I was raised Christian, but had doubts when I was young (10 to 13 years old). One preacher said I needed blind faith. But that same day, my mother asked me, "If your friend told you to jump off a bridge, would you?" I realized with blind faith, I would. So that was unsatisfactory.
So I looked for proof of God. It wasn't something that was easy to talk about then due to my age. However, I was finally told that God answers all prayers. So I thought about it.
My reasoning went like this:
1. God wants me to find or keep salvation.
2. To have salvation, I need belief that He exists and belief in Jesus.
3. God listens to prayers and has unlimited powers.
4. So I just need to pray for God to tell me the lottery numbers right before they are called out. That way I only gain knowledge that He exists without any financial gains.
This seemed simple to me. I would be able to keep and reinforce my faith and know I am on the right track in my spiritual beliefs. It was also a good enough test that it wasn't open to any internal biases like guessing who is calling me on the phone or guessing what was for dinner.
As you can probably surmise, this did not work out for me. I tried the lottery proof. I tried flipping coins to see if God would let it come up heads 10 times in a row. I prayed for God to just show me some kind of sign that He existed and was not just made up like all the other gods.
In the end, I lost my belief in God. I remained open minded to the possibility He could exist, but I could not actively believe in Him anymore.
So with that long preface, here is what I am questioning: With such simple tests that anyone can perform to convince themself that God is real, why doesn't God reveal Himself?
One simple answer could be that He does want blind faith. Is that it?
Another is that He doesn't like to be tested. But in the Bible, God does prove Himself over and over like when He lights a fire for the priests of Ba'al or Jesus lets Thomas feel the holes. So it appears He is ok with proving truths in the past just not nowadays.
Do you think that God doesn't want everyone to have proof of His existance? Maybe just a select few?
Or is it something else?
So I looked for proof of God. It wasn't something that was easy to talk about then due to my age. However, I was finally told that God answers all prayers. So I thought about it.
My reasoning went like this:
1. God wants me to find or keep salvation.
2. To have salvation, I need belief that He exists and belief in Jesus.
3. God listens to prayers and has unlimited powers.
4. So I just need to pray for God to tell me the lottery numbers right before they are called out. That way I only gain knowledge that He exists without any financial gains.
This seemed simple to me. I would be able to keep and reinforce my faith and know I am on the right track in my spiritual beliefs. It was also a good enough test that it wasn't open to any internal biases like guessing who is calling me on the phone or guessing what was for dinner.
As you can probably surmise, this did not work out for me. I tried the lottery proof. I tried flipping coins to see if God would let it come up heads 10 times in a row. I prayed for God to just show me some kind of sign that He existed and was not just made up like all the other gods.
In the end, I lost my belief in God. I remained open minded to the possibility He could exist, but I could not actively believe in Him anymore.
So with that long preface, here is what I am questioning: With such simple tests that anyone can perform to convince themself that God is real, why doesn't God reveal Himself?
One simple answer could be that He does want blind faith. Is that it?
Another is that He doesn't like to be tested. But in the Bible, God does prove Himself over and over like when He lights a fire for the priests of Ba'al or Jesus lets Thomas feel the holes. So it appears He is ok with proving truths in the past just not nowadays.
Do you think that God doesn't want everyone to have proof of His existance? Maybe just a select few?
Or is it something else?