Is CF a healthy outlet as a Christian?

[The Unforgettable Fire]

"But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned." - Titus 3:9-11

I've learned a lot over the years from this forum, but I have found in the last year or so that this is not a good place for me to be. I still check in from time to time and post here and there, but for the most part have learned that for me this place is spiritually unhealthy to hang out in due to the never ending arguments and controversies.

I have never seen this question asked before and I thought it would be worth asking.

Blessings

 

[franky67]

"But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned." - Titus 3:9-11

I've learned a lot over the years from this forum, but I have found in the last year or so that this is not a good place for me to be. I still check in from time to time and post here and there, but for the most part have learned that for me this place is spiritually unhealthy to hang out in due to the never ending arguments and controversies.

I have never seen this question asked before and I thought it would be worth asking.

Blessings

I could tell you were uncomfortable in the last thread about Annaias and Saphira, [SP] but I just wanted to say that I believe this platform can be profitable to a Christian.

Maybe it's just me, but I value other's opinions, and find myself digging harder to find answers than I probably would if it not for the discussions we find ourselves in.

Iron sharpens iron.

 

[JRSut1000]

I dont find it that healthy because a lot of times, its iron and copper or iron and another metal just rubbing up against one another the wrong way causing damage and strife more than 'sharpening'. Most of CF is arguments. Most of it doesnt lead to changed opinions, just a bunch of butting heads. Just my opinion.

 

[franky67]

I dont find it that healthy because a lot of times, its iron and copper or iron and another metal just rubbing up against one another the wrong way causing damage and strife more than 'sharpening'. Most of CF is arguments. Most of it doesnt lead to changed opinions, just a bunch of butting heads. Just my opinion.

OK

 

[paul1149]

It's a good question to ask. CF is the best run site of its type that I have seen, but anything can take us away from pure devotion to God. And I would agree that there is a lot of back and forth that is not edifying. As with anything, involvement at CF has to be consecrated to the Lord for His purposes. If we do so, our stay here will be beneficial to ourselves and others.

 

[hislegacy]

"But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned." - Titus 3:9-11

I've learned a lot over the years from this forum, but I have found in the last year or so that this is not a good place for me to be. I still check in from time to time and post here and there, but for the most part have learned that for me this place is spiritually unhealthy to hang out in due to the never ending arguments and controversies.

I have never seen this question asked before and I thought it would be worth asking.

Blessings

That is a hard, but valid question.

I took a one year break from CF and was actually refreshed by not coming in. i question why I am still here at times. I've met some friends, been blown away by the extreme prejudicial statements towards certain things.

I can't honestly say one way or the other if my experience here has been good or bad.

hmmm......

 

[christseeker45]

"But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned." - Titus 3:9-11

I've learned a lot over the years from this forum, but I have found in the last year or so that this is not a good place for me to be. I still check in from time to time and post here and there, but for the most part have learned that for me this place is spiritually unhealthy to hang out in due to the never ending arguments and controversies.

I have never seen this question asked before and I thought it would be worth asking.

Blessings

It is a good question and I don't know. Maybe GT is not the most healthy subforum there seems to be a lot of misunderstanding and judging there.

 

[The Unforgettable Fire]

I could tell you were uncomfortable in the last thread about Annaias and Saphira, [SP] but I just wanted to say that I believe this platform can be profitable to a Christian.

Maybe it's just me, but I value other's opinions, and find myself digging harder to find answers than I probably would if it not for the discussions we find ourselves in.

Iron sharpens iron.

I checked out of the other thread because I noticed myself getting frustrated. I have seen some great conversations here on CF and as I said, I have learned a lot here over the years, but I have concluded that the cost / benefit ratio of an open forum like this is generally not in the best interest of learning.

 

[The Unforgettable Fire]

Having stepped away and come back from time to time to CF, I now see things here I didn't see before.

The saying...step back, take a deep breath and get some perspective has really been beneficial to me and not just concerning this forum.

 

[Simon Peter]

Is CF a healthy outlet as a Christian?

