Is it strange to be over the hill and still be single?

[Lost4words]

I like being single.

I reached the top of the hill. I am now over it and sliding out of control going down the other side!

 

[Niels]

It is a little strange in that it's unusual, sure, but being unusual doesn't mean it's bad. Just look at all the dysfunction that's considered normal these days. If I meet somebody with whom I get along well enough on a romantic and ideological level, then I'm all for having a relationship with her. Such women do exist, and are worth waiting for. I'm not looking for perfection, just one who is right for me. If I don't meet somebody who fits the bill, then singleness is the better option. My life is pretty good as is, and I wouldn't want to ruin a good thing just to say that I have a significant other.

 

[returntosender]

You're funny,. If you're over the hill in your 40's what will you be in your 60's?

 

[Christian Bowler]

I am still single and enjoy my time being alone and a relationship would just complicate things in my life.

 

[bluegot]

I have been divorced for 15 years and never been happier. I don't even date, the thought of being married doesn't interest me in the least. I play a little game when I go shopping. I watch couples. Many times there is nit picking and fighting going on, the couple looks miserable. I recently went to a reception, I spent time watching couples there too, it appeared the majority was not happy. I think that we are so fallen we don't even know what marriage is supposed to be anymore, nor do we know how to love. I'm not saying you can't be happy being married, it's just my observation that a lot are not happy.

 

[bèlla]

I think that we are so fallen we don't even know what marriage is supposed to be anymore, nor do we know how to love. I'm not saying you can't be happy being married, it's just my observation that a lot are not happy.

A lot of people base their decisions on emotions and in the moment. They don't consider the road ahead. They fill their heads with fanciful notions instead of taking stock of what's before them and determining if its enough. Not in the ideal state they're fathoming. But as they are.

We've been discussing this on the single's forum. I shared a few details about a long-term connection I have. We've been friends for 19 years and love is the glue that holds us together. It's bigger than the mistakes and shortcomings and a guideline too. There's things we'll never do to one another because of our regard. We don't want to cause the other pain.

You have to be able to look beyond yourself to make it work. It can't be one-sided. Both must be willing to do their part. And I think it comes back to God. We always felt our bond was divinely authored. No matter what we experienced the love never ceased.

Its given me a clear idea of what unconditional love requires. And for better or worse too. You learn to let a lot of things go. She's one of kind. I don't meet many men like that. But I'm hopeful.

~bella

 

[tdidymas]

I have been divorced for 15 years and never been happier. I don't even date, the thought of being married doesn't interest me in the least. I play a little game when I go shopping. I watch couples. Many times there is nit picking and fighting going on, the couple looks miserable. I recently went to a reception, I spent time watching couples there too, it appeared the majority was not happy. I think that we are so fallen we don't even know what marriage is supposed to be anymore, nor do we know how to love. I'm not saying you can't be happy being married, it's just my observation that a lot are not happy.

People are not happy because:
1. They don't put Christ first in their lives.
2. They're full of conceit, that is, self-centered.
3. Thoughts are centered on "make me happy", that is, the desire for the other to "make me feel good" is a priority in the thinking, rather than something more unified like teamwork.
4. Self-righteous attitudes lead to a commitment to always being right about everything, and this is what causes all the bickering on petty things.
5. "Falling in love" is all about the euphoria, so when it subsides to normalcy, it must be the fault of the partner. The euphoria is an addiction, so there are withdrawal symptoms.
6. The stress of relationship and caring for the family adds to the pressure to perform, which cramps the style of the free-spirited and lazy, causing their unhappiness.
7. The pressure to perform is increased when demands are made by the partners. There is often a "you're not doing your part" attitude.
8. Snap judgments are made from suspicions, and either there is building resentment from no communication, or the kind of communication on such issues causes conflict.
9. They have little to no discernment on what to tolerate and what not to tolerate.
10. The prideful attitude of "I don't need no help" causes them to reject any suggestion they need counseling.
11. Vying for control of relationship and family, that is, power struggles.
12. Ignorance due to lack of good education and leadership.

I'm sure this list could go beyond 100.

 

[returntosender]

I wasn't happy in either situation but I'd rather be married.

 

[GospelS]

I wasn't happy in either situation but I'd rather be married.

That’s good you rather be married. I pray and hope that you be married then.

 

[returntosender]

That’s good you rather be married. I pray and hope that you be married then.

I had my chances, enough.

 

[OldWiseGuy]

Marriage is an institution.

But who wants to spend their life in an institution.

 

[bèlla]

Marriage is an institution.

But who wants to spend their life in an institution.

I'd do it for the right one. I've got the Man on my back. Otherwise, I'd be chilling like you!

~bella

 

[returntosender]

Marriage is an institution.

But who wants to spend their life in an institution.

Awwwwwww,

 

[returntosender]

I'd do it for the right one. I've got the Man on my back. Otherwise, I'd be chilling like you!


~bella

What's that mean, you've got the Man on your back?

 

[bèlla]

Awwwwwww,

You're a sweet girl RTS. You should be settled.

 

[bèlla]

What's that mean, you've got the Man on your back?

I have to marry. Singleness doesn't bother me. But I need a spouse. I understand why and accept it.

 

[returntosender]

I like being single.

I reached the top of the hill. I am now over it and sliding out of control going down the other side!

You can use your tail for a break?

 

[returntosender]

You're a sweet girl RTS. You should be settled.

I am. I am too old to be anything else.

 

[returntosender]

Same question.

Single dude isn't here anymore.

 

[BeyondET]

Same question.

Nay i'm 53 never been married no kids and single.