- Oct 15, 2008
- 197
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- Faith
- Catholic
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- Married
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- US-Libertarian
Personally, I think our lenten sacrifice is akin to voting; I draw the curtain and it's between God and I.
But I wanted to share this seasons sacrifice. I usually give up something I shouldn't be doing anyhow; soda, chocolate (so hard), cursing, etc.
After praying about it this time, I gave up being selfish.
Geeze, I had no idea what I was in for...or how selfish I was. This has been such a 'teachable moment' as they say. Where I am most selfish is with my wife of 23 years....and that pains me the most.
So, time to make amends: I get up every morning - and when she gets up it's still very dark -and get her her morning caffeine ( Diet Coke) and put it by her make-up sink.
I also switched cars: I had the nice SUV with all the bells and whistles; she had the family hauler with 80k miles and rides like a truck. No more. She was stunned, but quite honestly, she looks much cuter in the nice SUV!
The house is clean when she gets home; dishwasher emptied. (I get home first)
On a painful and intimate note, I though I was a good lover....and I came to the conclusion I was not. Although kind, gentle and considerate, I always had the motive of getting what I needed or wanted, and felt jilted when I didn't. I didn't realize the sacrifical love that Jesus gave also extended into intimate areas. What a fool I have been for all these years. The new perspective has opened my eyes - and my heart - to the possibility of bringing our marriage to a whole new level. It is hard to articulate, but sex is now not a zero sum game. It is a sharing, bonding. evocative moment where we trade hearts. Just embracing her seems enough - everything just seems like an added bonus.
Well, this lenten lesson will stay with me far past Easter. I am happy for it.
But I wanted to share this seasons sacrifice. I usually give up something I shouldn't be doing anyhow; soda, chocolate (so hard), cursing, etc.
After praying about it this time, I gave up being selfish.
Geeze, I had no idea what I was in for...or how selfish I was. This has been such a 'teachable moment' as they say. Where I am most selfish is with my wife of 23 years....and that pains me the most.
So, time to make amends: I get up every morning - and when she gets up it's still very dark -and get her her morning caffeine ( Diet Coke) and put it by her make-up sink.
I also switched cars: I had the nice SUV with all the bells and whistles; she had the family hauler with 80k miles and rides like a truck. No more. She was stunned, but quite honestly, she looks much cuter in the nice SUV!
The house is clean when she gets home; dishwasher emptied. (I get home first)
On a painful and intimate note, I though I was a good lover....and I came to the conclusion I was not. Although kind, gentle and considerate, I always had the motive of getting what I needed or wanted, and felt jilted when I didn't. I didn't realize the sacrifical love that Jesus gave also extended into intimate areas. What a fool I have been for all these years. The new perspective has opened my eyes - and my heart - to the possibility of bringing our marriage to a whole new level. It is hard to articulate, but sex is now not a zero sum game. It is a sharing, bonding. evocative moment where we trade hearts. Just embracing her seems enough - everything just seems like an added bonus.
Well, this lenten lesson will stay with me far past Easter. I am happy for it.
