Just wondering...

[California Dreamin']

Okay, first of all I am not married.
I was just wondering what you think about pre-marital sex if you are engaged to someone...
What kind of things can we do together before we are married... when we are alone? (I am trying to avoid being alone together as much as possible, but I know it's bound to happen.)
Also, this is a long distance relationship. (A Canadian and an American) What are some things we can do when we are together? He was supposed to come here for the summer with me, but he can't get leave to come. (military)
How did you know your spouse was 'the one'?

PS-I am not planning on getting married anytime soon, I'm not engaged either... just curious

 

[GirlieGirl]

Well here's an answer you don't want to hear. If you have to honestly ask someone if (state an intimate active here) is crossing the line, then God is probably convicting your heart that it's wrong.

As far as premarital sex...I'll answer you like this: When says in the Bible that He does not permit premarital sex, do you know what He means? Well, He means that God does not in a shape or form permit premarital sex. No ifs, ands, buts, or bending the rules whatsoever.

 

[California Dreamin']

i don't even have a boyfriend, i was just asking

 

[Tami]

i don't even have a boyfriend, i was just asking

If you don't have a boyfriend, then who was the guy you were talking about when you said this:

Also, this is a long distance relationship. (A Canadian and an American) What are some things we can do when we are together? He was supposed to come here for the summer with me, but he can't get leave to come. (military)

It sounded like you were talking about a guy that you are presently in a relationship with. Was this a hypothetical situation that you were talking about?

 

[desi]

The down and dirty answer I have is you can do anything above the belt, either of yours. Nothing below. Others will disagree with me here and I respect their views as mine are rather arbitrary.

 

[Tami]

The down and dirty answer I have is you can do anything above the belt, either of yours. Nothing below. Others will disagree with me here and I respect their views as mine are rather arbitrary.

I must say, that certainly is a dirty answer, desi. We are supposed to flee fornication. Doing those things which are "above the belt" as you put it, is not fleeing fornication and is in fact running to it because doing those things certainly leads to fornicatation. Not to say that people who do the things which are "above the belt" will always end up having sex, but it certainly has that potential so it can hardly be considered fleeing fornication.

"Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body." 1 Corinthians 6:18

 

[pegatha]

Well, to me, "engaged" is just another word for "not married". Engagements are broken sometimes, even at the very last minute. That's why I think it's important for the engaged couple to behave in a way that would not cause either one of them shame, embarassment, or regret if they ended up calling the marriage off later on. There are definitely "above the belt" activities that are way too intimate for unmarried couples. Besides, what's so terrible about waiting till you're married? Isn't it special to know that you've only done [fill in the blank] with your very own husband or wife, within the sanctity of your own marriage? Some things really are all the better for having had to wait.

 

[Svt4Him]

Sorry desi, if you are not married to someone, as a guy, those 'above the belt' things have a way of getting stuck in our minds. And the sin may not be sex, it will be what's going on in our minds that evokes lust.