Lust is normal

[DoubtingThomas29]

This thread here is more like for someone who is 18, so please if you are underage don't bother posting on this one. I am sure everyone will just ignore you.

About my thread:

I feel that lusting after one's significant other, such as a wife or husband, there is nothing wrong with that. One should watch themselves if they should haphazardly start leering at someone in public, because they may get offended. That has happen to me, but others have taken it as a compliment, so you just never know what is going to happen when you do that, it is better to do that with someone you trust, to let you do that.

I don't see anything wrong with lust when it is done in the right context, such as at home in the privacy of your bedroom, because, there that is just between the husband and the wife, nobody else, not even God if you believe in one.

It is just a part of being human really, it is how our ancestors reproduced, now a days, we simply enjoy this product of nature.

I think sex with the right person is very special, and is because that sex exists, I really think that that has what has gotten me to believe, that no matter what happens in life, as long as I am not in aganoyzing pain life will always be worth living.

I think though if I were to lose the physical ability to have sex, because of perhaps paralysis, I think that I would just have to find something else to keep me going. However, as far as being alive today and being in good health, that is really a big motive that keeps me going and trying to find someone special in my life, because of sex, and lust. I hope I find someone soon, because over the years as I have gotten older, I sure have gotten lonely, and I mean, I wouldn't mind even just having a friend, that is platonic and a women too. However, if I could find a wife sometime that would be great too.

What are your thoughts on lust? To me it is like hunger just part of the body trying to motivate you to reproduce really, but what do you think?

Also, do you have any good ideas on how to meet people, or stories on how you met your significant other or are trying to? I could use some tips.

One lonely heart,

Thomas

 

[Prodical]

I don't see anything wrong with lust when it is done in the right context

If its done right its not lust.

Youre right lust is normal. To the carnal man or the flesh of man. Spiritually its immoral to lust. theres a worldly saying that 'a mans eyes are his worst downfall.'
honestly i believe that. Your eyes can very well get you into trouble.

Its normal as well to have emotions for someone, but if you act upon them through honesty and proper expression like communication and dating to see if marriage is in the future before sexual relations then its okay.

 

[The Nihilist]

If its done right its not lust.

Youre right lust is normal. To the carnal man or the flesh of man. Spiritually its immoral to lust. theres a worldly saying that 'a mans eyes are his worst downfall.'
honestly i believe that. Your eyes can very well get you into trouble.

This is exactly why Nietzsche called your team the nihilists

 

[Prodical]

o...............k

 

[Johnnz]

There is a huge difference between normal God-designed sexual arousal and lust. As sexual beings we have sexual feelings and thoughts that are normal, and not at all lustful

Lust is a moral issue. It requires an intention to commit to something wrong. It is not just a response to something, but a deliberate, considered choice.

John
NZ

 

[sinneD]

There is a huge difference between normal God-designed sexual arousal and lust. As sexual beings we have sexual feelings and thoughts that are normal, and not at all lustful

Lust is a moral issue. It requires an intention to commit to something wrong. It is not just a response to something, but a deliberate, considered choice.

John
NZ

Thomas, you are correct in your thought process, but I tend to agree with John on the definitions..

I think, Thomas, you just need to use the right terminology. Appropriate sex within marriage is normal - call it "lust" if you will - but in reality that is normal sexual arousal..

 

[AntiCow]

I agree with sinneD. Lust is inappropriate sexual arousal, which ought to be avoided. The good stuff needs another name; I'm not sure what.

 

[TheNewAge]

There is a huge difference between normal God-designed sexual arousal and lust. As sexual beings we have sexual feelings and thoughts that are normal, and not at all lustful

Lust is a moral issue. It requires an intention to commit to something wrong. It is not just a response to something, but a deliberate, considered choice.

John
NZ

Lust is not a moral issue, rather, what you lust after, IMHO. I lust for women with round butts, huge breasts, sensual faces, and milky (or chocolate) complexions. That is normal and healthy, as opposed to men who lust for small children, teenagers, animals, etc.

Lust is what provides us with our drive to succeed and to acquire the things we desire.

IMHO, the word lust carries many negative connotations because of Christianity's and Islam's millenia-long crusade to demonize cravings of the flesh, cravings which are normal and healthy.

When we try to stiffle, divert, and demonize these drives (through chastity, abstinence, etc.), we end up with pastors molesting altar boys, medieval inquisitors who reserved their most hideous tortures for the female anatomy, and a general fear/revulsion resulting in unecessary taboos associated with one of life's most enjoyable aspects. In other words, sexually maladjusted people.

 

[OdwinOddball]

I echo TheNewAge's sentiments as to the lust topic. We are sexual beings and it is part of who we are to feel lusty towards someone we find attractive. There are certainly ways to control this lust that are conducive to a healthy and harmonious society, but what you think inside your head is your own business and cannot be evil(sinful to the religious types) unless acted on in an inappropriate way.

