Is Sex Before Marriage Permissible?

[Servant222]

I don't think "permissible" is the right word to use here. It's sinful. But it's also forgivable. It can lead to negative consequences, but God can and does take those things that seeem bad and make from them something to His glory.

And again we seem to be focusing on the idea of God taking something away instead of the idea that God gave us something good and we perverted it.

Good points you make. We have a God who forgives. But forgiveness also requires repentence, so is it not true that those who are in relationships that don't feel right need to consider making some changes and moving off in a more Godly direction.

 

[sebastian]

when you find someone you love with all your heart and loves you back, tell them about all the women/men you slept with before them and tell me they were over the moon about it; and when they tell you about all thier previous partners will you jump with joy knowing that this isn't something new for them? I regret everything i ever did with a woman because i feel that when/if i do ever get married it won't be something new and some kind of experiance i can have only with my wife and that annoys me. so yeah, i think it's wrong, not only because it's a sin against God but because it's a sin against your future wife/husband and yourself.

(this is not directed at anoyone by the way. I just can't figure a better way to make my point.)

 

[Miracle Storm]

when you find someone you love with all your heart and loves you back, tell them about all the women/men you slept with before them and tell me they were over the moon about it; and when they tell you about all thier previous partners will you jump with joy knowing that this isn't something new for them? I regret everything i ever did with a woman because i feel that when/if i do ever get married it won't be something new and some kind of experiance i can have only with my wife and that annoys me. so yeah, i think it's wrong, not only because it's a sin against God but because it's a sin against your future wife/husband and yourself.

(this is not directed at anoyone by the way. I just can't figure a better way to make my point.)

I understand and it's true....

 

[MezzaMorta]

I said in one sentance that sex OUTSIDE of mariage is nasty. .

I like nasty.

 

[Miracle Storm]

24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

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[FONT=&quot]Never says that all sex outside of marriage is sexual immorality though, just as all sex with in a marriage is not all not sexually immoral. [/FONT]



[FONT=&quot]Never says that”[/FONT]
“3It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4that each of you should learn to control his own body[a] in a way that is holy and honorable, 5not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God;”

Two consenting individuals engaging in sexual relations is not sexual immoral to me and that scripture does not say do not do it. To me it is speaking against rape, or forcing a girl, or unmoral sexual acts. It says “passionate lust”, lust is the want of something you cannot have. So it is speaking about sex with women who either do not want to have sex with you or cannot. Not women who willingly engage in intercourse.

Anyone can twist Scripture to make it suit their needs especially when it comes to adultery & the "if it feels good do it".

27"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.'[e] 28But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

Do you really think Jesus meant if they are consenting adults it's okay? The woman or man doesn't even need to be involved for you to commit adultery in your heart.

 

[Miracle Storm]

I like nasty.

it figures...

 

[Dannager]

Do you really think Jesus meant if they are consenting adults it's okay? The woman or man doesn't even need to be involved for you to commit adultery in your heart.

Sure, you're right. As long as you don't actually understand scripture properly.

 

[MezzaMorta]

Anyone can twist Scripture to make it suit their needs especially when it comes to adultery & the "if it feels good do it".

Do you really think Jesus meant if they are consenting adults it's okay? The woman or man doesn't even need to be involved for you to commit adultery in your heart.

Lust is "[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]unrestrained sexual craving" ie: Rape or Sexual assault.

You honestly think God hates me because I bring a couple girls home from the clubs each week that want to come back to my house?

Jesus stopped the prostitute from being stoned, and "prostitution" would seem far more sexually immoral than consensual sex.
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[holo]

Does this mean that, for example, if a couple come to know each other as virgins, and are totally committed to staying together, there still should be no sex before they get married?

The couple in question should do like Adam and Eve, and simply live naked in the prescence of God, and not listen to the snake tempting them to figure out some definite, universal rule.

It's impossible to answer the question, since it's hypothetical and presumes that we are to live according to (the) law instead of the Spirit.

 

[holo]

Any sin can be found excuses for.

True, and any opinion, emotion, theology, conviction, thought, urge, drive, culture and practice can also be labeled as "sinful" if you feel like condemning it.

 

[holo]

I don't think you should use the word nasty but "unclean" or unbiblical.

Seriously, what does "unbiblical" even mean?

 

[Servant222]

You honestly think God hates me because I bring a couple girls home from the clubs each week that want to come back to my house?

If you're bringing these "girls" home for sexual activity, then this would be contrary to what the Bible teaches and the Holy Spirit convinces me is appropriate behavior for a Christian.

First, some definitions:

Websters Dictionary:

Lust: usually intense or unbridled sexual desire.
Debauchery: extreme indulgence in sensuality.

Oxford Dictionary:

Lust: strong sexual desire
Debauchery: excessive indulgence in sensual pleasures.

Then some Bible verses to ponder.

1 Thessalonians 4:

4that each of you should learn to control his own body[a] in a way that is holy and honorable, 5not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; 6and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you.

1 Peter 4:

2As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God. 3For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do—living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry.

Colossians 3:

5Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. 6Because of these, the wrath of God is coming.

1 John 2:

15Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16For everything in the world—the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does—comes not from the Father but from the world. 17The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever.

