Lying by Omission?

[JillLars]

In Romans 14, we are instructed not to cause our brothers or sisters to stumble. So, if you have a belief that others disagree with, should you lie about it, or simply not mention it to avoid causing conflict with others who disagree? For example if one person thinks something is a sin, and the other one doesn't, should they discuss their beliefs at all? I guess I am just a little confused by how far we are supposed to go to keep others from stumbling, especially with all the different viewpoints out there today.

Romans 14:13

Far from passing judgement on each other, therefore, you should make up your mind never to be the cause of your brother tripping of falling.

 

[seebs]

Welcome to the fine art of trying to figure out what to share, and what not to share. There are no easy answers here.

I generally try to shy away from confrontational issues with people I'm not sure are ready to work on them. On the other hand, if someone is doing something very destructive to others, I will almost always intervene, and if they are merely harming themselves, I will tend to gently bring the subject up.

If you come up with good insights on this issue, let us know.

 

[drdeancrosby]

In Romans 14:13 Paul specifically talks about what foods are considered unclean and should not be eaten.He's basically saying,don't argue over trival things like this.For the same reason,debates over what day of the week the sabbath should be observed,should be avoided.Some people like to stir up fights over unimportant differences.These same people usually ignore major moral problems.However,in order to prevent your brothers and sisters from stumbling into sin, errors in behavior and belief should be discussed with them.A few decades ago,many churches did not oppose racism but through lengthy criticism,eventually they changed their position.The Southern Baptist Church for instance passed a resolution a few years ago,condemning racism as a sin.That victory did not come easy!The current moral issues Christians need to debate among themselves revolve around the commandment THOU SHALT NOT KILL -war,abortion and capitol punishment.What is so crazy is that many who oppose abortion,think the other two types of mass killing are God's gift.What Jesus said about these moral outrages is this - HE WHO TAKES UP THE SWORD SHALL PERISH WITH THE SWORD.

 

[jbarcher]

(I thought the proper translation was, "thou shalt not murder". Just a paranthetical thought. And context is so valuable...@_@)

 

[12volt_man]

Jill,

Most of the things we fight about aren't really all that important in the big scheme of things.

Augustine said, "In essentials, unity. In non-essentials, liberty. In all things, charity." I very rarely find someone in the church I disagree with on the essential things but I see so much bickering over little things.

I think the most important thing we can when we see somebody who believes differently on a non-essential thing is to trust that God is working in that person's life just like He is in yours.

 

[openeyes]

In Romans 14, we are instructed not to cause our brothers or sisters to stumble. So, if you have a belief that others disagree with, should you lie about it, or simply not mention it to avoid causing conflict with others who disagree? For example if one person thinks something is a sin, and the other one doesn't, should they discuss their beliefs at all? I guess I am just a little confused by how far we are supposed to go to keep others from stumbling, especially with all the different viewpoints out there today.

I think the intent would come into play here, If you intentionally put out an idea to cause someone to stumble (that is question their faith), then that is wrong. To discuss whether a particular action is a sin or not may be considered ministering amoungst the church.
This is a subject I've recently struggled with.... I recently was given a gift of understanding, and my eyes (and mind) were opened to the great gift of the gospel. Now if I attempt to tell what I understand I need to question what my intentions are.... Am I trying to disrupt what others have learned or am I truly wanting to teach. I'll admit I did start out arrogently preaching, but soon realized that all I was doing was disrupting the message that others have been given, now I keep to myself unless consulted or baited, as a young fellow likes to do sometimes, I now gently, calmly, and rationally explain the message I gathered from my learning.
God bless

 

[aanjt]

In Romans 14, we are instructed not to cause our brothers or sisters to stumble. So, if you have a belief that others disagree with, should you lie about it, or simply not mention it to avoid causing conflict with others who disagree? For example if one person thinks something is a sin, and the other one doesn't, should they discuss their beliefs at all? I guess I am just a little confused by how far we are supposed to go to keep others from stumbling, especially with all the different viewpoints out there today.

I have before, and it wasn't because I was trying to get them to change their minds about their beliefs, per se, but for them to understand why I believe what I believe. They also explain why they believe what they do as well. Usually it is in a respectful manner, but there are times when the other person will just tell me that I'm going to hell for what I believe.

Yours in Christ,
Jen

 

[JillLars]

Thanks for responding everyone! I am wondering about this because I have repeatedly been told to disregard something I believe for the sake of others. Now, I don't want to cause anyone to stumble, but does that mean I should lie about my own beliefs and lifestyle to accomplish it? I have no interest in convincing anyone, but like Jen said, just get them to understand why I believe. Unfortunately this is sometimes impossible, so I try to avoid confrontations. If I lie by omission about different beliefs I have, I'm often accused of being ashamed, therefore my beliefs must be wrong, so really its a catch 22 and its hard to know what to do sometimes.

 

[aanjt]

Thanks for responding everyone! I am wondering about this because I have repeatedly been told to disregard something I believe for the sake of others. Now, I don't want to cause anyone to stumble, but does that mean I should lie about my own beliefs and lifestyle to accomplish it? I have no interest in convincing anyone, but like Jen said, just get them to understand why I believe. Unfortunately this is sometimes impossible, so I try to avoid confrontations. If I lie by omission about different beliefs I have, I'm often accused of being ashamed, therefore my beliefs must be wrong, so really its a catch 22 and its hard to know what to do sometimes.

There are certain things I will not discuss with certain people. It isn't because I'm ashamed, but because I know that they have already made up their mind about my beliefs and will remain close-minded. So, for me, it's a matter of "choosing my battles" in some cases. Now, there are times when I get tired of hearing a lot of bovine fertilizer from certain people, that I will state what I believe or what is actually true and not what they have been spoon-fed by those who do not know what they are talking about.

One example (and this is one of the milder examples) is when I was told that everything we do in our church is strictly for show and not for the worship of God. Well, when I told them what everything meant (the procession, the priest coming in the middle of the aisle for the Gospel, the crossing of oneself, the candles, etc) they simply said that was our way of rationalizing it when in actuality we are just putting on a show and not worshiping God. See, they had no intention of hearing what the actual things means. They all mean something to us, but they were close-minded and refused to listen.

So, because you will not talk to someone about certain things does not mean that you are ashamed, it could be because you already know how they will react and you refuse to be sucked into their agenda of an argument and that you refuse to be brought down to their level. I hope this helps

Yours in Christ,
Jen

 

[JillLars]

So, because you will not talk to someone about certain things does not mean that you are ashamed, it could be because you already know how they will react and you refuse to be sucked into their agenda of an argument and that you refuse to be brought down to their level. I hope this helps

Thank you Jen, this helps tremendously, I guess where I get a little caught up is whether or not I should mention things at all, for example, I live with my fiance, and I don't believe there's anything wrong with it. I don't want to fight with people about it, but if I say "My fiance and I got home around 10 last night" or just some conversational thing like that I may end up getting reamed out for it even though I'm not looking to pick a fight. But if I don't say anything, people accuse me of lying and being ashamed. I guess I just have to ignore them, because God knows what I believe, and he knows what my intentions are, it is just difficult sometimes.

 

[Arnold_Philips]

I think those things that Paul talks about "causing a brother to stumble" are much the same as the things he calls "godless chatter" -- just a bunch of bs that doesn't really matter, but that we still love to fight about.