As to how to meet people, as someone who has recently reentered the dating pool after an extended hiatus, I highly recommend online personals. They have become a mainstream method of meeting people in todays increasingly hectic world. It requires some patience, and can take a bit to comfortable with the communication process, but in the end, it beats waiting around hoping to meet someone by chance. Yahoo and eHarmony are the two that have worked for me so far.

 

[DoubtingThomas29]

Thanks OddwinOddball,

I think I will try the e-harmony website, because I tell you, I have gotten really lonely, and I am not meeting anybody. This whole idea of I am going to meet people by chance is not working, and all I do now for fun is go on the internet debating stuff that really don't matter to anybody. I need more stimulation, and probably more money from this new job I will be starting to try and get my life on track, but, day at a time I guess. I just wish things would get better quicker.

Wish me luck!

Thomas

 

[sinneD]

I was just under 30 years old when I met my wife and shortly thereafter got married.

Don't sit back and be lonely.. get yourself involved in something.. church, volunteer work, civic activities, whatever.. the list of potential activities is endless.. sitting at home on the internet is a waste of your time..

But you also nned to be outgoing... force yourself if necessary.. don't wait for someone to introduce themselves to you... be the initiator..

When you become active in something, especially something of a volunteer nature, you will begin to meet people outside your normal daily life, and it sounds like that's what you need..

 

[Steezie]

I agree with sinneD. Lust is inappropriate sexual arousal, which ought to be avoided. The good stuff needs another name; I'm not sure what.

How do you define in-appropriate?

Lust is our word for the genetic desire to reproduce. Men tend to have wandering eyes because biologically its our JOB to jump on anything that moves and is female. It ensures survival of our species.

 

[chaz345]

I agree with sinneD. Lust is inappropriate sexual arousal, which ought to be avoided. The good stuff needs another name; I'm not sure what.

How about sexual desire/arousal?

OTOH, just because sex with one's spouse is allowed, that doesn't mean that it is impossible to lust(have inappropriate sexual desire) for them. If your sexual attraction is only focused on what you get out it, then that can be inappropriate and lustful, even if the object of your attention is your spouse.

 

[Daisy321]

Lust is a sin when I am lusting after men that I am not married too. I am sinning against myself, my husband and God.

Now lusting after my own husband, I never thought of that as wrong.
I mean, when we come together shouldn't we have a hunger and desire for one another and wouldn't that be healthy?

 

[Steezie]

Lust is a sin when I am lusting after men that I am not married too. I am sinning against myself, my husband and God.

Now lusting after my own husband, I never thought of that as wrong.
I mean, when we come together shouldn't we have a hunger and desire for one another and wouldn't that be healthy?

Why is it sinful to behave the way you were genetically programmed by your God to behave?

 

[chaz345]

Lust is a sin when I am lusting after men that I am not married too. I am sinning against myself, my husband and God.

Now lusting after my own husband, I never thought of that as wrong.
I mean, when we come together shouldn't we have a hunger and desire for one another and wouldn't that be healthy?

Yes, but hunger and desire, for one's spouse is not necessarily lust, it's sexual desire. The two are not exactly the same.

 

[Daisy321]

Steezie your question-Why is it sinful to behave the way you were genetically programmed by your God to behave?

Steezie the answer is because the bible says so.

Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.” (Matthew 5:27-28)

Actually, it says if a man looks upon a woman with lust it is adultery.

So, maybe it doesn't apply to me as a woman and I get to lust after men no problem.

hmmm...I'm thinking????

 

[Steezie]

Steezie your question-Why is it sinful to behave the way you were genetically programmed by your God to behave?

Steezie the answer is because the bible says so.

Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.” (Matthew 5:27-28)

Actually, it says if a man looks upon a woman with lust it is adultery.

So, maybe it doesn't apply to me as a woman and I get to lust after men no problem.

hmmm...I'm thinking????

That passage seems to mean anyone who looks at a woman for the sole purpose of lusting has comitted adultery

 

[chaz345]

That passage seems to mean anyone who looks at a woman for the sole purpose of lusting has comitted adultery

That's exactly what it means.

 

[Jane_the_Bane]

That passage seems to mean anyone who looks at a woman for the sole purpose of lusting has comitted adultery

Yes, and the problem here does not lie in the potential arousal, but in the willingness to betray one's partner and break the trust.

That said, partners do not own each other, even if the old Israelites counted a man's wife among his property and structured their laws accordingly, and I would consider it utterly immoral to be possessive. Trust is given and earned.

Do I feel attracted to other people aside from my fiancé? Definitely. But I neither seek such attraction, nor do I act upon it, honouring the bond of trust between us.

I do believe that it is possible to love multiple persons at the same time, but
a) our culture is so deeply entrenched in its monogamous tradition that it is hard to discard these influences, and
b) it's a problem of logistics as well, especially if some of the partners are not particularly fond of each other.