is this ocd?

[Ragheb]

well i started to have this 5 years ago.. i kind of have thoughts that are urging, probably wanting me to do something.. like for example that i'm not totally surrendering my life to God... and it urges me to start to over think the issue and if im really not totally surrendering to him.. then i would say to myself no thats not right.. and then i would start to get urging thoughts again that i m not... that i have to pray now and give him my life.. and its like that i do this maybe dozens of times..

but inside of me i feel these thoughts are all not true! but i can't stop them, it kind of convinces me everytime it comes...and its in many things not just spiritual things..

also when i start to play sports, for example some home exercises, as push-ups or pull-ups.. it starts by a thought that i won't be able to benefit from the exercise... and then i would start to adjust my positions as i practice to ensure that i do the right move.. and at the end i find that i didnt benefit from the exercise.. like i didnt feel any effort of even my muscles being tougher... and i would start to do the exercise dozens of time while trying to adjust the position.. and its never beneficial.. i feel as if i lost a lot of weight!

its the same when i play anything, when this thoughts start to come, in tennis for example, i find most of the balls in the net, and then i start to focus on my style or positions.. its really intrusive thoughts..

sometimes i even cant stop thinking the whole day, trying or searching for an answer for a question whether i am saved or not, whether i totally surrender my life to God or not.. whether i should play with this style or this one..

sometimes im with my friends and we are talking, but i have this urge to think and find an answer to settle something in my mind.. so i start to think when they are talking to me!

i want to know what is iths? i keep asking God but i dont see a change!

 

[smith1]

This sounds an awful lot like my OCD sounds. You should go and find a Christian therapist who can check you out and properly diagnose and treat your problem. Don't just let it keep going unchecked.

 

[Ragheb]

so do you have the same things exactly? what do your look like?

 

[smith1]

I have different thoughts but the insistence is the same. Over and over again my stupid OCD tells me something that I know is a lie is a total truth and that I'm just trying to convince myself of a lie when I refuse to believe the lie that OCD tells. My OCD tells me I'm a sicko, even though I know I'm not. And it really feels like what the OCD tells me is true. I just have to let my knowledge and trust in the truth I know overpower the lie I feel. Also, exercise is really hard for me too. I derive very little benefit from it because my mind is too busy messing with me for it to truly work as it's supposed to. And I often get distracted while people are talking to me because I get busy thinking about something else or some stupid OCD theme. I hate it! I feel so bad when that happens because I want to be a good listener but can't seem to be. I have impulses that disrupt my prayers too. It's as if I have to be completely focused on spiritual things while praying or else my prayer won't be acceptable. I've spent extra time I don't know how many times repeating the same words over and over again because my stupid OCD tells me I didn't say it with the right feeling so I had to do it again or I would be sinning. I hate OCD. But it is real and has to be acknowledged and dealt with.

 

[Ragheb]

well i feel that you are talking in my place.. everything single sentence you wrote is exactly my condition! and it's really something crazy! i hate all this.. but where is the way out of this place? what should we do, do we have a role or we just wait on God that he liberates us in his time? and if it is his role, what is he waiting for?

 

[flowerforever7]

@ Ragheb - First of all I empathize with some of the struggles you have. I battle with severe OCD. OCD is a neurobiological disorder with evidence suggesting it is the result of a genetic mutation. God created everything good, however there are a lot of things that we have done as a human race to cause it to break down. For example, there are a lot of substances and chemicals dumped into our water, air and food supplies that end up causing harmful genetic mutations in our bodies. God did not tell anyone to dump a bunch of harmful chemicals in what we consume. I consider disorders resulting from harmful genetic mutations a natural consequence of humans not following what God teaches in the Bible "love your neighbor as you love yourself. If they did, they wouldn't put other people at risk in order to make or save a buck by putting chemicals that are potentially harmful into our food, water and air supplies. It just serves as a reminder to me how much humanity needs to follow God's way. This is a world where fallen imperfect things take place because people choose not to follow God. However, it is a temporary place and if we stay faithful to God during our temporary journey here, we will get to be with Him in eternity where there is no suffering or pain any longer (in our case battles with OCD). Stay faithful & God bless.

