I'm 28 and I have to be honest, there are times when I'm embrassed to still be a virgin at this age. I know that according to the bible I'm doing what's right by waiting for marriage, but what if I never get married. The thought of dying a virgin bothers me!! Does anyone else feel this way?
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Is anyone else embrassed to still be a virgin?
- Thread starter Janetlove
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Don't be embarrassed. It makes me sad to hear people are embarrassed about that. You should be proud. Our culture puts too much emphasis on sex and casual sex. You own your sexuality, if you want to save it for marriage that should be celebrated. As a culture we celebrate women who own their sexuality by taking control of their sex lives and by being honest and educated about their needs but we shame women and men who take control of their sexuality and follow their beliefs and preserve their sexuality. It's a double standard that isn't fair at all.
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smacky ramone
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I just don't make a huge production out of it. Some folks will tell everyone and his dog they are virgins.
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i don't think being a virgin or not being a virgin is anything to be embarrassed about personally, or proud of. who a person is, is so much more than what their v-card status is.
I know in this day and age its considered strange to reach a certain age and to still be a virgin. but really who cares? some people might make fun of virgins, but to me that reflects more on the people making the jokes than on the virgins. I think its actually kind of sad to only be able to view sex as such a light topic to the point that you think everyone should be doing it.
as for non-virgins, in Christ all sins are washed away. People may still look down their noses at non-virgins, but thankfully what they think doesn't matter. what God thinks does, so long as we aim to live our lives for Him, thats the important thing.
so yeah... i'm not really worried about someone else's virginity or lack thereof. None of my business anyhow.
I know in this day and age its considered strange to reach a certain age and to still be a virgin. but really who cares? some people might make fun of virgins, but to me that reflects more on the people making the jokes than on the virgins. I think its actually kind of sad to only be able to view sex as such a light topic to the point that you think everyone should be doing it.
as for non-virgins, in Christ all sins are washed away. People may still look down their noses at non-virgins, but thankfully what they think doesn't matter. what God thinks does, so long as we aim to live our lives for Him, thats the important thing.
so yeah... i'm not really worried about someone else's virginity or lack thereof. None of my business anyhow.
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PeculiarTreasure
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I'm a 26 year old virgin and It doesn't bother me really. (heck, I've never even kissed a boy before 
) It's not something to be embarrassed about. It's a wonderful thing to wait till marriage. I'm sure your future hubby will appreciate it too.
I've seen so many people's lives go down the tubes due to not waiting. It's a blessing you're waiting.
) It's not something to be embarrassed about. It's a wonderful thing to wait till marriage. I'm sure your future hubby will appreciate it too.I've seen so many people's lives go down the tubes due to not waiting. It's a blessing you're waiting.
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PassionFruit
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There's nothing to be embarrassed about. It's good you're making your own decision about your sexuality. And if that means waiting until marriage that's your business.
It's good you're making your own decision about your sexuality. And if that means waiting until marriage that's your business.
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catzrfluffy
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Sketcher
Born Imperishable
I don't have any problems with being a virgin. It's part of the value system I was brought up with. I don't have to be nervous about whether I have progeny I don't know about or not. I don't have to be backed into a corner at Planned Parenthood to be tested. And I know I'm not adding to the problem of unwanted or unexpected pregnancies.
What I do have a problem with is that a lot of women it seems, expect a man my age to have done it before at least once, and most women my age have done it at least once. In this upside-down world we live in, my lack of experience may actually work against me, since a lot of experienced women seem to prefer experienced men. And preferring a woman who is inexperienced as I am is both unrealistic and looked down upon by a good amount of Christians. So to be "good enough" I would need to cheapen myself and get experience with someone not my wife. No thanks.
My virginity - the right to first intimate, romantic access to my body is worth more than that. It will be a gift to whoever I marry. It is not something to pay a prostitute to get rid of, or to get anyone else who I do not love/trust enough to marry to get rid of. God designed sex, and I want to follow his plan for it, since his plan is best. I've done a lot of things wrong, but this is one thing I can still get right. And if I don't wind up marrying someone after all, I'm sure there's some Heavenly reward for that.
What I do have a problem with is that a lot of women it seems, expect a man my age to have done it before at least once, and most women my age have done it at least once. In this upside-down world we live in, my lack of experience may actually work against me, since a lot of experienced women seem to prefer experienced men. And preferring a woman who is inexperienced as I am is both unrealistic and looked down upon by a good amount of Christians. So to be "good enough" I would need to cheapen myself and get experience with someone not my wife. No thanks.
My virginity - the right to first intimate, romantic access to my body is worth more than that. It will be a gift to whoever I marry. It is not something to pay a prostitute to get rid of, or to get anyone else who I do not love/trust enough to marry to get rid of. God designed sex, and I want to follow his plan for it, since his plan is best. I've done a lot of things wrong, but this is one thing I can still get right. And if I don't wind up marrying someone after all, I'm sure there's some Heavenly reward for that.
