It's Always The Same.

Amin · Nov 9, 2006

Ya know,
It's always the same. I have good days, When I'm upbeat for a while, then as usual I'm right back to being depressed again. It seems to be a cycle that's going to repeat itself over, and over, and over, again. I'm honestly beginning to believe there isn't an end to this stuff, just some
days that are better than others.
And you wonder why i say" What difference does it make " Chuck.

Frangible · Nov 9, 2006

That is very true. Emotions do run in cycles, and some days are better than others. However, this is actually a good sign... because it means depression does not rule every day you have. That isn't quite freedom from depression, but it's certainly better than nothing other than depression.

And it makes a tremendous difference. Not just in being free from depression-- if only on some days, for yourself, but for people around you. Perhaps it won't change the cosmos, or get you a statue inscribed "Ozymandius, king of kings", but on a good day if you are able to reach out and give someone else a little happiness, help them to have a good day-- or even an animal-- you have made a difference on that day. And it means something.

Not only to that person, but if they were inspired by your action to do the same for another, to yet another person as well. One action has the potential to create a very large difference, to change things for the better, for many people, even if you do not see it.

And I can think of many times in my life when I was having a bad day, and someone reached out to me, and helped turn it around.

Amin · Nov 10, 2006

Frangible said:
That is very true. Emotions do run in cycles, and some days are better than others. However, this is actually a good sign... because it means depression does not rule every day you have. That isn't quite freedom from depression, but it's certainly better than nothing other than depression.

And it makes a tremendous difference. Not just in being free from depression-- if only on some days, for yourself, but for people around you. Perhaps it won't change the cosmos, or get you a statue inscribed "Ozymandius, king of kings", but on a good day if you are able to reach out and give someone else a little happiness, help them to have a good day-- or even an animal-- you have made a difference on that day. And it means something.

Not only to that person, but if they were inspired by your action to do the same for another, to yet another person as well. One action has the potential to create a very large difference, to change things for the better, for many people, even if you do not see it.

And I can think of many times in my life when I was having a bad day, and someone reached out to me, and helped turn it around.

I agree with everything you say, and i do help people and i love animals.Helping people seems to just be something i do. It doesn't seem special. I feel as tho it's something we should do in life.
Chuck.

Silver-winged Flyer · Nov 10, 2006

Amin said:
I agree with everything you say,
and i do help people and i love animals.Helping people seems to just be something i do. It doesn't seem special. I feel as tho it's something we should do in life.
Chuck.

You mean so much to me, you'll never know. Its such good to know that every day I'll have a message from you even if its short. Whenever I have a problem you always have good advice and you are always supportive and understanding. I'm so sorry you're feeling bad again. There is hope and when you feel depressed you might feel like life will never get better, but you have made my life so much better since I met you, I wish I could do the same for you. I would do anything to take your depression away.

Amin · Nov 10, 2006

TLB said:
You mean so much to me, you'll never know. Its such good to know that every day I'll have a message from you even if its short. Whenever I have a problem you always have good advice and you are always supportive and understanding. I'm so sorry you're feeling bad again. There is hope and when you feel depressed you might feel like life will never get better, but you have made my life so much better since I met you, I wish I could do the same for you. I would do anything to take your depression away.

Hi T.,
You mean a lot to me also. Maybe I'm just having a bad week. Whatever it is, it's good to know you care and are willing to help. That means a lot. Thanks T.
Chuck.

Silver-winged Flyer · Nov 10, 2006

Amin said:
Hi T.,
You mean a lot to me also. Maybe I'm just having a bad week. Whatever it is, it's good to know you care and are willing to help. That means a lot. Thanks T.
Chuck.

I'm always willing to help but I can't help if I don't know there's a problem.

Amin · Nov 10, 2006

TLB said:
I'm always willing to help but I can't help if I don't know there's a problem.

