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Marriage in the New Testament

Michie

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“Love is patient; love is kind” (1Cor 13:4). We often hear these words of the Apostle Paul read at weddings. But do they really reflect his and other New Testament writers’ views of marriage and relationships? It’s complicated.

What does Paul say about marriage?

Paul has the most to say about marriage in 1Cor 6:1-7:39, and he focuses not so much on the love between a husband and wife but on the function of marriage to keep individuals away from illicit sexual relationships. He suggests that husbands and wives have equivalent authority over one another: the husband is not hierarchically situated above the wife (1Cor 7:4). He proposes that even within marriage, self-control is paramount. He writes, “it is better to marry than to burn,” a statement that connotes both sexual desire and the apocalyptic end of the world that Paul envisions in the Corinthians’ imminent future (1Cor 7:9).

Paul goes on to give specific advice on whether to become or remain married, depending on the individual’s current situation. The general principle for each person is “Let each of you lead the life that the Lord has assigned” (1Cor 7:17). In other words, stay as you are, in large part because an “impending crisis” (1Cor 7:26), the end of the world, is near. This is not a positive view of marriage. Love, care, children, or economic partnerships are not in sight—only sex and “burning.”

Indeed, Paul’s words about love with which I began, “love is patient; love is kind” (1Cor 13:4), come in the context not of marriage but of communal worship. Paul locates love within the community, the church, the body of Christ, not within marriage.

What does Jesus say about marriage?

Continued below.