Just tired of everything!

[StLGirl]

Don't even know where to start. I'm in one of those moods, the smallest things set me off. But I have felt depressed on and off at least half of my life. I never do anything about it though. I'm scared the doctor will just tell me to lose weight (part of my problem is my health) and to talk to a therapist, which I don't want to do because I'll just break down and bawl the whole time. Not to mention, I most likely can't afford it.

First off I'm unemployed, trying to go back to college at least, they lose my paperwork. MORE money down the drain, which is another problem. I don't need to be rich. But I want to be able to afford the upkeep on my car (no public transport here!) and pay for meds, I barely have clothes I can wear anymore, etc. It's depressing I'm in debt to my eyeballs.

I have gained like 30 pounds in the past 2 years or so, and I quit eating out the past year. I work my BUTT off in the gym and went to a nutrionist. I eat a lot more veggies. The nutritionist had to stop working due to pregnancy and there's no one to take her place. I can't lose any weight.

Not to mention I don't even feel better! I walk up a flight of stairs... it's tough! The other day I almost dropped to my knees from it. And I been doing high-impact aerobics since March. Needless to say I can barely get through a class, but I do!

I zone out alot. I can barely get out of bed. Today I was in bed almost 13 hours. I woke up like every 2 hours. I'm in the bathroom all the time!

I was tested for diabetes and thyroid a couple years ago, they said I was fine. I get migraines, the doc just said, Well what do you want me to do about it? He was mean, I don't want to go back. Complaining about him didn't even do a bit of good!

My husband seems to just bow out of our marriage. He thinks because he has a high-stress job and I don't that all the household responsibilities are mine. Not just cooking, cleaning, laundry but I have to make all his appointments, I'm tired of reminding him to make appointments, to call his mom on her bday, and telling him after living here a year what our address is because he doesn't know! I do everything short of wiping his you know what.

He's totally into porn, online gaming, it sucks. Then I find tonight he smokes, that makes me so sad.

Half the people I thought were my friends aren't, everytime I give an opinion I get bashed or argued with, I'm so lonely, wow I just dumped way too much on here, I'm sorry!

I need to quit feeling sorry for myself though!

 

[rocklife]

if you have kids, you are going to add wiping to your list, but I guess it won't be his.

I hope things get better. I don't have much to share, but maybe put in some prayer requests for your needs, and continue in Bible times, I get lot of encouragement from the Bible and prayers, I also like bible on walkmen tapes, its portable. I hope things get better. I'm praying for you too

I do believe porn can be one of those things that does fall into adultery category (Jesus says lust can be same as adultery in God's eyes), so if it is really bad and taking all your peace and separation is needed, I believe that can be an option

 

[CyberPaladin]

I'm sorry your having such a rough time right now StLGirl it sounds like things are going really bad for you I will be praying for you.

 

[StLGirl]

Thanks all. I feel better today. I go through these periods of feeling low. I'm just trying to get a handle on everything - some days I just feel like everything that can go wrong will go wrong. Somedays I feel like I can't keep my head above water with all that is expected of me, all that I have to do, and I'm living in another country and at times there are challenges to be dealt with. Just trying to take a deep breath today and get myself under control.

 

[x0xJesusIsLovex0x]

I know how you feel. It sucks, I know. But then again, God is out there to listen to all your problems. He's there, talk to Him, make Him hear you. He will help. And take babysteps to help you along the way. One at a time. It helps. Depression sucks majorly I know. I have been dealing with it for the past year and I'm only 15.

 

[Starr SDA Living Word]

Thanks all. I feel better today. I go through these periods of feeling low. I'm just trying to get a handle on everything - some days I just feel like everything that can go wrong will go wrong. Somedays I feel like I can't keep my head above water with all that is expected of me, all that I have to do, and I'm living in another country and at times there are challenges to be dealt with. Just trying to take a deep breath today and get myself under control.

