- Jun 22, 2021
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- Christian
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- Single
- Politics
- CA-NDP
Hello. My name is Peter Cloutier Jabalee. Age: 30
--When I was 14 I was asked, "Do you believe in God?" and I responded, "No, I wish I could believe, but it's too hard."
I did believe in Hell, but not God, I feared Hell.
--At 19 I moved out on my own and met this overly religious girl.
She would always talk about the Bible, Revelations, Numerology and what it meant in Christianity.
--That year I chose to follow God, however with no direction ended up homeless and became mentally ill.
--From 19 (after my hospital visit) to 20 I was sain, and nothing weird happened in my life.
--The thing is, I felt like I was losing Faith, and I was afraid I might lose all belief one day.
--I thought to myself 'I have to do something so important that God will actually talk to me...
--Suddenly, for me, the lighting in the room became a million times brighter and I hadn't noticed how dim it had been.
--I chose to follow my direction, but what would be so important, God would speak with me.
--I didn't believe God actually spoke to people unless they were important, so I came up with a Plan.
--At 19 (2 months before turning 20) I had decided to smoke a Joint and allow the Devil to go inside my Body while I was High.
--I believed I could help him be forgiven. I believed he was the one and only Devil and I knew him.
--I was wrong, when I finished smoking the Joint, The Devil ran through my head making me twitch yelling "Dirty Wings! Dirty Wings! Dirty Wings!
--I was twitching so bad I ended up leaning over the bed, ready to die and I prayed instinctively, "God Please Help."
--Instantly, I turned over on my back and burped and the High was gone.
--This was the first Miracle I had ever seen. And I was thankful, but my problems were only just beginning.
--The one I call my Insanity Demons became obsessed with me, they sent me into Manic episodes and haunted me in many ways from 20-30.
--At age 25 I became possessed by a Devil shortly after finding out Ghosts were real...
--Possession was serious... Not only that, but Ghosts began to Haunt me and Taunt me.
--There are Good Ghosts and Bad Ones, but seeing someone possessed by the Devil was a Game for all of them.
--I learned how to fight with Spiritual Energy that year... But the more I fight, the more problems I have.
--At 27 I made a choice to Join Satanism as long as they helped me destroy my Insanity Demons...
--The Satanists I joined were known as Shadows (Satanic Ghosts).
--When I left, all Hell came crashing down on me.
--Since 27-30 I have been bouncing around and changing Religions.
--I went from Christian --> LaVeyan Satanism --> Christian --> Theistic Satanism
-->Christian --> Wiccan -->Setian -->Christian.
--I am currently a Christian and when I listen hard enough I know can hear God Speak... My problem now is not Belief, it's the fact that I continously go back to Satan. Sometimes for decent reasons, sometimes just because.
--I want to be a Christian forever.
--I came here, hoping to find Hope when I can't find Hope anywhere else, or a Cause to fight for.
--When I was 14 I was asked, "Do you believe in God?" and I responded, "No, I wish I could believe, but it's too hard."
I did believe in Hell, but not God, I feared Hell.
--At 19 I moved out on my own and met this overly religious girl.
She would always talk about the Bible, Revelations, Numerology and what it meant in Christianity.
--That year I chose to follow God, however with no direction ended up homeless and became mentally ill.
--From 19 (after my hospital visit) to 20 I was sain, and nothing weird happened in my life.
--The thing is, I felt like I was losing Faith, and I was afraid I might lose all belief one day.
--I thought to myself 'I have to do something so important that God will actually talk to me...
--Suddenly, for me, the lighting in the room became a million times brighter and I hadn't noticed how dim it had been.
--I chose to follow my direction, but what would be so important, God would speak with me.
--I didn't believe God actually spoke to people unless they were important, so I came up with a Plan.
--At 19 (2 months before turning 20) I had decided to smoke a Joint and allow the Devil to go inside my Body while I was High.
--I believed I could help him be forgiven. I believed he was the one and only Devil and I knew him.
--I was wrong, when I finished smoking the Joint, The Devil ran through my head making me twitch yelling "Dirty Wings! Dirty Wings! Dirty Wings!
--I was twitching so bad I ended up leaning over the bed, ready to die and I prayed instinctively, "God Please Help."
--Instantly, I turned over on my back and burped and the High was gone.
--This was the first Miracle I had ever seen. And I was thankful, but my problems were only just beginning.
--The one I call my Insanity Demons became obsessed with me, they sent me into Manic episodes and haunted me in many ways from 20-30.
--At age 25 I became possessed by a Devil shortly after finding out Ghosts were real...
--Possession was serious... Not only that, but Ghosts began to Haunt me and Taunt me.
--There are Good Ghosts and Bad Ones, but seeing someone possessed by the Devil was a Game for all of them.
--I learned how to fight with Spiritual Energy that year... But the more I fight, the more problems I have.
--At 27 I made a choice to Join Satanism as long as they helped me destroy my Insanity Demons...
--The Satanists I joined were known as Shadows (Satanic Ghosts).
--When I left, all Hell came crashing down on me.
--Since 27-30 I have been bouncing around and changing Religions.
--I went from Christian --> LaVeyan Satanism --> Christian --> Theistic Satanism
-->Christian --> Wiccan -->Setian -->Christian.
--I am currently a Christian and when I listen hard enough I know can hear God Speak... My problem now is not Belief, it's the fact that I continously go back to Satan. Sometimes for decent reasons, sometimes just because.
--I want to be a Christian forever.
--I came here, hoping to find Hope when I can't find Hope anywhere else, or a Cause to fight for.