Isn't it wrong to encourage someone who is trying to break up your marriage to get an abortion?

[dms1972]

Sounds like she is bent idolatrously towards her husband. They both needs professional christian counselling (if they intend to stay together), or else to separate. Obviously I don't know the people you refer to. If they belong to a church, the leaders probably should have applied some sort of firm and loving discipline on the compulsively unfaithful husband and offered them counselling or refered them to someone with more experience if needed. The wife sounds like she effectively enables her husband who is also addicted to this other woman, or sex, or both. Love is a Choice (Hemfelt, Meier, Minirth) is a good book on the subject.

I don't agree with faciliating an abortion. It should have been left in God's hand's whether the baby was born.

 

[BNR32FAN]

I'm saying like say a husband is unfaithful for years with another woman and gets her pregnant and plans to leave wife. But the wife makes the other woman have an abortion? I have a friend who I sided with have this happen. But among us were all prolife so I thought. She feared her husband would leave her so she encouraged and made sure the other woman had an abortion so her husband would stay with her and he ended up staying with her. The thing is I don't like the other woman either she seems like a terrible homewrecker who hates the wife and really works hard at destroying their family and marriage and she was going to use her pregnancy as a way to split up their marriage. I think this is a major reason she encouraged her to abort because of that. But also it doesn't sit well with me that she facilitated in someone terminating their pregnancy. She justifies it by saying that the woman is obviously a very immoral and disgusting person that she's trying to break up her family. She's simply "trying to protect" her family. And that women like that are equal to women who get abortions and she basically deserved to have her pregnancy terminated because of how bad of a person she is. It's only the consequences of her actions. I still feel like outside of the terrible woman. there was a child that had nothing to do with it. That's why I don't like my friend because she doesn't seem Christian but beguiled by desperation. But anyway am I judgmental and is it wrong that I cut her off as of lately? Advice?


Also the other woman ended her pregnancy like 4 months ago but doesn't seem to have helped my friend completely because her husband stayed with the wife but he still cheats with that mess of a woman so I've heard. The woman he cheats with really hates the wife now more than before. You know nothing good can come out of bad. I think maybe a divorce would help her find a man worth marrying. If she was a good Christian she'd have left him by now

Sounds like everyone involved was in the wrong and need to repent and ask for forgiveness.

 

[Beanieboy]

Let me understand this: your concern is with the wife encouraging the other woman to have an abortion, rather than the husband cheating?

Let's say the other woman has the baby. The husband is now financially obligated to provide alimony.

There is no easy answer, but I'm wondering how desparate a wife you have to beat to fight for a husband that isn't faithful.

 

[Strong in Him]

I'm saying like say a husband is unfaithful for years with another woman and gets her pregnant and plans to leave wife. But the wife makes the other woman have an abortion?

No one should make a woman have an abortion.

She feared her husband would leave her so she encouraged and made sure the other woman had an abortion so her husband would stay with her and he ended up staying with her.

It seems she felt insecure and wanted to make sure that her husband stayed with her.
It could have backfired - the husband may have left her and/or resented her for being the cause of the death of his child.

The thing is I don't like the other woman either she seems like a terrible homewrecker who hates the wife and really works hard at destroying their family and marriage and she was going to use her pregnancy as a way to split up their marriage.

I'm not sure your feelings about the other woman should come into it; it's between them.
If you are trying to support the wife, be there for her and listen, comfort and help her to discover her options - you don't have to take sides and like/hate one or the other.

She's simply "trying to protect" her family. And that women like that are equal to women who get abortions and she basically deserved to have her pregnancy terminated because of how bad of a person she is.

Making someone get an abortion, depriving a woman of her child and her own children of their half brother or sister, is not the action of a good person.

That's why I don't like my friend because she doesn't seem Christian but beguiled by desperation. But anyway am I judgmental and is it wrong that I cut her off as of lately? Advice?

I can understand you being horrified by/uncomfortable with your friend's actions - but it's possible to hate the sin but love the sinner. God does.

Also the other woman ended her pregnancy like 4 months ago but doesn't seem to have helped my friend completely because her husband stayed with the wife but he still cheats with that mess of a woman so I've heard.

The problem wasn't the baby; the problem was the husband's inability to remember his marriage vows and be faithful. The wife thought that by getting rid of the fruit of the affair (child) she would solve the root of the affair. She hasn't.
If she wants him back, even after everything, she needs to talk to him, properly - and be ready to listen to the reasons he started the affair and how he feels. Then, if both are willing, they can start to do something about it.

The woman he cheats with really hates the wife now more than before.

Not surprisingly - although ultimately she agreed to an abortion.

I think maybe a divorce would help her find a man worth marrying. If she was a good Christian she'd have left him by now

If she was stronger, had greater self esteem and practical and financial help; she might have.

 

[Sketcher]

I'm saying like say a husband is unfaithful for years with another woman and gets her pregnant and plans to leave wife. But the wife makes the other woman have an abortion? I have a friend who I sided with have this happen. But among us were all prolife so I thought. She feared her husband would leave her so she encouraged and made sure the other woman had an abortion so her husband would stay with her and he ended up staying with her. The thing is I don't like the other woman either she seems like a terrible homewrecker who hates the wife and really works hard at destroying their family and marriage and she was going to use her pregnancy as a way to split up their marriage. I think this is a major reason she encouraged her to abort because of that. But also it doesn't sit well with me that she facilitated in someone terminating their pregnancy. She justifies it by saying that the woman is obviously a very immoral and disgusting person that she's trying to break up her family. She's simply "trying to protect" her family. And that women like that are equal to women who get abortions and she basically deserved to have her pregnancy terminated because of how bad of a person she is. It's only the consequences of her actions. I still feel like outside of the terrible woman. there was a child that had nothing to do with it. That's why I don't like my friend because she doesn't seem Christian but beguiled by desperation. But anyway am I judgmental and is it wrong that I cut her off as of lately? Advice?


Also the other woman ended her pregnancy like 4 months ago but doesn't seem to have helped my friend completely because her husband stayed with the wife but he still cheats with that mess of a woman so I've heard. The woman he cheats with really hates the wife now more than before. You know nothing good can come out of bad. I think maybe a divorce would help her find a man worth marrying. If she was a good Christian she'd have left him by now

Like she literally bullied her at work and threatened her job and paid for her to get the abortion etc .... She specifically pointed out it was murder but that that was what the other woman deserved because she was a terrible person for getting an abortion and cheating with her husband which she is most certainly terrible I'd say her husband is too and she fought so hard for him that she's lost her own values

This was an effort to punish the other woman. It's textbook revenge. Revenge is forbidden.

All three of these adults are terrible people.

 

[lismore]

Isn't it wrong to encourage someone who is trying to break up your marriage to get an abortion?

It seems that the one who was killed was the least guilty in this situation.

 

[rebornfree]

Yes, abortion is wrong, as is unfaithfulness. However none of us are perfect, so while we can acknowledge that the actions are wrong I would be careful of judging the person. I understand that it must make it a difficult work situation for you, but I wouldn't label anyone a terrible person; you may not know what they have been through and only God can judge someone's heart. Don't support the sin, but try to show the love of Christ to the people. You want them to be saved, if unsaved, or to walk the right way with the Lord if they are saved. The love of the Lord Jesus is available to them if they would repent (as we all have to).