So are these "girls" you bring home Christian women who share your view that what you are doing is not lust and debauchery?

 

[dayhiker]

Ever action can be made sinful.

 

[dayhiker]

when you find someone you love with all your heart and loves you back, tell them about all the women/men you slept with before them and tell me they were over the moon about it; and when they tell you about all thier previous partners will you jump with joy knowing that this isn't something new for them? I regret everything i ever did with a woman because i feel that when/if i do ever get married it won't be something new and some kind of experiance i can have only with my wife and that annoys me. so yeah, i think it's wrong, not only because it's a sin against God but because it's a sin against your future wife/husband and yourself.

(this is not directed at anoyone by the way. I just can't figure a better way to make my point.)

HI Sebastian,
I think you made your point very well.
I married a virgin. Persoanlly, I wouldn't do that again. That's my opinion. Being 55, I'll probably not have to worry about it tho.
dayhiker

 

[Servant222]

James 5:

19My brothers, if one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring him back, 20remember this: Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from death and cover over a multitude of sins.

 

[icedtea]

We should be thinking what does God want? instead of What do I want?

 

[Servant222]

1 Corinthians 7:

8Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. 9But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

36If anyone thinks he is acting improperly toward the virgin he is engaged to, and if she is getting along in years and he feels he ought to marry, he should do as he wants. He is not sinning. They should get married.

 

[Servant222]

This came from another thread, but is worth repeating here.

We know that whenever the Bible refers to fornication, or sexual sin, premarital sex is included in that. Why? Because of the Old Testament. Premarital sex was actually punishable by stoning to death. So the audience knew full well that premarital sex was sexual sin, and so should we.

Through Christ we are liberated from the old ceremonial laws. But God's moral laws are eternal, and that includes the sanctity of sex within marriage. If we are filled with the Holy Spirit, we are not simply free to sin as we choose. We are free from the sin, as the Holy Spirit leads us towards obedience and glorification of our Lord. When we belong to Christ, we are members of His body, not enslaved by selfish desires and sinful lusts, but instead our lives become focused on serving Him. We actually gain the desire to leave sinful ways behind us.

Let me ask you this. What do you think sex is? Why do you think God created it? What is its purpose?
If sex is what actually consummates the marriage and makes the two become one, what is it outside of marriage? We know that the Bible tells us if a man has sex with a prostitute, the two become one flesh. In essence he has married her, right? How is this different than any other kind of premarital or extramarital sex?

We know that adultery is sex outside of marriage, right? So if a man has sex with someone other than his wife it is adultery. What if he is not married? Then he can't really have sex with his wife, right? Because he doesn't have a wife. Sex with anyone when he is not married is adultery because he is not married to her. This is a really simple concept.

 

[Miracle Storm]

Lust is "[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]unrestrained sexual craving" ie: Rape or Sexual assault. [/FONT]

[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]I am sorry, but you are wrong. As I said many like to make excuses to continue to live in sin. . .[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]1.)intense sexual desire or appetite.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]2.)uncontrolled or illicit sexual desire or appetite; lecherousness.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]3.)a passionate or overmastering desire or craving (usually fol. by for): a lust for power. [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]4.)ardent enthusiasm; zest; relish: an enviable lust for life. [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]5.)Obsolete. a.pleasure or delight. b.desire; inclination; wish.[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]Dictionary.com[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]As I said, you do not need to have sex, the women or man does not need to be involved for you to have committed adultery in your heart.[/FONT]

27"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.'[e] 28But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]You honestly think God hates me because I bring a couple girls home from the clubs each week that want to come back to my house?[/FONT][/FONT][/FONT][/FONT]

[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]Why would you say that? [/FONT]

[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]Why are you so defensive?[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]What gave you the idea I was even suggesting that God "hates" you. [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]On the contrary, I know God loves you very much! He loves us all, even when we are living in sin.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]

Jesus stopped the prostitute from being stoned, and "prostitution" would seem far more sexually immoral than consensual sex.

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He didn't exactly stop them, He didn't say STOP.

He said, "If anyone of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." None did.

I am not throwing any stones either, but I am telling you that it is sin, adultery, to have sex before marriage, to have sex with someone else besides your spouse or even look at someone with lust in your heart. We have all sinned, and we must stop being in denial of it. Staying in denial keeps us living in sin.

Also, Jesus told the prostitute to Leave her life of sin ie: REPENT

7When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." 8Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

9At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" 11"No one, sir," she said.
"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."

ETA.
You said you are bringing a couple of girls a week home from clubs, this makes me concerned for you if you are being sexually active with these women.
You can contract herpes and genital warts, condoms do not protect you from these STDs.
Also you can contract HIV, syphylis, Hep a, b, c. gonorrhea ect. They are only one accident away or one defective condom away...

Please pray on this friend.

 

[Servant222]

[FONT=Arial, Arial, Helvetica]I am sorry, but you are wrong. As I said many like to make excuses to continue to live in sin. . .[/FONT]

I agree with your interpretation of the Bible on this matter. But it is not only a matter of Biblical interpretation, but also of listening and responding to the simple truths that the Holy Spirit within you teaches.

Luke 10:

21At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure.

And then the verse that makes it so clear to me how God wants us to behave.

1 Corinthians 6:

18Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. 19Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.