Is there such a thing as a relaxed Christian?

[Anthony87]

Or is it simply just made up because that person or person/s do not want to follow such a strict set of rules?

Just curious....I have a Christian friend and she would not date me because she is Christian and I am Agnostic. Since then I have observed her and discussed her beliefs and she frequently labels herself a "relaxed Christian"...

So...for example she enjoys all types of music (Lady Gaga), goes to pubs and clubs frequently and drinks a fair bit (Tipsy and hyper) and dances with random guys....yet...I am not allowed to go swimming with her at a public place, go in her bedroom or a room with her without someone nearby (Parents rules). I don't get this relaxed Chrisitan thing...

You're either a Christian or not? Why go and bend the rules to suit yourself....

 

[Hakan101]

Why go and bend the rules to suit yourself....

It doesn't sound like her faith is very strong. She is likely bending the rules to suit herself because she does not want to change. The fact that she says she is taking a relaxed approach towards her faith goes to show how much she values God.

 

[evelyn3]

From what you describe, it sounds like your friend is "relaxed" regarding some things that some would stay away from. In other areas, like going swimming together, many believers wouldn't have a problem with that.

I think we all are guilty of this in some way or another. The problem is that if we truly believe that God is the creator of the universe, is all-powerful and all-wise, and that His commands are for our benefit, then what are we doing deciding which ones to obey and which to ignore?

What I'm trying to say is it's dangerous to pick and choose what part of God's word you will accept. Your question is well put: either you are a Christian or you're not. The Bible says we all sin and fall short of God's glory, which explains why we don't perfectly obey Him. But failures and errors are different than deliberate choices, especially if they involve behavior clearly out of line with Scripture (ie, getting tipsy).

 

[razeontherock]

She's obviously young, if she's talking about parent's rules. There's no doubt a lot she hasn't learned yet, and it's dangerous to go Judging others. Jesus is a good Shepherd, He knows what He's doing. And He's patient, gentle and kind ...

Christianity is really not a strict set of rules. It's more like a way to grow up to rise above the need for rules, which can never be just anyway.

 

[Lukaris]

I will guess that she is young & wants to have some fun but wants to remain chaste until marriage. If this is the situation, God bless her.

 

[AlexBP]

Based on what you've written, it sounds like this young lady is extremely intelligent, plans ahead, and sets boundaries for herself in an intelligent way.

 

[Anthony87]

I totally agree with her having fun all through out her life not just when she is young.

but...I find it a bit offensive that she is not allowed to go swimming with me or spend time in a room without someone near by, yet she will dance with random people at a club (without her parents knowing). She won't even tell her parents this....which surely is a sin?

...but ohhh yeah she has frequently said "If you sin....if you ask god for forgiveness then you will be forgiven.." ..

So basiacally you can sin all you like and you will still be fine ?

Makes Christianity pointless....

 

[Sadiegrl]

There is such a thing as being at peace...but that takes alot of self discipline and wisdom and faith...such things that come after pursuing God and learning what it is that really matters. We are always, everyday going to be a sinner...its whats in the heart and if that person has a healthy relationship and respect for God as we know him. We are all, christians and non, made in His image and carry some of His characteristics. But like all worthy things, the more you learn about and refine and improve the skill or knowledge, then comes wisdom and understanding. Many people are still young, even when they are old...spiritually.

 

[hedrick]

Or is it simply just made up because that person or person/s do not want to follow such a strict set of rules?

Just curious....I have a Christian friend and she would not date me because she is Christian and I am Agnostic. Since then I have observed her and discussed her beliefs and she frequently labels herself a "relaxed Christian"...

So...for example she enjoys all types of music (Lady Gaga), goes to pubs and clubs frequently and drinks a fair bit (Tipsy and hyper) and dances with random guys....yet...I am not allowed to go swimming with her at a public place, go in her bedroom or a room with her without someone nearby (Parents rules). I don't get this relaxed Chrisitan thing...

You're either a Christian or not? Why go and bend the rules to suit yourself....

Of course there are relaxed Christians, just like there are strict ones. Your friend sounds like she is actually relaxed. Jesus' teachings leave lots of room for interpretation. He concentrated on intent and motivation. Christianity is no different from any other area of life: there are different approaches. But one of the biggest divides is whether you see the Bible as providing definite rules for most things, or more like general principles. Relaxed Christians see it as a source of general principles. If you look at the Christians groups around here you'll see plenty of examples of the other approach.

There are several reasons that someone who is generally relaxed might still draw lines you wouldn't:

* It's not a science. There's no meter that lets us measure how relaxed an action is, so that we can always draw the line the same place. Thus no one is completely consistent. I'll bet even you aren't...

* A lot of kids (I'm assuming she's a teenager or a young adult living at home; the situation changes a lot if she's an adult still depending upon her parents rules) obey their parents. At least normally. The parents may not be as relaxed as you are. They may also have different experiences, and be trying to protect her from things you're not thinking about. My observation is that the smart kids tend to obey their parents, but find ways to negotiate the things that really matter.

* I work with teens in a church that's about as relaxed as you'll get. We don't try to push kids to sign purity pledges or particularly focus on preventing premarital intercourse. But our kids of both sexes seem to be pretty careful about sex. I can see one of our girls not wanting to get into a situation where she might be tempted to do something she would regret. The swimming in a public place sounds more like her parents though. Sorry, parents sometimes get overprotective. Don't laugh until you're a parent yourself.

 

[If Not For Grace]

Why go and bend the rules to suit yourself

I have no scripture that says one can not listen to Lady GaGa, The swimming/bedroom rules I believe u say are her parents not hers. If she lives in their house it's their rules regardless of why..

Being a relaxed Christian IMHO is just not being tighty pants about a bunch of do's & don'ts which are irrelevant to salvation. (Salvation is a gift-accept it or don't). To quote Paul "all things are lawful unto me, but not all things are beneficial". I suspect Neither You or your firend need to be told right from wrong or they why's...Do you?

 

[salida]

Rules? Its about a relationship with Christ which changes ones lifestyle.

Are you a Real Christian or a Sunday Christian
http://www.rapture-soon.net/realchristian.html

What do you mean by relaxed? The bible mentions lukewarm.

Lukewarm Church
http://www.christianexaminer.com/Articles/Articles%20Jun07/Art_Jun07_20.html

 

[JordanDaniel]

There can be, but by being relaxed may also be taking Jesus's forgiveness for granted if she ever becomes too relaxed. I guess I'm a "relaxed" Christian. But to me that is ignorant. For a take shame in every sin a commit.. I could never tell someone I'm a relaxed Christian. I'm a Stressed out Christian haha)