I wanted to send this in PM, but I can't yet and I really didn't want to derail the thread any more so I won't respond to anything other than PM's on this derailment
All of this amounts to the same things I've said. I don't hold you responsible, you should feel completely blameless for this. It is my own inadequsies (never could spell that one either) and past that causes me to cringe at references to immaturity.
but that is the point, to refer to someone as my child, does NOT infer they are immature, especially when I am 50 and the likelihood of my children all being adults is high, a reference to my children would be identification of who they are, not their maturity level. It's all about context I guess.
There is no way you could have known that. I would hope as a compassionate Christian you would be concerned if someone has taken offence to your words, which you did and apologized. You are absolutely correct that it's not really about the conciseness of communication it's about the content. I was simply trying to ask you in a nice way not to relate immaturity or likeness to children in relation to me at all even remotely.
look I will try to remember, though I could easily forget, but you also need to remember that the word children is not only used as a statement of maturity, but also a statement of identification.
I'm new here and you did indeed specify that they liked this type of discussion, but you then followed it with a "but I" which also can be considered a tad sanctimonious.
I don't know how...if my children like spagetti, but I like pizza, how is it sanctimonious to state? It just doesn't follow. It is a difference in likes and dislikes, nothing more, nothing less.
When the bottom line is none of the sentence needed to be there at all, it serves no purpose and it makes me feel uncomfortable.
so now complimenting someone is wrong, not loving. One of the biggest problems I have with CF is the desire of so many to be offended rather than to communicate. I got reported and warned for accepting someones apology. for reminding someone to make sure they had the guilty party before executing them for a crime, etc. etc. etc. Heck, I got in trouble one time for asking it anyone had been before a holy God and allowed that God to blow away all the chaff in their lives. If these are things that you want to be offended by, I'm not sure the CF is a good place for you. In your case, I'm really not sure what the big deal is. If you have an emotionally negative response to something, you might want to bull back and relax before commenting about it in a forum like this. I know people on this forums that would eat you alive just because they could. It's a pretty evil place all in all, full of people who don't care who they hurt or how they hurt them. When you come to me and say, this hurts, I will try to refrain, though admittedly I am likely to forget. But there are others who lurk the waters of CF that would and will use it to insight you to an emotional response so that they can riducule you and your ideas and assasinate you. If you can't deal with that, words to the wise, either leave the forums or be extremely cautionous where you go.
Case in point, recently we lost our second son, I was in a debate in which I made a comment about another topic. The reply begged me to an emotional response. I refused to do an emotional response because of already raw emotions and told them why I refused. The onslot of aggressive emotional attacks was out of control and one person was so upset by the attacks that they stepped in to try to help. The attacks continued until the thread was closed. My point is this, if my compliment and admiration of your thinking style, is this big a deal, you will be assasinated on the forums if you don't stick to something extremely mild, like the game rooms, and even then, watch your back...just a friendly warning.
It wasn't your fault, you didn't know, so you shouldn't feel guilty. It's not about who was right or wrong, if anyone was it was me for not communicating my issues clearly. I truly appreciate your blessings and thoughts on the subject. My soul's condition however is my responsibility, not yours and I place it in Jesus' hands every day. I hope this doesn't distance us any more, I'm not here to ruffle feathers just talk about Christianity, but I thought in the interst of future conversations I could let you know about some things that make me uncomfortable.
as I said, I will try to be aware in the future, but I don't always check the icons before posting and so could forget, it is not intentional I assure you. Much as you must not have noticed my age before becoming offended.
I didn't tell you thos things to make you feel guilty because I wasn't offended, I just had a knee-jerk reaction, and wanted to have calm and peacefull discussions here. Thank you for your continued attention in this matter, but it was purely informational. I've spent far too much time on this matter that's keeping me from viewing other sections of the website. I hope that this doesn't upset you to the point you're going to ignore some one. In fact I wish you many blessings in your life.
If you want to PM more about this, let me know and I will send you a PM, you should be able to respond to that PM and maybe, talking will help some, I have a good deal of experience with my own negative emotional responses, especially with our sons deal being so fresh in our mind and hearts and I have learned much about Gods' way to heal from those attacks. (not claiming to be an expert, just offering some time to talk if you want)
