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marriage . . .

Discussion in 'General Theology' started by com7fy8, May 23, 2020 at 1:44 PM.

  1. com7fy8

    com7fy8 Well-Known Member Supporter

    +4,041
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    Right now, I am going through a video of Derek Prince about God being our Matchmaker.

    I do not know what he is going to say, but I find he has given various things worth evaluation; so while I am going through this, I plan to leave this video up for anyone else.

    And I plan to offer comments, as I go along. If you want to, you can just read my comments and share if you like.

    By the way, Derek . . . has died. And he founded the "Shepherding Movement". I understand that movement would put a person under another selected person, and then the person would do anything the other person said to do, without question. It wrecked people's lives. And Derek himself saw this and left the movement.

    So, his message here could be the sharing of someone who has been honest and humble enough to learn from his own errors. Or . . . possibly he will say things more or less obviously questionable. But so far I find things worth feeding on and evaluating in order to get the best possible meaning.

    Derek Prince - God is a Matchmaker Part 1 - YouTube
     
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  2. com7fy8

    com7fy8 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    He says God decided to create Adam and Eve for each other.

    To me, this can mean God should be the One who decides and guides who will marry whom. I have not verified that Derek believes and means this, but I personally trust that our Heavenly Father can make much better choices than we can :)

    So, in any case, I think it is wise not to act in isolation from God, in finding someone to marry.
     
  3. Isilwen

    Isilwen Well-Known Member

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    I think there is some merit in that. I was married, once. God definitely wasn't behind it and to be honest we were pressured by a pastor.

    This time, I sought God on my own and have a lovely girlfriend and our relationship has been the best I have ever had. We both prayed for each other and God brought us together.
     
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  4. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    I mentioned him earlier in the Arranged Marriages thread. The story I referenced is the one he shared in the book. I read it years ago.

    An interesting coincidence. God has an amazing sense of humor. :)

    ~Bella
     
  5. com7fy8

    com7fy8 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    He says that when God put them together with each other >

    "They lost their separate identity."

    Because they became one, I can see.

    And Jesus says that in order for someone to be with Him, a person needs to deny oneself > Luke 9:23.

    So, I can see > in order for two people to be successful with one another, each needs to deny oneself . . . no longer be one's own selfish and isolated self . . . so we can find out how to relate in love >

    "submitting to one another in the fear of God." (Ephesians 5:21)

    This needs to be with God, then. But Adam and Eve got alone, and that turned into a major disaster. I see, then, now a marriage, too, needs to not be in isolation.
     
  6. com7fy8

    com7fy8 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    My opinion is that we can not make it without our other Jesus family people, but this means how God has us being so essential for one another. So, yes a pastor can be someone who is not part of this.

    We need to be able to tell the difference.

    There are people who should not be pastoring, and people who should not be marrying.

    Thank you for sharing such personal things!
     
  7. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    I think it's important to have wise counsel. We have blind spots that may compromise our decision-making. I have benefited from their input a great deal.

    ~Bella
     
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  8. com7fy8

    com7fy8 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    He says God saw Adam's need to not be alone.

    From this, I get a point > our Heavenly Father knows what our real need is; so He is the One to create what really is right for us.

    But ones seeking to marry can . . . possibly . . . be trying to meet what they can see their "need" to be.

    People can be even dictators of what they have to have . . . while saying they don't believe in God being their dictator, of all things.

    And then either they start in a disaster or turn what could be good, into a disaster.

    So, I hear what someone may be thinking > look at how badly Adam and Eve did. So, they were not exactly so good for one another, and God is the One who created them and gave them to each other!! So, ones might argue that God did not do a good thing, after all, by creating marriage.

    But > God is not the One who had them ruining themselves and their marriage. He started them off as perfect creatures.

    So, if God blesses us with someone, we need to stay with God while benefiting from the person He has blessed us with. And share with other Jesus people who are good for us, too. Marriage needs to in family sharing with our various other children of God.
     
  9. com7fy8

    com7fy8 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    "God established the terms of their relationship."

    So, God who is so more and better than we are has set up what He is able to expect; and indeed this might not match well with our ability to meet His expectations.

    He believes that with believers God makes the decision > "committed believers do not make their own decision" > "for a committed believer," God takes the responsibility to provide the exact right person to marry.

    This is what I understand he is saying.

    He says, "Marriage is not a trial." And I see he means you must not marry someone in order to test if you should stay with someone. But you join with one another, and there is no option of leaving each other.

    I have gotten the impression that certain married women can already be trying to prepare men to be "plan B"!

    But this can be not committed to finding out how to love, the way God can have us succeeding. It can be allowing for weakness to continue . . . until I am giving in to things of bitterness which surely will have me fail.

    "Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them." (Colossians 3:15)

    So, instead of being ready with some back-door excuse in case I might want to get out > be unconditionally committed, how nothing and no one will have power over me to get me bitter > since God is easily able to have us succeed in loving, instead, and being creative, even.
     
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  10. com7fy8

    com7fy8 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    stopping at 23 minutes on the video . . . enough for now . . . good to see you all . . . thanks for sharing . . .
     
  11. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    God uses many methods to bring us to a place of surrender. My purpose was instrumental in helping me reach the point of embracing someone I didn't choose for the sake of something greater than myself.

    I realized it last year. But I didn't want to admit it. I wanted to maintain control. We spent three months hashing it out. He kept pricking my spirit. I relented begrudgingly. He left me alone until today. Then He enriched my understanding on the subject. Now He's laughing. So am I. We're in agreement.

    ~Bella
     
  12. Carl Emerson

    Carl Emerson Well-Known Member

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    Apart from the issue with accepting deception (a concept totally foreign to them) why conclude they were not good for one another?
     
  13. Ronit

    Ronit Active Member

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    I hope God finds me a match and I pray I'm not so stupid as to Not see it. I can be my own worst enemy sometimes
     
  14. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    I think it will be pretty obvious in time. There’s two involved, He may tell him first.

    ~Bella
     
  15. com7fy8

    com7fy8 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I would say they were good for each other . . . until they got into their deception and fell. Then, in sin, they could not be so good . . . though, yes, now that you say this, Carl . . . probably still God made them His blessing for each other . . . somehow . . . but not like they could have been by obeying Him.

    We can have so much, by having whomever God gives us; but we can spoil this to some extent. And there are Christians who have even unbelieving spouses, yet they benefit very much from them because they keep putting God first.

    On the other hand, I possibly have seen how two believers can stay at odds with each other, and because of this they keep themselves from benefiting from each other as much as they could as believers.
     
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