Is it possible to be a Christian and not be a "people person"

[StevenBelievin]

I know we are supposed to love God and love others, it's just the others thing I struggle with. I think in public I am general nice to people and I like to give money to the homeless people with the cardboard sign, but when I see the general selfishness of people whether it is in traffic or seeing the things in the news that people do it drives me crazy. In traffic it is like "I cant believe you cut me off to be like 2 minutes earlier to work". In the news it's like "I can't believe that people can do these things to one another or be so self serving and evil".

I guess I could fall back on the scripture that says we struggle not against flesh and blood but against principalities and powers in high places. I guess a lot of these people are under the influence of wickedness in the spiritual realms?

What do you think?

 

[Solomons Porch]

Lol I am the same exact way, Im like "hey God" can I like them from afar....... Like wayyyyyy farrrrrr awayyyyyy

The battle is REAL my friend

 

[381465]

I hope so...otherwise I've gotta find another religion.

My wife tells me the best chance for me to love people is to limit contact and try not to get to know them very well.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

I guess a lot of these people are under the influence of wickedness in the spiritual realms?

What do you think?

This is true, as Ephesians 2 says, and Revelation, and Galatians, et al....

A people person who just 'gets along' with the perversion and wickedness on earth is not a Godly person;
remember Lot , a righteous person, was sorely vexed (almost driven craxy), by all the wickedness around him.

And somewhere it is written that anyone who does not weep deeply for all the sin all around us , well, their conscience might not be working in proper order.... (it is actually more direct and sorrowful than this, and a judgment coming ) ...

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

good question. I think you have to try and respect people anyway. Try to see Jesus in them if possible.
This is when you "have to" have contact with people. Otherwise, if your job and home circumstances allow, you can enjoy time alone with the Lord. But you have to at least be praying. Have some daily communication with the divine.

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

Part of me can understand the criticism that monastics get for "escaping the big bad world" and spending their life in prayer.
But have you tried it? I mean I don't think its such a utopia as people say it is.

 

[2PhiloVoid]

I know we are supposed to love God and love others, it's just the others thing I struggle with. I think in public I am general nice to people and I like to give money to the homeless people with the cardboard sign, but when I see the general selfishness of people whether it is in traffic or seeing the things in the news that people do it drives me crazy. In traffic it is like "I cant believe you cut me off to be like 2 minutes earlier to work". In the news it's like "I can't believe that people can do these things to one another or be so self serving and evil".

I guess I could fall back on the scripture that says we struggle not against flesh and blood but against principalities and powers in high places. I guess a lot of these people are under the influence of wickedness in the spiritual realms?

What do you think?

Hi Steven...I think you've nailed in on the head when you said we struggle not against flesh and blood. And even though I don't think you have to instantly become a full-fledged "people person," we still need to remember that sometimes there are a few people out there we will encounter for whom we have to purposely decide to apply more forbearance and possibly even more grace. I'm not the best people person myself, and anything I've achieved so far in my life in interacting with a variety of people has only come from deep thought, social and Christian study, and some prayer.

Peace,
2PhiloVoid

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

I know we are supposed to love God and love others, it's just the others thing I struggle with. I think in public I am general nice to people and I like to give money to the homeless people with the cardboard sign, but when I see the general selfishness of people whether it is in traffic or seeing the things in the news that people do it drives me crazy. In traffic it is like "I cant believe you cut me off to be like 2 minutes earlier to work". In the news it's like "I can't believe that people can do these things to one another or be so self serving and evil".

I guess I could fall back on the scripture that says we struggle not against flesh and blood but against principalities and powers in high places. I guess a lot of these people are under the influence of wickedness in Just having read your postthe spiritual realms?

What do you think?

Just having read your post again, I see that your problem is more general than specific. You find it difficult to love "humanity". I find that when dealing with individuals, a certain level of patience pays off in the long run. They might hold completely different world views and do things which confound, but just respecting them for where they stand right now, is a good starting point.

 

[~Anastasia~]

Part of me can understand the criticism that monastics get for "escaping the big bad world" and spending their life in prayer.
But have you tried it? I mean I don't think its such a utopia as people say it is.

Monastics tend to struggle even more in spiritual warfare than the rest of us. But they do at least have a more ideal environment in which to do it, usually.


