Dorothea
One of God's handmaidens
- Jul 10, 2007
- 21,649
- 3,635
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Female
- Faith
- Eastern Orthodox
- Marital Status
- Single
- Politics
- US-Others
I can relate to the spiritual struggles. I've been practicing Orthodox since 1997, but the struggles of the mind - the assailing thoughts have gotten more difficult. And like Fr. Meletios Webber had said at a Lenten retreat a few years back, these thoughts are not from us but from what we have taken in throughout the days and most damaging is all of the junk I took in before I was a practicing Orthodox Christian. If I'm able to brush them off while awake and conscious, they assail me in my dreams. And since I have some issues with anxiety and panic attacks, it just compounds the issue...meaning I over analyze and get too worried about the thoughts, and they come back because of memories of them and the struggles I've had. It's embarrassing the thoughts I've had, and to have to go to confession for the same stupid sins over and over again is embarrassing too. I cannot bring myself to say anything explicit about my thoughts to my SF. I just say I've had unclean thoughts. He accepts that and I know God knows what they are. I hope that is ok because it's hard.
Sorry for the babbling. I'm going to COnfession tomorrow and nervous about it even though my SF knows my struggles. Ugh. Lord, have mercy.
Ps: sorry for typos. I'm on my phone.
Sorry for the babbling. I'm going to COnfession tomorrow and nervous about it even though my SF knows my struggles. Ugh. Lord, have mercy.
Ps: sorry for typos. I'm on my phone.
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