Alright, here it goes.Before I even begin to explain what I believe or struggle to believe, I think it is appropo to tell you about my background, my life.I was born to parents with money. They took a lot of trips, etc, went to horse races, the normal "Southern Folks With Money" crowd. And of course, we went to church. Not every week, but we went. I guess the best way to describe it was "passively" attending church. Sing hyms, listen to the preacher, and the rest of the week do your own thing.Well my parents divorced when I was 11, but that introduced me to a Baptist church my dad was attending. From the age of 14 till 18 I went to MissionFuge, a week long summer camp for middle and high schools to spread the word of Christ through working in a community in Philly, NY, or wherever else we went. I went, and it didnt really affect me.It wasnt until I was 18 that I started really thinking about the unsurety of the future, about my plans after college. I quickly got over that, however. Now that im in college, and about to graduate in May 2007, I am unsure of my future life and plans as well. I am struggling to find my place in life and struggling to find what I believe in. The other religions do not make sense to me. Whether it be elephants holding up the world, or just morals that do not make any sense to me, religions dont hold up.Except for Christianity. Christianity, to me, is noble. I just dont know why I cannot accept Christ and change my life. I am thinking its the whole "change of life and culture." I am afraid of leaving the "me" now and heading into a new "me." I dont know if anyone would accept that, and I doubt I should care who doesnt accept it because they probably arent Christians. My girlfriend, who is agnostic like me, wouldnt want me to really give my life in the direction of Christ because that would mean no more sex until marriage, and I really dont want to lose her. Shes so important to me. I love her deeply. I dont think she finds sex too important, but, she means a ton.I am struggling to find my place in life and I know finding that "place" is important. Im a good person, but I know being a good person isnt going to cut it in the eyes of God, according to Christianity. I try to be nice and pleasant with everyone and help others whenever possible. I guess I just need everyones prayers.Thank you guys. I hope I can find my way.