_________________
Acts 2:38 "And Peter said, "Repent and be baptized everyone of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."

 

[Ragheb]

yea flowerforever7 but this means that there is no hope in this life! only in heaven when we leave our earthly tents will we experience this freedom! and Jesus came to heal every sickness! so how do you think that we have to live with this crazy thing throughout all our lives on earth? if Jesus heals all sorts of diseases, so he will do the same in our case! and in other words how is it possible that it is God's will for us to live with this thing throughout all our lives when he have the cure?

 

[smith1]

Hi Ragheb! I, like you, hold out hope that there is or will be a cure found for this illness. I am continuing to research and try out new things in hopes of finding a cure. I can already tell a huge difference in my symptoms from the time when they first started showing really badly. It is my faith that has enabled me to be sustained by God through all this time though. Don't forget that sometimes God has a specific plan for your troubles so that they can help you spiritually somehow. It may not yet be the right time for God to lift our troubles from us. Maybe we need to wait a while longer. But I also keep in my mind that God has made a way for me to endure my illness even if I have to live with it for a long time. He will heal me eventually, but I can endure and live even now because of his strength, love, mercy and help. To tell the truth, I would not even have found out that this is the illness that I have if I had not been led by God's Holy Spirit to the answer. So don't lose hope! It may be that you and I and other brothers and sisters who suffer with this illness may have to endure it for a while, but someday---either in this life or in the next one---God WILL heal us from it. Never give up!

 

[Ragheb]

well i agree with you, but i see how God heals many people around me from various diseases! so this gives me hope that there would be a healing one day, before heaven! i understand that this maybe God's will for me to endure this to produce spiritual benefit but you know some days it's really horrible! actually most of the days, so i don't understand god's will in this, in this suffering! i think that he may leave something in us that we can bear but really some days i can't bear, so what is the point when it is like this! i feel i'm chained in most of the activities i do, even my relationship with God is affected! i don't enjoy anything i do, so how can this be even his way to teach me something?! i keep pleading with God to guide me to what's wrong! but i never get an answer. i have never been diagnosed with ocd (cuz i havent visited any psychiatrist)but when i read about it, i think that this is the exact things i pass through! and when i read people's posts, it's as if it is me who wrote it!

 

[Ragheb]

you know, if for example you have a physical disease, i can understand that God wants to teach us something through it, because though you are physically limited or suffering, your inside is enjoying the walk with the Lord and is enjoying his love, mercy and life in general.. but it's not the case with ocd (with me), it's very hard almost impossible to enjoy anything! even the walk with the Lord is affected! i think it took from me all joy, passion, it's consuming!well im really confused..

 

[smith1]

Ragheb, you really need to find a good psychiatrist (especially if you can find a Christian psychiatrist) as well as a good Christian counselor and start going through therapy. Medication and therapy have helped me begin to enjoy life again. God has taught me many things through my struggle with ocd and I continue to learn because I continue to struggle. Also, I might recommend reading a book called Brain Lock. It has a helpful strategy for you to give therapy to yourself for ocd. Never give up, my brother, God will save you in some way or maybe through many ways!

 

[earagun]

I have different thoughts but the insistence is the same. Over and over again my stupid OCD tells me something that I know is a lie is a total truth and that I'm just trying to convince myself of a lie when I refuse to believe the lie that OCD tells. My OCD tells me I'm a sicko, even though I know I'm not. And it really feels like what the OCD tells me is true. I just have to let my knowledge and trust in the truth I know overpower the lie I feel. Also, exercise is really hard for me too. I derive very little benefit from it because my mind is too busy messing with me for it to truly work as it's supposed to. And I often get distracted while people are talking to me because I get busy thinking about something else or some stupid OCD theme. I hate it! I feel so bad when that happens because I want to be a good listener but can't seem to be. I have impulses that disrupt my prayers too. It's as if I have to be completely focused on spiritual things while praying or else my prayer won't be acceptable. I've spent extra time I don't know how many times repeating the same words over and over again because my stupid OCD tells me I didn't say it with the right feeling so I had to do it again or I would be sinning. I hate OCD. But it is real and has to be acknowledged and dealt with.