Hi T.
Yeah, I know. Sometimes i keep things in until they realy bother me.

burn97 · Nov 10, 2006

Hello Chuck. I've read so many of your posts, but I've never said hi.
I too go through what you do. Somedays, I'm upbeat,
I'm happy, I think that I've gotten better, then for no reason at all it seems, I'm back to where I've started. What I've come to the realization of though, through God's help, is little by little, I am getting better. God has promised, and He is Faithful, that He will take this pain, this fear, this depression, from us, but so that we can't boast of our own hand, it's going to be at His perfect time. Through depression, I've found that God is peeling away the traits that I shouldn't have, like pride and such, and is replacing it with compassion and dependance on Him. At the first sign of depression, I no longer try to figure out why I'm depressed, or what events could have lead to it, or things such as that, but I cry out to God. And though it may be an hour, a day, a week, a month, even a year or more, He takes it away. And in the process He is giving me characteristics that I never had before, He's building my character at the same time He's helping me.
An example would be, where I had pride, He's made me humble. (He's still working on that one, sometimes I gotta get knocked down a few pegs, )
I've gone from self-righteous to compassionate (again, still a work in process.)
But that's what we are, a work in progress. And God has promised that He will not stop until we are complete, not in our eyes, but in His. I've found during these times to draw closer to God, and wait for His deliverance. And sometimes that is really tough, for the pain is overwhelming, but the relief always comes, and it always comes from His Hand.
's
Jennifer

Amin · Nov 10, 2006

burn97 said:
Hello Chuck. I've read so many of your posts, but I've never said hi.
I too go through what you do. Somedays, I'm upbeat,
I'm happy, I think that I've gotten better, then for no reason at all it seems, I'm back to where I've started. What I've come to the realization of though, through God's help, is little by little, I am getting better. God has promised, and He is Faithful, that He will take this pain, this fear, this depression, from us, but so that we can't boast of our own hand, it's going to be at His perfect time. Through depression, I've found that God is peeling away the traits that I shouldn't have, like pride and such, and is replacing it with compassion and dependance on Him. At the first sign of depression, I no longer try to figure out why I'm depressed, or what events could have lead to it, or things such as that, but I cry out to God. And though it may be an hour, a day, a week, a month, even a year or more, He takes it away. And in the process He is giving me characteristics that I never had before, He's building my character at the same time He's helping me.
An example would be, where I had pride, He's made me humble. (He's still working on that one, sometimes I gotta get knocked down a few pegs, )
I've gone from self-righteous to compassionate (again, still a work in process.)
But that's what we are, a work in progress. And God has promised that He will not stop until we are complete, not in our eyes, but in His. I've found during these times to draw closer to God, and wait for His deliverance. And sometimes that is really tough, for the pain is overwhelming, but the relief always comes, and it always comes from His Hand.
's
Jennifer

Hi, Jennifer,
I thought i might be the only one. The big difference is my depression has taken me farther away from God instead of closer.Through depression, I've found that God is peeling away the traits that I shouldn't have, like pride and such, and is replacing it with compassion and dependance on Him. This is what's happening to you.
For me i find myself going back to some of my old habits
because they seem to get me thru the nite so to say.
I know i shouldn't be doing it, but now it's hard to stop.
One good thing, I haven't taken up all my bad habits , just a few, but even that's too many. It's causing me to feel distanced from God, but i know it's my fault, but i don't know how to stop. That's why I've started the sentence prayers to try and get back where i belong.
Chuck.

.chrys. · Nov 10, 2006

Amin said:
I agree with everything you say, and i do help people and i love animals.Helping people seems to just be something i do. It doesn't seem special. I feel as tho it's something we should do in life.
Chuck.

Hi Chuck!

One of the hardest things to learn in therapy sessions is to "help other people by FIRST helping ourselves". This is the hardest thing for me anyway--not saying that it is for you.

I've always thought (and still do) that helping others IS what we SHOULD do in life. But, when I find that I'm most depressed is when I'm helping others and neglecting myself. I often feel depressed because I'm always the giver and (seems like) never the givee.