(ETA: I'm speaking generally of Orthodox monastics, which I'm familiar with, since we do have a major tradition of monasticism)

 

[FireDragon76]

I think that's why we have to have a certain amount of separation from the ways of the world. Be intentionally counter-cultural. I have recently been reading about the life of Fred Rogers (of Mr. Roger's) and it's been inspiring me in this respect. Mr. Rogers of course was somebody known for being a very friendly, nice person, but at his heart was a vision of human dignity that came from theological convictions. Without the counter-cultural vision, it is indeed difficult to figure out what to do with people, since the way of the world seems to be to treat people as burdens, obstacles, and pawns.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

I don't think so.
(re post 9)

I found having fellow believers to fellowship with daily ,
most important.

 

[~Anastasia~]

I know we are supposed to love God and love others, it's just the others thing I struggle with. I think in public I am general nice to people and I like to give money to the homeless people with the cardboard sign, but when I see the general selfishness of people whether it is in traffic or seeing the things in the news that people do it drives me crazy. In traffic it is like "I cant believe you cut me off to be like 2 minutes earlier to work". In the news it's like "I can't believe that people can do these things to one another or be so self serving and evil".

I guess I could fall back on the scripture that says we struggle not against flesh and blood but against principalities and powers in high places. I guess a lot of these people are under the influence of wickedness in the spiritual realms?

What do you think?

Hello, and welcome to CF.


If you really want to know what I think, it is that these people give us an opportunity to perfect ourselves. They challenge us, yes, and frustrate us. But do we stop to question what is at the basis of our indignation that demands our "right" to be at that spot in traffic?

I'm not saying you are a bad person - not at all. You are just like we all are. Myself definitely included. But with effort, MUCH effort, and retraining our thoughts, and learning to truly prefer others before ourselves, forgiving all wrongs committed against us, and so on, we can very gradually begin to put to death those things in our flesh that constantly rise up in prideful indignation when we are offended.

I'm not speaking of actual evil here. I'm just speaking of those who cut us off in traffic, only to pull into an unimportant stop, or who get in the "10 items or less" line with 18 things when we are in a hurry, and other such annoyances.

Sometimes I think God puts difficult people into our lives so that we can learn to truly love. For if we love only those who love us, what commendation is there in that? Even the heathen do so. Learning to love those who persecute us makes us into the likeness of Christ, who is our example.

God be with you.

 

[~Anastasia~]

I don't think so.
(re post 9)

I found having fellow believers to fellowship with daily ,
most important.

I'm not sure of your meaning, since you referenced my post?

Most monastics live in community. Some live alone.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

I'm not sure of your meaning, since you referenced my post?

I just checked and do not know how to discuss this in this thread/ section.
UNexpectedly, not even thinking in this direction,
I found this rule while checking.
(just a couple minutes ago, to see if something else could be brought up)...

"It is considered off topic to challenge Paul's place as an Apostle."

i.e. from a simple (seemingly) difference of opinion (I don't think what was posted is as good an environment as implied or suggested ),
I now find a far more awkward challenge.

(I know clearly, and always have known that YHWH called and chose and appointed the Apostle Paul, and Y'SHUA taught him as written in Scripture)

The problem is there are others who don't believe this, and I don't know what thread or section to discuss this, or even whether to or not.
(not at all my original reason for posting just a little earlier, before double-checking the rules)

 

[~Anastasia~]

I just checked and do not know how to discuss this in this thread/ section.
UNexpectedly, not even thinking in this direction,
I found this rule while checking.
(just a couple minutes ago, to see if something else could be brought up)...

"It is considered off topic to challenge Paul's place as an Apostle."

i.e. from a simple (seemingly) difference of opinion (I don't think what was posted is as good an environment as implied or suggested ),
I now find a far more awkward challenge.

(I know clearly, and always have known that YHWH called and chose and appointed the Apostle Paul, and Y'SHUA taught him as written in Scripture)

The problem is there are others who don't believe this, and I don't know what thread or section to discuss this, or even whether to or not.
(not at all my original reason for posting just a little earlier, before double-checking the rules)

I'm afraid I don't follow at all. I'm not trying to get you in trouble though.

I said monastics tended to have more spiritual warfare than the rest of us (which pretty much happens to anyone who spends many hours a day in prayer) but that they usually had a more ideal environment (very focused on Christianity with few distractions).

I wasn't understanding what you disagreed with, and I'm not understanding what Paul has to do with it? I'm not trying to argue, just give you the courtesy of a response, but I'm afraid I don't know what we are talking about now?

We can drop it, or if you want you can discuss it. But no, we don't challenge Paul or any other Apostle, Scripture, or the Holy Trinity in GT. I'm just not seeing what that has to do with what I said.

So your choice.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

I'm just not seeing what that has to do with what I said.