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StarryEyes
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I'm not embarassed about it either.. I'm more grateful than anything! Waiting is not an easy thing to do.. but God's way is always the best way!
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redwngsfan019
Regular Member
I was at first. Specially before I got saved. But ever sense I started going to church and got saved in august, I'm not embarrassed about it anymore and plan on waiting till I get married.
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Amber.ly
Predictably eccentric and honestly hypocritical
I'm not embarrassed but mostly because I hang around the conservative crowd.
When I am around people who don't believe in waiting for marriage I get the horrified looks or snide comments but those don't bug me. It's my body and that's what they keep telling me is why I shouldn't judge them. Turn around is fair play.
I'm not sure I consider my virginity a gift to my future spouse though. That is a lot of pressure for 1 night in what I hope to be a lifetime of nights. I would rather it just be a fact and to me- not having sex outside of marriage is just another way to honor my Savior. Just like tithing and singing worship. Nothing more special or weird than that.
When I am around people who don't believe in waiting for marriage I get the horrified looks or snide comments but those don't bug me. It's my body and that's what they keep telling me is why I shouldn't judge them. Turn around is fair play.
I'm not sure I consider my virginity a gift to my future spouse though. That is a lot of pressure for 1 night in what I hope to be a lifetime of nights. I would rather it just be a fact and to me- not having sex outside of marriage is just another way to honor my Savior. Just like tithing and singing worship. Nothing more special or weird than that.
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Riot Riot Riot
Guest
I regret all of the sexual stuff I've been involved in in my past.
I'd take back every bit of it if I could.
So, I don't think you really have that much to worry about. Sex (or sexual acts [excluding kissing]) before marriage just creates extremely hard to break bonds with that person.
I'd take back every bit of it if I could.
So, I don't think you really have that much to worry about. Sex (or sexual acts [excluding kissing]) before marriage just creates extremely hard to break bonds with that person.
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Agreed! I couldn't have said it better myself.
I personally do not like going around and talking about it-virgin or not, its none of their business.
As for being judged, they can get over it!
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ALiberalTeen
Guest
I'm not a virgin but I just want to say it's awesome that all of you who believe on waiting until marriage are doing just that and not giving in to peer pressure. always a highly difficult thing to do.
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Oddish
May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD.
I am not embarassed at all to be a virgin . BUT...a small part of me wonders if I am missing out on being young because everyone else my age is having sex. The rational side of me knows that way of thinking is wrong, and that it is better for me to wait. However, I can't shake that nagging fear of reaching 40 and being completely alone not having had any experience of any sort. Sometimes I think it is easier for those who become christians later on in life because at least they had a little bit of a wild side beforehand and could experiment without worrying about the consequences. Throughout most of my life, I have been the sensible one, but sometimes I want to do something crazy or let loose because I feel a little repressed. Argh...I know that is stupid thinking and I don't want to think that. I actually have two sides to me: I know that if I was to really conform to the world's standards that I would regret it and feel dirty and used.
Ever since uni has started, I felt the pressure more than ever. Two guys from my course tried to push me into things, and this guy at the ball wanted me to go off with him - I was drunk on all occasions but I still said no. All the guys made me feel like a freak for saying no.
Unfortunately, the people who know that I am a virgin, tend to see me as being righteous and judgemental and so I don't fit quite in because of that. Even being a christian seems to be taboo in this country.
. BUT...a small part of me wonders if I am missing out on being young because everyone else my age is having sex. The rational side of me knows that way of thinking is wrong, and that it is better for me to wait. However, I can't shake that nagging fear of reaching 40 and being completely alone not having had any experience of any sort. Sometimes I think it is easier for those who become christians later on in life because at least they had a little bit of a wild side beforehand and could experiment without worrying about the consequences. Throughout most of my life, I have been the sensible one, but sometimes I want to do something crazy or let loose because I feel a little repressed. Argh...I know that is stupid thinking and I don't want to think that. I actually have two sides to me: I know that if I was to really conform to the world's standards that I would regret it and feel dirty and used.Ever since uni has started, I felt the pressure more than ever. Two guys from my course tried to push me into things, and this guy at the ball wanted me to go off with him - I was drunk
on all occasions but I still said no. All the guys made me feel like a freak for saying no.Unfortunately, the people who know that I am a virgin, tend to see me as being righteous and judgemental and so I don't fit quite in because of that. Even being a christian seems to be taboo in this country.
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ProAntiRevolution
Well-Known Member
I think if you're embarrassed about it then you're making too big of a deal out of it. If you're trying to embarrass someone about it then it's also being made into too big of a deal.
There is a rather wide segment of the population that doesn't have an issue with pre-martial sex. So I'm sure if you came from that mindset it might be strange, or imply you couldn't find a willing partner. Obviously if you're not having sex for religious reasons it's a different ball game.
There is a rather wide segment of the population that doesn't have an issue with pre-martial sex. So I'm sure if you came from that mindset it might be strange, or imply you couldn't find a willing partner. Obviously if you're not having sex for religious reasons it's a different ball game.
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