one thing I've noticed about many of you folks that have this thing called OCD.....(to me its simple demonic oppression) is you realize that the thoughts and this internal voice is lying, its continually harrasing your mind, yet when I listen to you folks it quite apparent you keep responding and listening to this demonic spirit, I know all about the lies and false ideas these spirits can have and how they effect your life, rebuke these thoughts and false notions, and stop allowing these spirits to have any power in your life,rebuke them as lying spirits and then ignore them as if what they are saying and the thoughts they are planting are not even being registered, they thrive on your anxiety and fear, knowing they are successfully making you do somthing is what impowers them stop acknowledging them and there tactics to drive you crazy and they will go find an easier target, who is easily manipulated by mere thoughts and ideas. You already know that the thoughts and ideas are lies, treat them as lies, a lie has no power its what it is a lie, If I held an empty hand at you and said I'm going to shoot you with this gun, you would laugh because you can plainly see my hand is empty, and I have no gun. My lie has no power, its only when you believe the lie that it comes to life and actually begins to manipulate you to act. and this is their whole goal is to make you act, in the face of a lie............fought this battle and have successfully found these lying spirits who implant thoughts as if they were your own, sometimes even speaking in the voice you have reconized as your own internal voice, CAN BE BEATEN! by simply rebuking thoughts and ideas as a lie "I rebuke that thought in Jesus name, Its a lie! and then move on and don't believe the thought or idea.......Its a relentless battle at the begining, practically in constant rebuke.....but over time, Gods strength and power over rule their ability and when they stop getting a reaction or an acknowledgement that your being influenced by their lies they actually go away.......I very rarily even get the slightest attempt, as over time my ability to stop a lie at the threshold of my mind, is what keeps these lies from even getting any airtime in my thought process

 

[flowerforever7]

earagun,

I know you mean well; but I do not think you know very much about what is going on in the brains of people with OCD. OCD is a neurobiological disorder where there is a dysfunction in the circuitry of the brain, most likely caused by a genetic mutation and /or shown to be a result of lesions or damage to the basal ganglia in the brain. Brain scans show people with OCD have abnormalities in the brain that average people do not. People who have OCD do not want OCD. This is a neurological disorder that people suffer with. Traumatic brain injuries have been known to bring on OCD. People cannot help a brain dysfunction. I absolutely agree that people with OCD need to cling to God, read His Word, and trust His Word, especially with OCD.

I want to address a few more things in your post. Please understand I am not trying to put out your zeal or discourage you from posting on this forum, you should. But I do want to respectfully share some things with you, some of which I want to caution you in. You have made some claims in your post that are not verifiable in the Bible. As you know, people who meet on this forum are Christ followers. Those who have accepted Christ and are Christ followers have His Holy Spirit living inside of them (as the Bible says). Are you saying that those who have the Holy Spirit can also have a demonic spirit? There is nowhere in Scripture documenting that anyone who has the Holy Spirit can also have a demonic spirit inside of them too. You also said that someone's negative thoughts are a demonic spirit. You do not know this for certain about anybody; and it's a pretty bold thing to claim about a whole group of Christ followers whom you don't know. I understand you may not suffer with OCD, but repeatedly referring to us on this forum with OCD as "you folks" and then giving a rant seemed somewhat condescending to me. I know you are trying to help. OCD or not though, we are all peers. I am not trying to be rude to you, honest. What I want to do is encourage you to temper your zeal with more knowledge and gentleness. Biblical knowledge specifically I think is rightly discerned when proper context is considered (who is being addressed and why), along with proper hermeneutics and exegesis (actual meaning / intent of Scriptures read, and appropriate application); which I'm sure you agree is good. I also want to gently encourage you to research further to gain more insight on topics you want to post strongly on, (in this case it’s OCD).

Here are some links, so you can read more about what is happening physically in the brains of people with OCD:

OCD Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

What Causes OCD - College Students | OCD Chicago

International OCD Foundation (IOCDF)

Causes of OCD - What are the Main Causes of OCD

I am not trying to discourage you. I am not a moderator, just a member. However, I just want you to see the importance of adequate research and being considerate toward us here on the forum when posting.

_________
Acts 2:38 "Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, everyone of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."

 

[earagun]

earagun,

I know you mean well; but I do not think you know very much about what is going on in the brains of people with OCD. OCD is a neurobiological disorder where there is a dysfunction in the circuitry of the brain, most likely caused by a genetic mutation and /or shown to be a result of lesions or damage to the basal ganglia in the brain. Brain scans show people with OCD have abnormalities in the brain that average people do not. People who have OCD do not want OCD. This is a neurological disorder that people suffer with. Traumatic brain injuries have been known to bring on OCD. People cannot help a brain dysfunction. I absolutely agree that people with OCD need to cling to God, read His Word, and trust His Word, especially with OCD.

I want to address a few more things in your post. Please understand I am not trying to put out your zeal or discourage you from posting on this forum, you should. But I do want to respectfully share some things with you, some of which I want to caution you in. You have made some claims in your post that are not verifiable in the Bible. As you know, people who meet on this forum are Christ followers. Those who have accepted Christ and are Christ followers have His Holy Spirit living inside of them (as the Bible says). Are you saying that those who have the Holy Spirit can also have a demonic spirit? There is nowhere in Scripture documenting that anyone who has the Holy Spirit can also have a demonic spirit inside of them too. You also said that someone's negative thoughts are a demonic spirit. You do not know this for certain about anybody; and it's a pretty bold thing to claim about a whole group of Christ followers whom you don't know. I understand you may not suffer with OCD, but repeatedly referring to us on this forum with OCD as "you folks" and then giving a rant seemed somewhat condescending to me. I know you are trying to help. OCD or not though, we are all peers. I am not trying to be rude to you, honest. What I want to do is encourage you to temper your zeal with more knowledge and gentleness. Biblical knowledge specifically I think is rightly discerned when proper context is considered (who is being addressed and why), along with proper hermeneutics and exegesis (actual meaning / intent of Scriptures read, and appropriate application); which I'm sure you agree is good. I also want to gently encourage you to research further to gain more insight on topics you want to post strongly on, (in this case it’s OCD).

Here are some links, so you can read more about what is happening physically in the brains of people with OCD:

OCD Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

What Causes OCD - College Students | OCD Chicago

International OCD Foundation (IOCDF)

Causes of OCD - What are the Main Causes of OCD

I am not trying to discourage you. I am not a moderator, just a member. However, I just want you to see the importance of adequate research and being considerate toward us here on the forum when posting.

_________
Acts 2:38 "Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, everyone of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."

Well considering the medical world does not believe in demons, It would be the logical idea to make the evaluation of a brain disorder, but since I believe the bible and know quite a bit about demonic possession and oppression, as I once was one, I can tell you that the bible is true and every man is a liar that does not take what it says as being truth and that would include the medical world who has a whole list of excuses and long scientific sounding explainations for what people suffer from. As for your notion a Christian can not be demon possessed, I would have to say while huge blocks of Christianity teach this false doctrine we see plainly from the bible that this is not true. Judas Iscariot was an apostle, He was a disciple of Christ, he is listed as a apostle in the bible, He was sent out two by two and he along with the other disciples experienced what we see written in the scriptures, casting out demons, healing the sick, they were appointed by Jesus Himself and were given power (see Mathew 10, Mark 3:14-19 Mark 6:7-13) he was preaching the gospel, and was in charge of the money bag, which speaks of the trust he had with the other disciples, as any church is not going to put just anyone in charge of all the finances. Judas Iscariot was a Follower of Christ, He experienced the power of the Holy Spirit that is unmatched by most Christians today, he spent three years under the ministry and direction from Jesus Himself.................yet we see from scripture this man through greed opened the door, and was possessed by satan himself (see Luke 22:3) We can be sure of one thing, the bible is true, and whoever teaches what is contrary to this source is in error and the truth is not in them. I was a follower of Jesus when I was young, but I stopped glorifying God and things of this world became an idol to me, I traded the truth for a lie, and God gave me over to uncleaness, and I practiced all sorts of wickedness, drunkeness, and drugs, I joined my spirit with other spirits, through acts of sex, even practiced forms of witchcraft and channeling, and soon I found I was merely a human ouji being manipulated on the board of life, I couldn't tell anyone I was carrying evil spirits, because I was afraid of what they (the spirits) would do to me if I told..........the story is a long one but finally I was delivered of these evil spirits, and I literally heard them scream as they came out of me, screaming desperatly all the lies they had carefully methodically introduced into my heart and spirit over the years, It was then I realized the difference between the truth and what I was led to believe was a lie, and again the bible teaches this trading of truth for a lie in Roman's 1.......rebuking evil spirits is what the bible teaches for evil spirits that try to cause us trouble.....rebuke the devil and he will flee from you.........then again if your told there are no devils and you simply have a brain disorder, then I guess the biblical way is not applicable

