Is adopting a good idea?

[Sketcher]

Some people have chosen this path and some of them have no regrets.

If you can do that, more power to you. What do you have in common with these people vs. those who do have regrets that they didn't marry first, or that they did it at all?

 

[Joined2krist]

I have a 4 years old niece who I'm currently taking care of because her mum is very busy. It is quite hard but thankfully her mum takes over when she returns. I'm having a feel of what it's like to have a child, maybe God is preparing me for it.

 

[Joined2krist]

If you can do that, more power to you. What do you have in common with these people vs. those who do have regrets that they didn't marry first, or that they did it at all?

I agree that one needs support when raising a child but don't you think that I can get it from someone else besides a husband? A grandmother perhaps can help out. Once one has at least a supportive adult helping out occasionally, it makes things easier.

 

[Sketcher]

I agree that one needs support when raising a child but don't you think that I can get it from someone else besides a husband? A grandmother perhaps can help out. Once one has at least a supportive adult helping out occasionally, it makes things easier.

Do you have someone else lined up? Who?

My cousin, while she was still with us, was a single mother. She had help from her mother and our grandmother, of course. I've seen that dynamic at work, it's not enough. I had my mother and I had my grandmother and my aunt growing up, but I also had my dad. He made it a priority to come home to us every night. I had other positive male role models, but they couldn't be around almost every evening of every day, and getting us up in the mornings (sometimes just to spend more time with us), getting us all to church every Sunday - Dad did that. Any child you would adopt needs and deserves a father figure who is that present and that consistent. Someone who's just in town and takes time out of their busy schedule to help for a few hours a week is commendable and can make a difference, but falls terribly short of the need.