Possibly. But it depends what you are expecting from CF. Or perhaps more importantly, what is CF?

If you in any way expect CF to be a substitute for human interactive Christian fellowship - and all the encouragement and ministry that are part of that - I think you are making a serious error.

You don't go to a church picnic expecting to learn deep theology, and you don't go to the church library to experience a Christian music festival.

CF is mostly a place for debate and - on it's better days - discussion, about theology and doctrine.

It was that way before most of us joined, and it is that way when each of take breaks from the CF community.

With that in mind, I use this place to discuss, debate and learn. I am so thankful for the people at CF, especially those I disagree with, because they have caused me to seek out and understand what I truly believe.

peace,
Simon

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

"But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned." - Titus 3:9-11

I've learned a lot over the years from this forum, but I have found in the last year or so that this is not a good place for me to be. I still check in from time to time and post here and there, but for the most part have learned that for me this place is spiritually unhealthy to hang out in due to the never ending arguments and controversies.

I have never seen this question asked before and I thought it would be worth asking.

Blessings

Hi Twiggy

I was convicted of the verse you quoted a few years ago too and stopped arguing with people online.

As a result I come onto CF to encourage where I can, relax by playing a couple of games and to pray for those who need it.

CF can be a healthy outlet provided you can avoid the fruitless debate and try to allow most of the drama to wash way over you.

 

[Tamara224]

I've benefited a lot from CF.

It has taught me to pick my battles better.

It has helped me hone my argumentation and persuasive skills.

It has helped me learn to communicate my meaning clearly.

It has challenged me in various doctrines which I eventually ended up changing my mind about. I've been exposed to many and varied differences of opinion and facts I was not aware of that have caused me to grow.

I've learned to be careful not to fall into the trap of getting entrenched in my position instead of being open to considering another one. (This is an ongoing process, lol). And I think this is key if we want to have fruitful debate/discussion. I've learned to be careful not to strawman the opposition, to let people tell me what they believe not try to learn what they believe from someone who agrees with my preconceptions. (e.g. read "Love Wins" or "The Shack" instead of reading a critique of the book by someone I like; don't start a post/thread with "WoF believes X", instead say what I believe and let WoFers speak for themselves [of course, I don't debate about WoF anymore, see below]).

Arguing/debating/discussing online has revealed a lot of myself to me. How I react - whether it makes me angry, sad, frustrated, happy, proud, etc - shows me things in my heart that I didn't know were there.

Yeah, sometimes it gets to be too much and counter-productive. When I realize that my anger or frustration at someone online is affecting the way I treat my loved ones.... that's a problem. But that happens less and less all the time.

I don't post and visit the SF/C subforum as much as I used to. I used to be really active here. But it seems like the regulars here are stuck in a rut of the same exact arguments that have been being argued here for years. When the same people are arguing the same thing FOR YEARS that can't, IMHO, be considered productive. Especially when past "wrongs" against one another are brought up again and again, hurt feelings and unforgiveness are allowed to fester and people can no longer see one another as brothers and sisters because our doctrines divide us. There aren't any new arguments or counter-arguments. Everyone knows how everyone stands on the matter and the arguments turn into snark-fests.

So, yeah. Overall, I think CF has been good for me. It's not perfect, but the strife and pressure causes growth, too.

 

[The Unforgettable Fire]

Possibly. But it depends what you are expecting from CF. Or perhaps more importantly, what is CF?

If you in any way expect CF to be a substitute for human interactive Christian fellowship - and all the encouragement and ministry that are part of that - I think you are making a serious error.

You don't go to a church picnic expecting to learn deep theology, and you don't go to the church library to experience a Christian music festival.

CF is mostly a place for debate and - on it's better days - discussion, about theology and doctrine.

It was that way before most of us joined, and it is that way when each of take breaks from the CF community.

With that in mind, I use this place to discuss, debate and learn. I am so thankful for the people at CF, especially those I disagree with, because they have caused me to seek out and understand what I truly believe.

peace,
Simon

There might have been a time years ago when I thought something like CF could be an adequate substitution. That never progressed beyond a theory though and I quickly became convinced that not to be the case.