 

[flowerforever7]

Well considering the medical world does not believe in demons, It would be the logical idea to make the evaluation of a brain disorder, but since I believe the bible and know quite a bit about demonic possession and oppression, as I once was one, I can tell you that the bible is true and every man is a liar that does not take what it says as being truth and that would include the medical world who has a whole list of excuses and long scientific sounding explainations for what people suffer from. As for your notion a Christian can not be demon possessed, I would have to say while huge blocks of Christianity teach this false doctrine we see plainly from the bible that this is not true. Judas Iscariot was an apostle, He was a disciple of Christ, he is listed as a apostle in the bible, He was sent out two by two and he along with the other disciples experienced what we see written in the scriptures, casting out demons, healing the sick, they were appointed by Jesus Himself and were given power (see Mathew 10, Mark 3:14-19 Mark 6:7-13) he was preaching the gospel, and was in charge of the money bag, which speaks of the trust he had with the other disciples, as any church is not going to put just anyone in charge of all the finances. Judas Iscariot was a Follower of Christ, He experienced the power of the Holy Spirit that is unmatched by most Christians today, he spent three years under the ministry and direction from Jesus Himself.................yet we see from scripture this man through greed opened the door, and was possessed by satan himself (see Luke 22:3) We can be sure of one thing, the bible is true, and whoever teaches what is contrary to this source is in error and the truth is not in them. I was a follower of Jesus when I was young, but I stopped glorifying God and things of this world became an idol to me, I traded the truth for a lie, and God gave me over to uncleaness, and I practiced all sorts of wickedness, drunkeness, and drugs, I joined my spirit with other spirits, through acts of sex, even practiced forms of witchcraft and channeling, and soon I found I was merely a human ouji being manipulated on the board of life, I couldn't tell anyone I was carrying evil spirits, because I was afraid of what they (the spirits) would do to me if I told..........the story is a long one but finally I was delivered of these evil spirits, and I literally heard them scream as they came out of me, screaming desperatly all the lies they had carefully methodically introduced into my heart and spirit over the years, It was then I realized the difference between the truth and what I was led to believe was a lie, and again the bible teaches this trading of truth for a lie in Roman's 1.......rebuking evil spirits is what the bible teaches for evil spirits that try to cause us trouble.....rebuke the devil and he will flee from you.........then again if your told there are no devils and you simply have a brain disorder, then I guess the biblical way is not applicable