Anyway. Not sure what message I'm trying to get across here other than, "Yeah. I know what you're sayin'. I feel for you, and I hope that today is a better day than yesterday."

Oh, and one more thing: thank you for being a blessing to me!!

~Witness

Amin · Nov 10, 2006

ConstantWitness said:
Hi Chuck!

One of the hardest things to learn in therapy sessions is to "help other people by FIRST helping ourselves". This is the hardest thing for me anyway--not saying that it is for you.

I've always thought (and still do) that helping others IS what we SHOULD do in life. But, when I find that I'm most depressed is when I'm helping others and neglecting myself. I often feel depressed because I'm always the giver and (seems like) never the givee.

Anyway. Not sure what message I'm trying to get across here other than, "Yeah. I know what you're sayin'. I feel for you, and I hope that today is a better day than yesterday."

Oh, and one more thing: thank you for being a blessing to me!!

~Witness

Hi Witness,
I understand what you're trying to say. I'm the kind of person that would literally give someone the shirt off of their back. You're right tho. It seems like I'm always doing things for others, but I'm more the giver than the givee. I've been the giver for so long that I don't know how to react when someone wants to do something for me. My own brother does this to me. I've helped him numerous times in numerous ways, then he'll go for months and not even talk to me. Go figure. I don't understand it.
Chuck.

MadeFromScratch · Nov 10, 2006

Chuck, the more you post, the more I think I can understand what is really eating at you.

People may not appreciate what we do. We work hard for our boss and get no recognition. We work hard at home and never seem to get anywhere. We go out of our way to help someone and they don't even seem to notice. We see all the injustices - the total jerk who just got some great and wonderful thing. The lazy bum who won the lottery.

Am I close?

Amin · Nov 10, 2006

MadeFromScratch said:
Chuck, the more you post, the more I think I can understand what is really eating at you.

People may not appreciate what we do. We work hard for our boss and get no recognition. We work hard at home and never seem to get anywhere. We go out of our way to help someone and they don't even seem to notice. We see all the injustices - the total jerk who just got some great and wonderful thing. The lazy bum who won the lottery.

Am I close?

Hi, Yeah,you're getting pretty close. That's definitely part of it. I have this other thing that bothers me too, but i can't really talk about it. I've paid for two homes, numerous cars, help people every chance i get. I've done a lot of things in my life, some of them not so good, some were. Knowing this, I still feel like i haven't achieved much at all. Some of it has to do with the part that i just can't talk about. All that said, I feel like an alien in my own world. It's to say the least a mixed up mess. I'd like to fix it, but I'm back where i started.
My original post. I have started sentence prayers tho.
Chuck.

Silver-winged Flyer · Nov 11, 2006

Amin said:
Hi, Yeah,you're getting pretty close. That's definitely part of it. I have this other thing that bothers me too, but i can't really talk about it. I've paid for two homes, numerous cars, help people every chance i get. I've done a lot of things in my life, some of them not so good, some were. Knowing this, I still feel like i haven't achieved much at all. Some of it has to do with the part that i just can't talk about. All that said, I feel like an alien in my own world. It's to say the least a mixed up mess. I'd like to fix it, but I'm back where i started.
My original post. I have started sentence prayers tho.
Chuck.

Hi Chuck

I don't know how to tell you how much I appreciate you. I don't know where I'd be without you. I know I haven't been there for you as much as I should, my problems always seem to take centre stage but maybe its because I don't know how to help you.

I'm really sorry.

T.

Amin · Nov 11, 2006

TLB said:
Hi Chuck

I don't know how to tell you how much I appreciate you. I don't know where I'd be without you. I know I haven't been there for you as much as I should, my problems always seem to take centre stage but maybe its because I don't know how to help you.

I'm really sorry.

T.

Hi T.
That's okay. Just knowing you're my friend, and knowing that you care is all anyone could ask for.
Thanks.
Chuck.

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