I am a 39 year old male, raised in a Christian home and became a Christian at age 8. I've been married for nearly 20 years and have 3 great sons.
I'm pretty active in my local church where a lot of people respect me. I have a very rewarding career, and by just about every measure, my life would seem nearly perfect. Except I live with depression.
No one really knows that I struggle with depression. My wife probably recognizes the symptoms from when I had a severe bout with depression when I was younger, but I have not talked with her about it recently.
What's wrong with me? Why can't I be happy?
I've been through all the 'inner healing' stuff, and though there is certainly garbage in my past, I'm a grown man and I believe all that stuff is behind me. Still my heart aches, and I feel lonely.
I'm at the place where I have to say that I'm not going to get the kind of ciompanionship and affirmation from my wife that I think I need. After 20 years neither of us is able to change to accomodate the other any more than we already have. Is this a good realization on my part? Something that I need to get over before I can move on?
Why would God make me like this? The external circumstances of my life are so good. Yet I feel so bad.
What am I missing?
I'm pretty active in my local church where a lot of people respect me. I have a very rewarding career, and by just about every measure, my life would seem nearly perfect. Except I live with depression.
No one really knows that I struggle with depression. My wife probably recognizes the symptoms from when I had a severe bout with depression when I was younger, but I have not talked with her about it recently.
What's wrong with me? Why can't I be happy?
I've been through all the 'inner healing' stuff, and though there is certainly garbage in my past, I'm a grown man and I believe all that stuff is behind me. Still my heart aches, and I feel lonely.
I'm at the place where I have to say that I'm not going to get the kind of ciompanionship and affirmation from my wife that I think I need. After 20 years neither of us is able to change to accomodate the other any more than we already have. Is this a good realization on my part? Something that I need to get over before I can move on?
Why would God make me like this? The external circumstances of my life are so good. Yet I feel so bad.
What am I missing?
istherehope, God bless you! i want to share advice in the form of sharing my struggles with you. i'm bipolar-scitzophrenic. i grew up with everyone trying to heal me, and with the thinking that if i only had faith enough, or was good enough, God would indeed heal me. actually, though, the Holy Spirit taught me to be content with my thorn. and now, it is a huge blessing. to me and other's i witness too. the bible has scriptures that show us how to manage life. it turns out that these scriptures keep me focused and help me manage. here is a testemony and real inspiration:
