Looking at Women

[MynameisSam]

I realize that if I look at a woman to lust, I have committed adultery with her in my heart. But when does looking at a woman admiringly cross the line into lust?

 

[Rigatoni]

If it becomes covetous, that's probably when it's crossing the line. Admiring beauty and then turning away should be fine.

 

[ajcarey]

If you rightly understand what covetousness and lasciviousness are that nearly or altogether sums it up. You can have one of these or both of these at the same time.

Lascivious is sensual gratification related to sexual desire- and this can be accompanied or unaccompanied by coveting.

Covetousness is desiring that which is another's and/or exalting a desire for something or someone inordinately- and this can be accompanied or unaccompanied by lasciviousness.

So just because you do not desire to actually be with a woman as your wife or girlfriend doesn't mean it's okay to look at her, interact with her, or think of her with a lascivious purpose.

And just because you do not have lascivious intentions does not mean that it's okay to desire another man's wife to be yours and/or long after any woman who is not your wife (if you are married) and/or obsess over making a woman your wife (even if you're both single- obsession is still idolatry and these are related to inordinate, unmoderated desire).

 

[ajcarey]

I realize that if I look at a woman to lust, I have committed adultery with her in my heart. But when does looking at a woman admiringly cross the line into lust?

And loving our neighbor as ourselves helps clarify things. How should/would we want men to interact with, look at, and think of our mothers and our sisters? If a guy was interested in marrying your sister, how should he go about it? How should treat and consider her at each stage leading to marriage?

If we have godly intentions for our own family, then that will give a world of insight into your question when love thy neighbor as thyself is honestly accounted for in the equation.

 

[Pádraigín Ní Saorlaith]

Ask yourself if you are admiring the woman as a human being made in the image of God or as an object. When you find you are ceasing to see the woman as a person and seeing her instead as a thing to possess, then it is lust.

 

[blackribbon]

Would you be okay with other men quietly admiring this woman the same way you are, if she were your wife or sister or mother? If not, time to turn away and clear your thoughts.

 

[Lost4words]

I guess other dog owners are happy i am kept on a short lead!