I said monastics tended to have more spiritual warfare than the rest of us

but that they usually had a more ideal environment

But no, we don't challenge Paul or any other Apostle, Scripture, or the Holy Trinity in GT.

Simply as I can say, the first thought was that monastics don't have more spiritual warfare at all than the rest of us,
and they also do not have near as good an environment as the rest of us (here for instance, on this forum).

Then, after reading the rules, as I read them, I realized that (possibly) a lot of the isolated places (whether the ones referred to or not, I do not know)
may have objections to Paul the Apostle,
and may teach contrary to what Y'SHUA taught Paul.

 

[~Anastasia~]

Simply as I can say, the first thought was that monastics don't have more spiritual warfare at all than the rest of us,
and they also do not have near as good an environment as the rest of us (here for instance, on this forum).

Then, after reading the rules, as I read them, I realized that (possibly) a lot of the isolated places (whether the ones referred to or not, I do not know)
may have objections to Paul the Apostle,
and may teach contrary to what Y'SHUA taught Paul.

Ah, ok. Well, I only know about Orthodox monastics, going back to the early tradition of the Desert Fathers.

It is not in our Tradition to reject Paul.

And you may disagree with what I said about them engaging more in spiritual warfare. But as I said, anyone who prays many hours a day is kind of "shaking things up" spiritually and it shouldn't come as any great surprise that greater warfare would be the result.

As to their environment, again, I only know of Orthodox monastics. The monasteries are usually quiet places of great external peace, with several Church services a day, the work being such things as tending animals, growing crops, making soap, painting icons, and the like. Community just as one finds living with a family, and the goal being to get along with others in imitation of Christlikeness. Spending time there, it certainly feels ideal.

But on the other hand, I was also surprised to discover a struggle in prayer there beyond what is normal for me. It caught me off guard, but I was reminded that the work of monks is to pray, and to battle in prayer. It is to be expected to feel the effects of stepping into a battlefield.

Like I said, you may not agree, and I'm ok with that. But it has been my experience, and makes sense.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

I guess a lot of these people are under the influence of wickedness in the spiritual realms?

What do you think?

Yes, everywhere practically, yet does that affect/change God's command to love?

I know we are supposed to love God and love others, it's just the other things I struggle with.

Do you mean you don't struggle with the command to love God and to love others
vs "other things" ? > from "it's just the other things I struggle with" <

but when I see the general selfishness of people whether it is in traffic or seeing the things in the news that people do it drives me crazy. In traffic it is like "I cant believe you cut me off to be like 2 minutes earlier to work".

If someone is totally unselfish, would they have a car ? (just a question popped up for perspective I guess; remembering "Schindler's List")

In the news it's like "I can't believe that people can do these things to one another or be so self serving and evil".

"In the news" ? What about every day , day to day, the people we see along the way .... ?

 

[StevenBelievin]

I guess that we could agree on the traffic thing. It is easy to be upset if someone cuts you off and doesn't let you in when you are trying to get in to traffic. Our natural instinct is to give them a piece of our mind, but that isn't the way of God. We should pray for them but it doesn't come easy. We should love others despite their selfish behavior..

 

[Flaming Sword]

I know we are supposed to love God and love others, it's just the others thing I struggle with. I think in public I am general nice to people and I like to give money to the homeless people with the cardboard sign, but when I see the general selfishness of people whether it is in traffic or seeing the things in the news that people do it drives me crazy. In traffic it is like "I cant believe you cut me off to be like 2 minutes earlier to work". In the news it's like "I can't believe that people can do these things to one another or be so self serving and evil".

I guess I could fall back on the scripture that says we struggle not against flesh and blood but against principalities and powers in high places. I guess a lot of these people are under the influence of wickedness in the spiritual realms?

What do you think? Hi, I've struggled with loving others a lot. I'm not a people person, as far as, I don't like most. I have always been an animal/nature kind of girl. Example: I go to walmart and a lot of times think "man, the people in here really smell awful, sometimes", but am the first one to run to help anyone before they ever even ask if I notice they may need it. I am also the first one to tell someone to go f**k themselves if I feel it's needed. I am a Christian. Pop culture Christianity wants you to believe that you have to be a sweet person all of the time in order to call yourself a Christian. Sweet Christians have always turned me off because, as far as I'm concerned, it's fake, and I hate fake. It's like they're trying to earn brownie points with Jesus and earn their way to heaven. If I loved or even just liked everyone all the time, Jesus would not have needed to die for me because I could have gotten to heaven on my own! Sometimes, we need to be just who we are and have compassion for others, respect, and good will to most.