Is it common to...

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

You sometimes refer to other spiritual entities. Are you using them as a kind of metaphor or actual spiritual beings of some kind?

ὁρκίζω σε τὸν θεόν, μή με βασανίσῃς.

We speak the literal.

 

[Johnnz]

Friends or foes?

John
NZ

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

Depends who you ask.

Guardians. Dukes. Kings. Archetypes.
Pestilentials. Servitors. Functionals.
Warriors. Howlers. Mindbenders. Incubi.
Tech Transitionalists. Programmers.
Special Ops, Psy Ops, Black Ops (all in a spiritual sense it means)
Secret Agents, Infiltrators, Spies

Sorry, Moriah has no idea what it bes on about.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

Architects of Transcendent Dimension. Tailors of Time. Tapestry Weavers.
Ministers of Propaganda.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

Its been like this all day. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

Sorry, John, lets take this to PM or something. It bes embarrassed to have spammed its friend's thread so inconsiderately. Bellicus it begs your forgiveness.

 

[Bellicus]

Moriah goes through that a lot, too. Especially when it hears stories of people who seem to have suffered far worse and don't seem to be nearly as messed up. Only thing it can think to say would be that we all bes different and none of us get to choose how we get born, whether we get born susceptible to this disease or that one, or weaker physically than others or smarter or dumber or whatever. None of us get to pick our inborn toolkit for dealing with stuff nor our parents, our peers, our surroundings, whether they encourage strength or feed on our weaknesses or even call strengths weaknesses and cause shame over them crippling us further. We get no choice about that. We do what we can to survive with what we get handed, and that shapes us into what we become, and all abuser-guilt/shame b/s talk aside, no, we really don't get a choice about any of it.


Abuser talk. That's how the abuser wants you to see yourself, to invalidate your own experiences in order to protect themselves and not have to be accountable for what they did to you. It's all your fault, don't be such a wuss, man up (or 'put on your big girl pants' for females) and 'get over it' (i.e. pretend convincingly that it never happened -- impossible to ever do permanently, so believing you must just spirals down).


More abuser talk, and unfortunately engraved and ingrained into society as "normal" and "the way things 'really' are" (which would be a lie because no, things bes NOT really like that, only that abusers TALK like that and LABEL things like that in order to program you to do their dirty work for them by invalidating yourself and your experiences so they don't have to fear ever being held accountable for what they did to you).


More abuser programming.
Learn to detect it. Learn to reject it. And fight it, always fight it, outwardly where you see it being INJECTED into the norm of how "society" thinks, how people raise their kids to think, how peers tell one another to think, and what gets pounded into people's minds and hearts from the pulpit, especially. Abuser programming, abuser talk = TOXIC, TOXIC, TOXIC. It pretends to be the cure when it really bes the poison and the disease itself.


This spiral, designed to keep you miserable and withdrawing deeper into your misery so you don't threaten the status quo of abuse, would be precisely what the abusers intend by abuser-talk and abuser-programming. The fact that so much of abuser-talk and abuser-programming has been burned into people in general as "normal" does not help. We must begin to discern and openly, viscerally, blatantly fight abuser lies where they show up pretending to be "the way things really are". Because they aren't. They are just what bullies and abusers claim so that they can sell their biggest lie of all -- that if you got hurt it's all your fault somehow. You "let" it happen. You "let" yourself feel. They didn't do anything, you did it to yourself somehow. It's all b/s though. They lie. Don't listen.

I really want to believe what you are writing here. It made me feel better earlier today, like I was lighter, like something heavy was lifted off me, like I had air in my blood instead of poison.

 

[Bellicus]

It bes embarrassed to have spammed its friend's thread so inconsiderately. Bellicus it begs your forgiveness.

It is OK, actually I like to see something going on in this thread.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

I really want to believe what you are writing here. It made me feel better earlier today, like I was lighter, like something heavy was lifted off me, like I had air in my blood instead of poison.

It feels very thankful to read this, very thankful indeed.
Yes, please believe it, let your heart testify it bes the truth, and even the Spirit of God speak to you as much.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

It is OK, actually I like to see something going on in this thread.

You bes most kind, brother.

 

[Bellicus]

Feelings are very powerful and to just "stop whining" and "just get over it" is not authentic. In fact it is burying your emotions; in that there is very little healing. Bringing things out, sifting through emotions, events, pain, acknowleging your own sin and working through it, laying it at the cross: this is where healing is because it leads you to Jesus.

I am curious what you really mean by laying something on the cross. I've often heard the words about putting our worries on God etc. But I have never really understood the meaning of it. It is not like I can take a emotion, or a spiritual energy or whatever I can call it, grab it like something physical and lay it on the cross, wherever that is.

And I really want the healing you are talking about. But it is just talk from what I've heard about it. People talk about that there is healing, but there are actually no healing to be found anywhere.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

...

 

[Johnnz]

The cross is powerful because there Jesus defeated evil. But again, it can be used as a religious mantra.

Understanding what was achieved on the cross and by the resurrection allows us to look at what happened with a new hope, of evil overcome. That helps in facing our own experiences with what was done to us.

God gave me a sort of vision once. I saw a dark cross. Then I saw a cross glorious in its light. I saw then that I had to live out of the right side of that cross, of Jesus new life. From that basis I could rework my life.

John
NZ

 

[.Sabre.]

**Possible triggers**

Bellicus:

It is common to have the confusion. I used to hate myself so much, think I was impure and evil because of what I got tricked into doing for the sake of approval. I used to castigate myself daily for impure thoughts which I probably wouldn't have had (or at least not in such detail) were it not for my experiences. I had labels applied to me that are too horrible to repeat, and I sometimes still hear people calling me those names. Sometimes I end up rehashing those situations and thinking about how I should've told someone, fought back (when I was old enough, as well as physically big enough) or just absconded.

 

[myanchor]

Hey Tanya, you studying to be a nurse? Moriah, you weird me out, not going to read your posts anymore. Yes, it can twist you up but therapy, confessing to your spouse and picking up that sack of rocks you gotta tote and giving it to Jesus will help a bunch. My molestation made me hypervigilant of my children and it nearly destroyed my relationship with the first two. I'm more relaxed, but I still watch, though less obtrusively with the last one.