Dear Heavenly Father,
Lord I lift my dear sister up to you now. Lord I ask you to rap your arms around her and show her you are there with her right now. Lord I thank you for her feeling better today, Lord I ask you to Heal her and I and all that suffer with depression. Lord you know I can relate with this. I love you Lord, for allowing me to go through this, for strengthening me, and Helping me to help other with it. Lord I praise You for all you allowed me to go through. I Pray for this sister to be the same way. That she will see and feel special. Because Lord you know she is more precious then any jewel. You made her and love her unconditionally, You said come and ask me for anything, Well LORD, I am asking you to take this depression from my dear and special sister, Heal her Father. Lord I ask for both of us to Lose weight Healthy, Lord I also have disabilities but you carry me when I am down. So Lord, I am ok now. I want you to focus on my sister today. Lord show her your word and in love, Find her a friend close to her, that will be a true friend. Maybe a prayer partner, what ever is according to your word Lord. Lord Help me to be a good friend to this sister and to others as well. Let my words, be your words. You are a awesome God. Lord I rebuke the devil on behalf of my Sister and I demand him to FLEE IN THE MIGHTY NAME OF JESUS CHRIST RIGHT NOW> AND TO NEVER RETURN TO HARM MY SISTER. Satan has no authority over us, I know this. But when we are down Satan lies to us, makes us fret. But LORD NO MORE, Jesus Bought back our power on that day on the Cross. Lord I am sorry for not having enough faith to come to you first. Lord build our faith, so the enemy can't fool us any more. LORD thank you for hearing our prayers for help. Thanks for taking care of my special sister. Build her up and make her what you want her to be. Lord I also lift up her husband to you. Lord heal him from his sins, make him a loving Husband and a good provider and make him see porn for what it really is. Satans Trap. It could have been his mother or sister, cousin, aunt and teach him how to over come this. Build him In to a MAN YOU would be proud of. Lord thank you for teaching me. Lord thank you for all you do. THank you Lord For loving all your children the same.

In your Son's Precious Name Jesus Christ,I pray, Amen.

Starr.

If you ever need a friend, Please feel free to PM me anytime. I would love to be a friend of yours.

Remember this: YOU ARE SPECIAL< MORE PRECIOUS THEN ANY JEWEL>!!!!

 

[AWorkInProgress]

Don't even know where to start. I'm in one of those moods, the smallest things set me off. But I have felt depressed on and off at least half of my life. I never do anything about it though. I'm scared the doctor will just tell me to lose weight (part of my problem is my health) and to talk to a therapist, which I don't want to do because I'll just break down and bawl the whole time. Not to mention, I most likely can't afford it.

First off I'm unemployed, trying to go back to college at least, they lose my paperwork. MORE money down the drain, which is another problem. I don't need to be rich. But I want to be able to afford the upkeep on my car (no public transport here!) and pay for meds, I barely have clothes I can wear anymore, etc. It's depressing I'm in debt to my eyeballs.

I have gained like 30 pounds in the past 2 years or so, and I quit eating out the past year. I work my BUTT off in the gym and went to a nutrionist. I eat a lot more veggies. The nutritionist had to stop working due to pregnancy and there's no one to take her place. I can't lose any weight.

Not to mention I don't even feel better! I walk up a flight of stairs... it's tough! The other day I almost dropped to my knees from it. And I been doing high-impact aerobics since March. Needless to say I can barely get through a class, but I do!

I zone out alot. I can barely get out of bed. Today I was in bed almost 13 hours. I woke up like every 2 hours. I'm in the bathroom all the time!

I was tested for diabetes and thyroid a couple years ago, they said I was fine. I get migraines, the doc just said, Well what do you want me to do about it? He was mean, I don't want to go back. Complaining about him didn't even do a bit of good!

My husband seems to just bow out of our marriage. He thinks because he has a high-stress job and I don't that all the household responsibilities are mine. Not just cooking, cleaning, laundry but I have to make all his appointments, I'm tired of reminding him to make appointments, to call his mom on her bday, and telling him after living here a year what our address is because he doesn't know! I do everything short of wiping his you know what.

He's totally into porn, online gaming, it sucks. Then I find tonight he smokes, that makes me so sad.

Half the people I thought were my friends aren't, everytime I give an opinion I get bashed or argued with, I'm so lonely, wow I just dumped way too much on here, I'm sorry!

I need to quit feeling sorry for myself though!

Sorry I wanted to reply eariler but problems got in the way.