I suppose I expect a little bit more unity in spirit than I see here usually. Frankly it doesn't feel very Christian in that respect. I remember a long time ago where there was that unity at times, but it seems absent now. Probably because there is a constant influx of people coming and going and coming back.

Of course it is what it is.

 

[The Unforgettable Fire]

Hi Twiggy

I was convicted of the verse you quoted a few years ago too and stopped arguing with people online.

As a result I come onto CF to encourage where I can, relax by playing a couple of games and to pray for those who need it.

CF can be a healthy outlet provided you can avoid the fruitless debate and try to allow most of the drama to wash way over you.

Since I decided to stop frequenting here all the time, I noticed that I had been constantly looking for debates with people. I wanted to challenge people and challenge myself as I did here. In short, CF very much carried over into real life and it has been a slow process to learn to not debate people and not look for discrepancies in everything I hear, read and see.

Basically I have come to the hard conclusion that I am not nearly as smart as I think I am and neither is anyone else. Paul even says in Corinthians...knowledge makes us proud, but charity edifies. I have begun to see that for all the knowledge I acquire, it really doesn't amount to anything. That God is interested in how much love I give and receive and not how much I know.

It's a hard lesson for me to learn. It will probably take a life time or more.

 

[The Unforgettable Fire]

I've benefited a lot from CF.

It has taught me to pick my battles better.

It has helped me hone my argumentation and persuasive skills.

It has helped me learn to communicate my meaning clearly.

It has challenged me in various doctrines which I eventually ended up changing my mind about. I've been exposed to many and varied differences of opinion and facts I was not aware of that have caused me to grow.

I've learned to be careful not to fall into the trap of getting entrenched in my position instead of being open to considering another one. (This is an ongoing process, lol). And I think this is key if we want to have fruitful debate/discussion. I've learned to be careful not to strawman the opposition, to let people tell me what they believe not try to learn what they believe from someone who agrees with my preconceptions. (e.g. read "Love Wins" or "The Shack" instead of reading a critique of the book by someone I like; don't start a post/thread with "WoF believes X", instead say what I believe and let WoFers speak for themselves [of course, I don't debate about WoF anymore, see below]).

Arguing/debating/discussing online has revealed a lot of myself to me. How I react - whether it makes me angry, sad, frustrated, happy, proud, etc - shows me things in my heart that I didn't know were there.

Yeah, sometimes it gets to be too much and counter-productive. When I realize that my anger or frustration at someone online is affecting the way I treat my loved ones.... that's a problem. But that happens less and less all the time.

I don't post and visit the SF/C subforum as much as I used to. I used to be really active here. But it seems like the regulars here are stuck in a rut of the same exact arguments that have been being argued here for years. When the same people are arguing the same thing FOR YEARS that can't, IMHO, be considered productive. Especially when past "wrongs" against one another are brought up again and again, hurt feelings and unforgiveness are allowed to fester and people can no longer see one another as brothers and sisters because our doctrines divide us. There aren't any new arguments or counter-arguments. Everyone knows how everyone stands on the matter and the arguments turn into snark-fests.

So, yeah. Overall, I think CF has been good for me. It's not perfect, but the strife and pressure causes growth, too.

Don't get me wrong. I revel in a good debate. I have just begun to question how profitable it truly is for me. In some ways yes. I feel like I could hold my own against most in Christian theology since having delved in it the past few years. However, what good is that really?

Does it provoke love in others or in myself? Not really. At worst it provokes arrogance, pride an division and at best it keeps me humble because I am always learning something new and it keeps me grounded in the knowledge of the truth of the grace of God.

However, I and all those around me are benefited far more when I practice love.

Not saying one can't do both, but generally speaking, if I am debating then I am not really building a relationship.

 

[Tamara224]

Everyone has their own unique gifts and callings.

