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Just need someone to listen.

Sploosh

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Well guys, this is my first post (obviously), so I'll give some background info first. I'm 16, I attend an incredibly small, private school (4 people in the sophomore class) that grants me/my classmates a LOT of freedom (which I enjoy). I currently have a "Paul" figure in my life (which I'll explain later) who really set me on-fire for the faith, but recently we have been cut off, but I'm getting ahead of myself.

The pastor at our church preached a sermon about Acts 16-19ish, about a the unbeatable duo of Paul and Silas. Skipping to the main point, Paul shared his wisdom with Silas and helped him grow in the faith. That's basically what I meant whenever I said I had a Paul.


Okay, so being a teenaged guy in highschool, I do some stupid things... almost all of the time they are unintentional, or just old habits. What basically happened is that I pestered my teacher to her last thread, and then she was talking with the other teachers (as teachers do), and my "Paul's" older sister is actually employed as a teacher at our school too, so she overhears my dear math teacher talking about how rude her class is (and it is literally 100% me, no one in the class is really bad, JUST ME.), and Paul's sister gets furious and tells her parents, who are coincidentally Paul's parents too, and gets her grounded for a month. Literally, grounded from just about everything... mainly the phone. Now... this wouldn't be too big of a deal, BUT Paul is homeschooled (except for the 1 class she takes at my school), and her ONLY form of communication to anyone, including me, is VIA THE PHONE. (this is when I face-desked)

Now if you're still reading through all my terrible grammar (kudos if you are still reading), you're probably thinking "That's not that bad". Well it IS that bad. I'm on my own, I have no one to talk to about my faith, no accountability partner, and honestly no one who understands me. And why? Because I couldn't keep my mouth shut.


So now I'm in this slum, I always feel really down and such, and can't get over the fact that it's my fault. I basically feel like I'm falling right back into my life before she (paul) inspired me to be just a better Christian, and why? Because of my mouth.

Yeah, so I dunno why I posted this, just had to tell SOMEONE, I guess I'll get a bunch of "That sucks" replies, and I know this isn't anything as bad as other people are going through.


Thanks for reading.
 

singpeace

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Hi Sploosh. Welcome to CF. It's good to know you.

First, let me say that the fact that you recognize what got you into this fix, and the fact that you are open and honest about it with us shows that you have more wisdom than a lot of young men your age. Most would blame everyone and everything else.

Next, you are not alone, and you do have accountability partners - here at CF. As long as you post, you will get responses from us. Sometimes you will be encouraged and other times you might feel like someone is shaking their finger at you. Regardless, you will get love.

You are in a perfect place to receive great gifts from God. When God puts us in time-out, or grounds us, or takes away our privileges (as he does us all), we are left with no one but Him to look to - and He expects his children to acknowledge they were wrong, humble their hearts before him, and ask for forgiveness. He loves a child that wants to please him.

Use this time-out wisely. Read more of God's Word. Pray more. Seek CF friends for wise council. You will emerge from this a stronger and more mature individual.

Pray that God will teach you how to control your tongue! Seek to be Christ-like to ALL people - especially your teachers.

Love to you in Christ.
 
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Sploosh

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Thanks peace, just the verse that popped out to me was Ezra 10:4 (I like The Message version best), which comes after ALL of Israel had realized their sin, and put Ezra in-charge of 'righting their wrongs':
"Now get up, Ezra. Take charge—we're behind you. Don't back down."

And that's what I'm trying to live by for these next few weeks.


Again, thanks.
 
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singpeace

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Thanks peace, just the verse that popped out to me was Ezra 10:4 (I like The Message version best), which comes after ALL of Israel had realized their sin, and put Ezra in-charge of 'righting their wrongs':
"Now get up, Ezra. Take charge—we're behind you. Don't back down."

And that's what I'm trying to live by for these next few weeks.


Again, thanks.


Luke 10:19
Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you.
 
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AWorkInProgress

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Hey there bud,

As I am reading your post, I just sense the devil is beating you up from the inside out. I know this sort of attack well, for it was his favorite weapon to use on me.

You are a child of God, and just like a baby learning how to walk. You are going to make mistakes. You are going to fall on your face, quite a number of times. Remember though, this is all part of the growing process. Each time you fall or stumble, it is an opportunity for you to grow. To pick yourself back up and learn how you fell.

You already are humble to recognize what you did. Just as asking God and your "Paul" friend to forgive you. It is very important that you forgive yourself for the deed. When you don't forgive yourself, the devil who tempted you in the first place, will condemn you for what you did. Remember guilt comes from the devil, conviction comes from God. Devil will make you feel so horrible about yourself, yet he is the one who help get you there in the first place. The Lord on the other hand knows you are a child who is maturing into a strong man of God. And that is what the devil fears most, is you maturing and discovering your purpose in Jesus.

Lord is with you, even when your "Paul" friend is unreachable. The same Spirit that speaks through her, is living inside of you. Don't listen to the garbage of thoughts that rip you apart, but pray that the Lord will speak to you in the Spirit and in His Word.

Galatians 5:16-26 (NLT) (emphases added)
16 So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. 17 The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, so you are not free to carry out your good intentions. 18 But when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses.

19 When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, 21 envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

22 But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!

24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. 25 Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives. 26 Let us not become conceited, or provoke one another, or be jealous of one another.

There is a war going on inside your heart, and Paul helps to describe it. Learn to listen to the Holy Spirit, and allow him to guide you. The Holy Spirit will lead you into the truth, and always cry out for understanding.

Hang in there, and remember to forgive yourself. If you don't know how, pray for the Lord to help give you the strength to. =)
 
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espo

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Its also a good lesson in reaping what we sow. Your math teacher is a human being that your God, your Jesus Christ loves too. Ya, move on from here but dont forget that your actions will always be followed by a re-action. 16 is a good age to learn that.

One other thing I would like add and I learnt this the hard way, God gives us a long rope and when we sin, we can ask and are forgiven but the consequences of that sin is still alive. We live through it and with it.
 
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If Not For Grace

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Good points from everybody-but maybe one thing you can do is write "Paul" a couple of letters (handwritten preferably) letting her know just what a positive she has been in your life that you can give her once this period "has passed".

I'm sure "Paul" has missed you too & it might be something she would like to keep for later should she ever go thru a down time & need a pick me up. :)
 
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