someone. There's way more science involved than you realize. And most of it has to do with reproduction and resources. It's the biology of mating for humans. (God designed, I might add!) BTW, age and maturity don't necessarily go hand-in-hand. There are lots of guys in their 30's, 40's, 50's on up who will never grow up.:sigh:

FYI, I'm attracted to older men as well. At least I know why;)
 
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Ann M

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marciadietrich said:
Also, on a purely physical basis I actually prefer older, about 10 years older is what hits me consistently as most attractive. Not that I don't appreciate a nice looking man my age or younger, but still there is something missing there. I can't explain why but it is just the way it is for me.

They open their mouth and you think 'Man you're so young' and closely following that comes 'It's a car thing? okay, I don't understand why you just spent $20, 000 on a brand new car 2 months ago, and now you're putting a new exhaust on becuase the original one was too quiet, it must be a male thing.' or 'I heard you turn the corner at the traffic lights, Man that's at least 500 metres away, Do you really need a subwoofer that loud? Do your ears actually work properly? Oh and could you please go and turn it off as that steady 'duf duf duf' is giving me such a headache and I can feel the floor vibrating'
 
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marciadietrich

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Veritas said:
My comments weren't meant to be insulting. I'm sorry you chose to take them that way. I'm mearly pointing out what research has show for a long time. You yourself said you can't explain why you're attracted to older men. Studies have done the work for you. The basis of the attraction both men and women feel toward the opposite sex is unconscience and imbedded in our DNA.

That is what I meant, we don't make conscious decisions in attractions, we go by what is there by nature. And it is perfectly natural for women to be attracted to slightly older men. For what I can tell I tend to hit a little outside the norm on range, but everyone is different. 'Father figure' can tend to have connotations of a fixation or dysfunction in regard to your father, where this is a perfectly normal, well-known phenomenon.

FYI, I'm attracted to older men as well. At least I know why;)

:) I knew it was natural (within a degree) but it isn't something you usually make a willful decision about ... it just hits you, it is normal to you even if it is not what society is tending to push these days.

Marcia
 
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marciadietrich

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Ann M said:
They open their mouth and you think 'Man you're so young' and closely following that comes 'It's a car thing? okay, I don't understand why you just spent $20, 000 on a brand new car 2 months ago, and now you're putting a new exhaust on becuase the original one was too quiet, it must be a male thing.' or 'I heard you turn the corner at the traffic lights, Man that's at least 500 metres away, Do you really need a subwoofer that loud? Do your ears actually work properly? Oh and could you please go and turn it off as that steady 'duf duf duf' is giving me such a headache and I can feel the floor vibrating'

^_^
 
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Veritas

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marciadietrich said:
That is what I meant, we don't make conscious decisions in attractions, we go by what is there by nature. And it is perfectly natural for women to be attracted to slightly older men. For what I can tell I tend to hit a little outside the norm on range, but everyone is different. 'Father figure' can tend to have connotations of a fixation or dysfunction in regard to your father, where this is a perfectly normal, well-known phenomenon.



:) I knew it was natural (within a degree) but it isn't something you usually make a willful decision about ... it just hits you, it is normal to you even if it is not what society is tending to push these days.

Marcia

I would like to point out a slight inconsistency in what you said, if I might. If you are generally attracted to men 10 years older, have you considered that a man you would have been attracted to 10 years ago is now your age? It's all relative. But personally, I would prefer a man to be younger than myself. Not a whole lot, but just enough that we have similar life expectancies. In addition, from what I've observed with those I know, those couplings seem to have better marriages.:) Besides, I look young for my age and a husband that is several years older actually appears to be much older! Can you say, "oh, is this your father?":eek:
 
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Fly04~J~

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Welp... I've asked most of my older friends... some said they prefer the older just for their money.. some younger coz they didn't have experience about relationship so it's easy to handle... and on top of that... some said they prefer not to get married coz they just want freedom and it's hard for them to be controlled by feeling... and the women will say that they didn't trust guys nowadays... and guys will looks to women as a playdoll.. those whoo was Christian will be able to be control by their feeling and temptation.. But I have met a women who haven't get married... she's 35... and I have no idea why.. if any one of u there can explain why.. plz.. I would love to hear... or any advices.. comment??? or some who is having the same situation... U might can explain to me.. U see, I'm 19.. and I'm growing.. ofcourse, I'm not interested in marriage but, I could learn and the women have not talking to me for a long time... she's a very busy women...
I'm not mean anything or what.. but, it's life..
 
