low self-worth

[goldenviolet]

I have tried to kill myself ten times and spent 4 years of my life cutting myself.
Do not even try to pretend you can talk to me about depression.
And I do understand what she's feeling. The difference being, I decided I wanted positive energy in my life, where as she is reveling in negative energy and pity, too attached to her negativity to admit someone else may have positive words for her; hence, her immediately accusation of being made fun of and lack of acceptance of positive energy. Some people want this crap in their lives (it gives them something to complain about). I'm betting she's one of them.
In any case, I've realized my mistakes. I tried to say she was a good person and now stand heavily corrected.

hi lovely daughter. you have a crown of love, intwinded with gold, jewels and roses upon your head. what i mean is you are a spotless and sweet little girl in the eyes of Jesus. He first loves us. just as we are. but He sees beauty in us.

let me exstend to you a loving *HUG*. a cyber warmfuzzy from my heart. i hear you. you have alot of rough exsperiances. it will take time to transfer it into feeling like the survivor you are. i have many physical scars too, in referance to harming self. and many tough exsperiances that have imprinted both hurt and wisdom on my life. but this is about you. your time to shine. i just wanted you to glimps a sister survivor. xo ~ love dee

 

[goldenviolet]

i've had very low selfesteem for most of my life, and now that i'm an adult nothing has changed.. curious if anyone else has had my problem and overcome it? how? i see myself as worthless and small..

*HUG* i hope to encourage you. you really created a much needed thread. you may have noticed that many will be blessed by your strength and courage to stand up and seek answers. i'm very proud of you! i've been reading your posts. i think you're one lovely and strong young lady. i think you will find that there is alot of wonderfully understanding members here. let me encourage you. when there is misunderstandings and differences; we do our best to help eachother througfh it.

addressing your opening post ... when we have a low self worth, it usually means we need time to learn to build it. this includes, unlearning the things that contributed to how you feel. (renewing of our minds)...
i can assure you, that many of us only begin to learn this as young adults. it's just something that is. so, really, most young women are searching and learning how to be, what to think, how to do, where to go, etc.
... even ladies who seem to have it all. our society is hard on us. (guys go through it too)... i think the Lord opens our eyes to lessons as we are ready to learn them. being a kid/teen leaves us subject to how other's see us (unless parents are training us to see ourselves as the Lord does)... we build on exsperiances of a pushy, self absorbed, and competive generation. so you can say "i finally survived being a teen" ... now you're a young woman. you get to learn how to feel beautiful and covered with silks and roses and a lovely crown of wisdom. it takes all of us time to find our gifts and passions. you get to start here! think of a candle lit bubble bath. enjoy and soak up all the wonderful sensations of it all.
xo ~ love dee

 

[Romanseight2005]

Goldenviolet you have a wonderful gift and a beautiful heart! Thank you for blessing this thread.

Ladies, I have been blessed with a gifting for giving awesome massages! My left hand looks like a charlie Brown hand, as my fingers are just nubbies, and I have no nails on them. What is so awesome about this is that I can really dig into those muscles and hit all of the really hurting places. I smooth out the aches and pains. Anyway, I am sharing this with you all, because I am giving you massages in my heart. If I ever see you in person, I owe you a message.

 

[sh2st]

yes, thankyou. I really think that is good advice. I need to get out more often and find out what kind of woman God created me to be.

 

[goldenviolet]

oooh *shoulders are visualizing* ... how sweet that you found a blessing in a 'thorn'. my thorn is mental illness. i've been in hospitals since i was 13. i'm bi-polar with scitzophrenic tendancies. BPD, PTSD, and a few more. i take meds three times aday. last time i was in hospital for a phycotic episode was last monday. ~ however i find many blessings in my 'thorn'... one, i can relate to alot of different kinds of hurt. i've had a rough life and then some. this is why i minister in recovery.

let me assure all of you there is stepping stones out of life exsperiances to aid us in many ways. "shaping us"... a continual daily walk for us all. we all need daily love, ecceptance, validation, encouragement, and management resources and skills to build us and eachother up. eventually, we will find these blessings and strengths in every 'thorn'.

even out of abuse. i've been abused in many ways. through this, i've learned to have patience and compassion and love for my survivor sisters. it is not my pain anymore, the pain is gone. replaced by a strong desire to give what i did not get in the face of this kind of pain.

everything in life is a process. we all really have alot of gifts to share with eachother. did you know that being in need and feeling broken is a gift to others? to the people chosen to build and minister, your neediness and brokeness is a passion for us to be the hands and feet of Jesus. to love you is our joy. so. never feel shame or a burden. we all need ministered to and loved. it's your turn. ... if you don't feel what you need from one of us, then we'll help you find the resources that you do need.
~ xo love dee

 

[goldenviolet]

yes, thankyou. I really think that is good advice. I need to get out more often and find out what kind of woman God created me to be.

bless your heart! ... i have to go run some errands with two of my kids. but i'll be back later. you post whatever's on your heart! ~ be back later, xo love dee the cyber and CF junkie. lol.