For some, debate and argument only produces strife and discouragement. For others, it can actually be a bonding. I know that with my husband, I feel closer to him after we've had a good argument (not a fight, an argument in the 'legal' sense of the word) - especially when he proves me wrong. I love that. I love that he's not afraid to tell me I'm wrong and doesn't shy away when I get passionate and really engaged.

My family is mostly like that too - we get intense in our discussions. And when we disagree, it can get loud. But we find at the end that usually we come to agreement AND we feel closer to one another.

You don't really get to know a person - there's no intimacy or connection - until you've have a lively disagreement, IMHO.

We each need to know ourselves and practice self-control accordingly, though. If it's just a drain for you and you have a hard time disagreeing in love... then, yeah, debate/discussion forums probably aren't the place for you.

 

[The Unforgettable Fire]

Everyone has their own unique gifts and callings.

For some, debate and argument only produces strife and discouragement. For others, it can actually be a bonding. I know that with my husband, I feel closer to him after we've had a good argument (not a fight, an argument in the 'legal' sense of the word) - especially when he proves me wrong. I love that. I love that he's not afraid to tell me I'm wrong and doesn't shy away when I get passionate and really engaged.

My family is mostly like that too - we get intense in our discussions. And when we disagree, it can get loud. But we find at the end that usually we come to agreement AND we feel closer to one another.

You don't really get to know a person - there's no intimacy or connection - until you've have a lively disagreement, IMHO.

We each need to know ourselves and practice self-control accordingly, though. If it's just a drain for you and you have a hard time disagreeing in love... then, yeah, debate/discussion forums probably aren't the place for you.

I guess that is the case then. Maybe it is just me, but from my experience, my "being right" from my point of view and voicing my opinions has been more divisive than a catalyst for deeper relationship.

 

[Andy S. Wright]

As has been said, I'm sure (haven't read all the posts), the benefits of this forum vary depending on many variables (maturity, spiritual gifts, personality traits, etc). I've seen both my gifts and my flaws on display here (more of the latter, I'm afraid) which has led me to more than a few "Search Me, O God" moments.

If there's any real drawback to sites like this its the faceless anonymity factor which tends to lend itself to less tactful or diplomatic forms of communication when emotions enter the discussion. I know I've said things in the heat of battle that I've regretted after the blood returned to normal temperature. Hence the need for a break from engaging in these conflicts from time to time.

Iron indeed sharpens iron. However, one must take care not to burn down the blacksmith shop with the sparks from the sharpening process. That care comes from experience, maturity, and most importantly, yielded obedience to Holy Spirit.

Just my .50. Do with it what you will.

ASW

 

[Tamara224]

I guess that is the case then. Maybe it is just me, but from my experience, my "being right" from my point of view and voicing my opinions has been more divisive than a catalyst for deeper relationship.

Well, it's a hard concept to grasp for some... but not all arguing is just about "being right."

It IS possible to debate with humility and respect. Not always easy, but it gets easier with practice.

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

Since I decided to stop frequenting here all the time, I noticed that I had been constantly looking for debates with people. I wanted to challenge people and challenge myself as I did here. In short, CF very much carried over into real life and it has been a slow process to learn to not debate people and not look for discrepancies in everything I hear, read and see.

Basically I have come to the hard conclusion that I am not nearly as smart as I think I am and neither is anyone else. Paul even says in Corinthians...knowledge makes us proud, but charity edifies. I have begun to see that for all the knowledge I acquire, it really doesn't amount to anything. That God is interested in how much love I give and receive and not how much I know.

It's a hard lesson for me to learn. It will probably take a life time or more.

Amen. I can relate. But you know what? It's humbling when we are able to recognise our shortcomings like this, as this is the beginning then of our journey in a new direction - closer to the Lord.

In a way mine was in the reverse - things that I was not freely able to express offline was offloaded here (in the Outreach section) and I was convicted then of whether or not I was being a light on a hill for those who didn't believe. I had to take a step back then and re-evaluate what and how I carried out my walk both offline and online. It was abit of spiritual growing up for me, I guess.