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RhetorTheo

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Fly04~J~ said:
Welp... I've asked most of my older friends... some said they prefer the older just for their money.. some younger coz they didn't have experience about relationship so it's easy to handle... and on top of that... some said they prefer not to get married coz they just want freedom and it's hard for them to be controlled by feeling... and the women will say that they didn't trust guys nowadays... and guys will looks to women as a playdoll.. those whoo was Christian will be able to be control by their feeling and temptation.. But I have met a women who haven't get married... she's 35... and I have no idea why.. if any one of u there can explain why.. plz.. I would love to hear... or any advices.. comment??? or some who is having the same situation... U might can explain to me.. U see, I'm 19.. and I'm growing.. ofcourse, I'm not interested in marriage but, I could learn and the women have not talking to me for a long time... she's a very busy women...
I'm not mean anything or what.. but, it's life..

Fly, I don't understand. Are you lesbian and interested in this 35 yo woman? I don't think that's the case. I think you are wondering why this woman would be 35 and remain single?

A study was done recently by the University of Michigan. The more intelligent a woman is, the less likely she is to get married and have kids. Successful career women often have difficulty attracting men.

Yes, I think women generally prefer older men because they have more money. A woman who makes a lot of money will often want a man who makes more money than her. If she makes 100k/year, she wants a man who makes 101k/year. But the guy making 101k/year is dating a beautiful woman half his age.
 
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EllenMoran

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I out-earn my husband. It doesn't cause him tons of heartburn, since my company is known for having some of the best pay rates out there, but he doesn't exactly love it either.

I would wonder about that Michigan study. Is it really intelligence, or is it priorities? I mean, if a woman is as focused on her career as what you're describing, might that not be the causal factor in her not getting married/having kids? For me, while I am in school or at work, I want to absolutely be the best -- but there has been no question in my mind for many years now that my calling is to be a wife and a mother, and when that day comes that we do have a child, I have zero doubts about what my priority will be.
 
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Fly04~J~

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RhetorTheo said:
Fly, I don't understand. Are you lesbian and interested in this 35 yo woman? I don't think that's the case. I think you are wondering why this woman would be 35 and remain single?

A study was done recently by the University of Michigan. The more intelligent a woman is, the less likely she is to get married and have kids. Successful career women often have difficulty attracting men.

Yes, I think women generally prefer older men because they have more money. A woman who makes a lot of money will often want a man who makes more money than her. If she makes 100k/year, she wants a man who makes 101k/year. But the guy making 101k/year is dating a beautiful woman half his age.
LOL..... no I'm not lesbian.... maybe you got me wrong... I mean, I don't know old women nowadays.... they have a lot of ekperience and yet they refused to shared or teach the younger one... like me...She's my friend and I don't know why she didn't share anthing... I could learn rite.. that's my point...
Lol... don't get me wrong again...
 
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Rosa Mystica

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I like older, preferably 30 and over. I had to grow up pretty quickly at a young age, so I just can't identify with many people in their twenties (esp. not the early 20s). However, there are always exceptions to the rule, and I wouldn't automatically reject a wonderful, compatible person just b/c of age.
 
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RhetorTheo

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A new study by psychology researchers at the University of Michigan, using college undergraduates, suggests that men going for long-term relationships would rather marry women in subordinate jobs than women who are supervisors.

As Dr. Stephanie Brown, the lead author of the study, summed it up for reporters: "Powerful women are at a disadvantage in the marriage market because men may prefer to marry less-accomplished women." Men think that women with important jobs are more likely to cheat on them.

"The hypothesis," Dr. Brown said, "is that there are evolutionary pressures on males to take steps to minimize the risk of raising offspring that are not their own." Women, by contrast, did not show a marked difference in their attraction to men who might work above or below them. And men did not show a preference when it came to one-night stands.

A second study, which was by researchers at four British universities and reported last week, suggested that smart men with demanding jobs would rather have old-fashioned wives, like their mums, than equals. The study found that a high I.Q. hampers a woman's chance to get married, while it is a plus for men. The prospect for marriage increased by 35 percent for guys for each 16-point increase in I.Q.; for women, there is a 40 percent drop for each 16-point rise.


http://www.kband.com/bluprnt/000547.html
 
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