Okay I have been smoking since before I was 18. I am one of the worst chain smokers you have ever met. I just can't believe it's gotten as bad as it has.
Today, I was looking at some old wal-mart cards I had and I had just enough to go buy a pack of cigarettes. I went into wal-mart and I got in line and when it was my turn the lady asked for my I.D. and I looked and I couldn't find it. So she just asked my date of birth so I told her and she entered it well the machine messed up and she had to have a manager come over and fix and then he asked for I.D. and we told him that I didn't have it and then he wouldn't sell me the cigarettes. So I left and I was really [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth]ed I got to my car and I couldn't get the door unlocked which happens a lot cause it gets stuck. So I kicked the car! I got in my car and automatically I started crying... I was just bawling... I sat there probably close to 30mins just crying my eyes out... I looked in my purse and found my I.D. so I went back and bought the cigarettes and after that everything was fine.
Seriously, I have never cried because I didn't have cigarettes. I mean I don't have a lot of money and especially right now I am in between pay checks so I am really broke. But I didn't realize my addiction had gotten so bad! I just don't know what to do. I hate it when I run out and then I get a little irrated but I have never kicked my car or anything else... and I have never bawled about it... I am just afraid of whats going to happen next. Am I going to break something? hurt myself? hurt someone else? It truly scares me.
Today, I was looking at some old wal-mart cards I had and I had just enough to go buy a pack of cigarettes. I went into wal-mart and I got in line and when it was my turn the lady asked for my I.D. and I looked and I couldn't find it. So she just asked my date of birth so I told her and she entered it well the machine messed up and she had to have a manager come over and fix and then he asked for I.D. and we told him that I didn't have it and then he wouldn't sell me the cigarettes. So I left and I was really [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth]ed I got to my car and I couldn't get the door unlocked which happens a lot cause it gets stuck. So I kicked the car! I got in my car and automatically I started crying... I was just bawling... I sat there probably close to 30mins just crying my eyes out... I looked in my purse and found my I.D. so I went back and bought the cigarettes and after that everything was fine.
Seriously, I have never cried because I didn't have cigarettes. I mean I don't have a lot of money and especially right now I am in between pay checks so I am really broke. But I didn't realize my addiction had gotten so bad! I just don't know what to do. I hate it when I run out and then I get a little irrated but I have never kicked my car or anything else... and I have never bawled about it... I am just afraid of whats going to happen next. Am I going to break something? hurt myself? hurt someone else? It truly scares me.