earagun,

First of all, I never said the Bible is untrue. I am a staunch advocate of the Bible as I am a Christian; so please, I really hope you are not implying that I personally disbelieve the Bible or am promoting false doctrine, which I do believe the Bible, and I am not promoting false doctrine. I believe the Bible is true, yet I also believe that there is a reality here on this earth too. Part of that reality is that people have medical conditions, (proven by brain scans, blood tests, x-rays and so on.) I don't know why on earth you think that you can't believe medical reality and the Bible too, they are both reality and not in contradiction to one another. They are both true. OCD is a medical condition, just like Parkinson's disease, cancer, and diabetes is. There are many in the medical profession who are devout Christians who strongly believe the Bible yet also understand that real medical conditions do exist. They treat them by performing operations, and giving life saving or sustaining medical help. I know someone who is both a doctor and a Christian. Are you saying that all cancer or heart disease is just demonic oppression with no real medical grounds? Are you implying that all people in this world with diseases like terminal cancer have demonic oppression or would be totally physically healed if they just rebuke the devil? Am I saying that demonic oppression is not a possibility? Am I saying that it is wrong to rebuke the devil in a sincere heartfelt manner in attempt to be cured of cancer, OCD, heart disease? No, but the reality of it is that we have physical bodies with biological systems that can become dysfunctional in certain aspects (resulting in real disorders or real diseases) due to genetic mutations or degeneration of the physical systems our bodies and brains operate with. The reality is that, just as the Scriptures teach reality, so does fact in real life, and it is a fact that medical conditions exist. You are not all knowing like God so you cannot realistically know whether or nor someone's medical condition is caused by a demonic oppression or is just a plain medical condition due to the plethora of genetic mutations that occur in the human body at any given time, or the symptoms of a degeneration process of our physical bodies that are subject to degeneration due to the fact that they are physical and DO decay and break down in our material world.

________
Acts 2:38 "Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, everyone of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."

 

[earagun]

earagun,

First of all, I never said the Bible is untrue. I am a staunch advocate of the Bible as I am a Christian; so please, I really hope you are not implying that I personally disbelieve the Bible or am promoting false doctrine, which I do believe the Bible, and I am not promoting false doctrine. I believe the Bible is true, yet I also believe that there is a reality here on this earth too. Part of that reality is that people have medical conditions, (proven by brain scans, blood tests, x-rays and so on.) I don't know why on earth you think that you can't believe medical reality and the Bible too, they are both reality and not in contradiction to one another. They are both true. OCD is a medical condition, just like Parkinson's disease, cancer, and diabetes is. There are many in the medical profession who are devout Christians who strongly believe the Bible yet also understand that real medical conditions do exist. They treat them by performing operations, and giving life saving or sustaining medical help. I know someone who is both a doctor and a Christian. Are you saying that all cancer or heart disease is just demonic oppression with no real medical grounds? Are you implying that all people in this world with diseases like terminal cancer have demonic oppression or would be totally physically healed if they just rebuke the devil? Am I saying that demonic oppression is not a possibility? Am I saying that it is wrong to rebuke the devil in a sincere heartfelt manner in attempt to be cured of cancer, OCD, heart disease? No, but the reality of it is that we have physical bodies with biological systems that can become dysfunctional in certain aspects (resulting in real disorders or real diseases) due to genetic mutations or degeneration of the physical systems our bodies and brains operate with. The reality is that, just as the Scriptures teach reality, so does fact in real life, and it is a fact that medical conditions exist. You are not all knowing like God so you cannot realistically know whether or nor someone's medical condition is caused by a demonic oppression or is just a plain medical condition due to the plethora of genetic mutations that occur in the human body at any given time, or the symptoms of a degeneration process of our physical bodies that are subject to degeneration due to the fact that they are physical and DO decay and break down in our material world.

________
Acts 2:38 "Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, everyone of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."

don't read more into my words than simply what I have written, all I'm saying is this, the bible clearly states that a man who does not have the Holy Spirit can not understand Spiritual things, they are foolishness to him. clearly there are as you say Christian doctors, but as a whole the medical system does not reconize God or Jesus or the Holy Spirit as being real, thus they are limited as to what they can do, certianly if I broke my arm or had a heart attack I would go to the doctor and hospital, but if I'm hearing demonic voices telling me lies and causing great anxiety and confusion, I would head for someone who had the power and the faith to remove this entity from my life, since in general most medical practicioners do not believe in demonic oppression the best they could offer me is a medication that would merely dull my senses, and alleviate my anxiety through chemical manipulations, once off the drugs my demons would be right back, making my life miserable........and no not everything is demonic, I never said it was

 

[lilipunzel]

Freinds,
There is alot of hope. As a Christian and a therapist who specializes in OCD treatment I see most of my clients getting well. PLease find a Cognitive behavioral therapist who does Exposure response prevention. I know of very little else that works. Also please reda Stop OBsessing by Edna Foa .. That will help you to begin to understand the disorder.