You are a very strong and intelligent woman. Saddly made some choices that have lead to this. We all do that, but this is the starting point for which you pick yourself back up.

First I need you to realize that your faith and hope in our Lord and Great Father are very important. As you start to reclaim your life, you are going to need that relationship for you to grab onto. There will be times where unsure or insecure because what you know you must do. Remember that our Lord knows you, he been with you all this time. Learn to listen for him and follow. He will make your paths straight.

Like I said, you are a beautiful child of God. So is your husband, but he lives for his sins. Take this year with what extra time you have, really sit down and study the bible. Get a New Living Translation if you can, be easy to understand. Read thru New testiment and Psalms/Proverbs. Let the teachings of Jesus be the rock in which your mind stands on. So when the rain comes, you won't be washed away.

Do not worry about college and your weight. Focus on what is most important for now. Really set your priorities straight as to what you want to do and where you want to go. Becareful of life's distractions like TV and computers, they really only waste your time.

First just get a job that pays well or works with your schedual to get you started.

Second, build a foundation of Rock by becoming a true dissiple of Jesus.

Third, spend the next 2 years really focus on yourself. Learn your strengths and weaknesses. We all have talents on loan from God. Just matter of understanding, nurturing, and accepting them.

Lastly when you are wiser and spiritually stronger. Take some risks that are needed to get you going. Someone who is truly free can risk.

I can only speak the truth sister. Only person that can save you is yourself. Sometimes, if not all the time, you need to defeat yourself in order to grow. Or as the bible puts it, nail your sins to your own cross. Which you must carry with you.

Your husband... he has already committed adultry openly. Jesus prefers if you can save your marriage. Proverbs say seek wise counsel, and I do not have experience in this field.

Here are some starter passages of wisdom to help get you started.

Matthew 7:7
7 &#8220;Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.

This is important, like with your doctor not doing his job. If he can not give you the answers you seek. Keep on seeking, asking, and knocking till someone can give you answers. This goes for all things, job finding, seeking knowledge, understanding, or anything you need in order to grow. Do not be satified with "I don't know." You have the gift of the internet and wealth of information at your finger tips. Libruaries I am starting to learn have great source of knowledge.

Luke 6:46-49
[h5]Building on a Solid Foundation[/h5]
46 &#8220;So why do you keep calling me &#8216;Lord, Lord!&#8217; when you don&#8217;t do what I say? 47 I will show you what it&#8217;s like when someone comes to me, listens to my teaching, and then follows it. 48 It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against that house, it stands firm because it is well built. 49 But anyone who hears and doesn&#8217;t obey is like a person who builds a house without a foundation. When the floods sweep down against that house, it will collapse into a heap of ruins.&#8221;

Galatians 5:16-26
[h5]Living by the Spirit&#8217;s Power[/h5]
16 So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won&#8217;t be doing what your sinful nature craves. 17 The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, so you are not free to carry out your good intentions. 18 But when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses.

19 When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, 21 envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.
22 But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things! 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. 25 Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit&#8217;s leading in every part of our lives. 26 Let us not become conceited, or provoke one another, or be jealous of one another.

You can say this is Paul's pyschology of what is going on in our minds. The battle between our Spirit and our sinful nature. Really read this and meditate on it. The sinful nature screams and is always drowning out the spirit. Spirit is like a whisper in your mind, but you will know it once you hear it. For it will be opposite of the screams. Learn to focus on that voice and let it lead you.

2 Chronicles 7:14-15

14 Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land. 15 My eyes will be open and my ears attentive to every prayer made in this place.

This is what God told his people long ago on how to be free from sin. This goes beyond sin and be used as problem solving skill. First humble yourself admitting you have a problem. Second pray to our Great Father and our Lord to talk about it and ask for understanding/guidance/or whatever you need. Third, seek his face not his hand. Seek out the knowledge needed to solve the problem. Lastly is to apply that knowledge and go thru the process of turning from your wicked ways.

In short admit you got a problem, seek understanding, seek knowledge, and lastly apply knowledge making it your wisdom.

Proverbs 19:8
To acquire wisdom is to love oneself;
people who cherish understanding will prosper.

Wiser you become and more you understand, the bolder you become.

I hope this will get you started on your journey. I will add you to my prayers.