 

[Romanseight2005]

Wow! GoldenViolet you are a wonderful example of these scriptures!

2 Cor 12:9
9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness . Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
KJV

 

[Romanseight2005]

yes, thankyou. I really think that is good advice. I need to get out more often and find out what kind of woman God created me to be.

Amen! You are His beautiful daughter! Are you ready for your massage?

 

[sh2st]

massage and a make-over! lol

 

[Romanseight2005]

massage and a make-over! lol

So, maybe a day at the spa?

 

[Romanseight2005]

Oh! Then we could go shopping and have a night on the town!

 

[E-beth]

i've had very low selfesteem for most of my life, and now that i'm an adult nothing has changed.. curious if anyone else has had my problem and overcome it? how? i see myself as worthless and small..

I suffer from pretty low self esteem too. Once when I was a teen and in counselling, the therapist asked me to tell him three things about myself. Two were negative, and I couldn't think of a third. That really helped me see how pessimistic I am about myself.

When I get really down, my self esteem issues get worse. Then I have to remind myself that people say I am (insert good quality) because I sure don't feel like I am worth anything. And if you don't get good support when you are depressed and feeling bad about yourself, it is so hard to get out of that horrible cycle.

My husband is disabled as well, and it gets rough for him to feel like he is worth much when he can barely move most of the time. He has discovered that you have to find interests and hobbies that you are able to do which bring you joy.

What I mean to say, lots of us understand you, sister. Let's stick together and get through and tell each other how special and awesome we all are.

 

[sh2st]

i'm working on starting the hobby of selling stuff online. it'll give me a daily project that helps the family financialy, makes me feel useful. all i need is a laptop.. lol. wish me luck!

 

[goldenviolet]

praying for your hobby/business and a laptop.

someone once told me that we need to 'self talk' to ourselves as if we were a beloved and special friend... tender, encouraging, pacient... etc.

none of that, 'i'm stupid'... etc.

when you catch yourself thinking anything that you wouldn't want a loved friend to think; practice telling this lady the things that are true, and what she really needs. lol... it sounds funny, but when you really think about it, we are really hard, judgemental, and impacient with ourselves. the complete oppiset of how Jesus views us.

practice... practice... practice! ~ xo love dee

 

[sahjacq]

I want to lift all my sister's up, to the lords light for his loving touch and ask for pray that we all grow strong as women, women who find the waking day in this world a struggle, lord bless all of us to find comfort in you and to value who we are, and the road of teachings you have given us all, as hard as the road travels let your light always be at the end of the road so we know you are there for our guidance, so we can look up and seek you father when the road is rocky. amen.

 

[JPPT1974]

Praying for you all and that
God will lift you all up
Believe me I have been there and done that before!

 

[MeekOne]

Need to move this thread to the Recovery section under Self-esteem subforum for a better response.

 

[sh2st]

well i hope the thread can help more people in its new home..

 

[4Him22]

I have suffered with low self esteem for as long as I can remember. But just recently has God shown me an answer. Its actually rather simple. Let God love you! Just allow Him to show you how much He loves you and how precious you are. Believe me thats not something he wants to hole back from anyone. Once this happens you will see things change. Its amazing what Gods awesome love can do!

 

[IntoTheCrimsonSky]

No, I can't honestly say i have low self esteem. Sometimes, I get "down". But that's normal I think. There is a forum here on CF for low self esteem. That might be better help for ya sweety. I'm sure you're a fabulous person and just haven't realized it yet. Really. God bless ya.

I know what you're going through. Over the past couple years I put my own self aside in so many ways, so that I could help others..that I more recently realized I actually stopped caring about myself all together. I now feel selfesh if I even want/think anything, unless it is also wanted by those near me.

It's a really tough place to be, and an even harder place to be in. I hope you can find some support, as I have been. If you ever need someone to talk to, PM me.

ALWAYS remember, you are very important to God. That's kept me going for a long time now. He doesn't want to see you suffer.

Blessings and Love,
Sarah