Inter faith relationship.

[jadedjumpman]

Hi all, I'm in a very difficult spot. I've been in an inter faith relationship for a few months. Yet we know due to our country's strict laws, we have no future. And yes I've read many times on how I should not take part in a relationship that has no pathway to marriage. However what is done is done. I decided to tell my parents about this relationship I've kept hidden. They wanted me to break up immediately. My girlfriend who has treated me so well and cared for me just left for her studies quite a distance away yesterday. She felt very hurt by the fact I broke up with her on the first day she left. While I can be there for her as a friend, this is very hurtful to her and I understand why. I honestly cannot bear to see her this hurt. I am trying to convince my parents to at least give us some time to break up when it will not be so hard on either of us. Please advise and help me on how I can explain to my parents.

 

[Not David]

Hi all, I'm in a very difficult spot. I've been in an inter faith relationship for a few months. Yet we know due to our country's strict laws, we have no future. And yes I've read many times on how I should not take part in a relationship that has no pathway to marriage. However what is done is done. I decided to tell my parents about this relationship I've kept hidden. They wanted me to break up immediately. My girlfriend who has treated me so well and cared for me just left for her studies quite a distance away yesterday. She felt very hurt by the fact I broke up with her on the first day she left. While I can be there for her as a friend, this is very hurtful to her and I understand why. I honestly cannot bear to see her this hurt. I am trying to convince my parents to at least give us some time to break up when it will not be so hard on either of us. Please advise and help me on how I can explain to my parents.

What's her faith?

 

[jadedjumpman]

What's her faith?

As by law required in Malaysia she is a Muslim, but I could not tell you if she's one because of the legal fact or because she chooses to be.

 

[chevyontheriver]

As by law required in Malaysia she is a Muslim, but I could not tell you if she's one because of the legal fact or because she chooses to be.

Is it legal for her to become a Christian?

 

[Radagast]

Hi all, I'm in a very difficult spot. I've been in an inter faith relationship for a few months.

There would be no future for such a relationship unless she became a Christian. And that would require leaving the country.

I can't see any other option than to just let her go.

 

[chevyontheriver]

There would be no future for such a relationship unless she became a Christian. And that would require leaving the country.

I can't see any other option than to just let her go.

Some countries might accept her as a refugee from religious persecution if she converts and there is a backlash. Probably not the USA, which in past years has been very unfriendly to Christians trying to escape persecution.

 

[jadedjumpman]

It is not legal. And yes I know that I have to. My question was how do I tell my parents that I need the time to do so as now is definitely a difficult time for her. We have both known from the beginning and told each other we have no future throughout the relationship. She just wants the time as she is very alone and in a new place now.

 

[Radagast]

Some countries might accept her as a refugee from religious persecution if she converts and there is a backlash.

There generally is a backlash in Malaysia. But even without refugee status, many countries do accept immigrants from Malaysia.

 

[chevyontheriver]

It is not legal. And yes I know that I have to. My question was how do I tell my parents that I need the time to do so as now is definitely a difficult time for her. We have both known from the beginning and told each other we have no future throughout the relationship. She just wants the time as she is very alone and in a new place now.

I think it is rude that your country has such a policy. But it's your country and I have no say in what your country does. God would allow it even if your country does not. Pray for that.

And yet you also seem to know that there is no future for this relationship. So do break it off.

You don't need to cut off everything with her though, like rudely dumping her. You can still ask her how she is doing, and that sort of thing. Maybe your parents can actually guide you in how to nicely let her go.

 

[Radagast]

It is not legal. And yes I know that I have to. My question was how do I tell my parents that I need the time to do so as now is definitely a difficult time for her.

I see where you're coming from -- that you feel that she needs your friendship.

And I see where your parents are coming from -- continuing the relationship will just make it more difficult (for both of you) when it stops.

I'm afraid I have no good advice.

We have both known from the beginning and told each other we have no future throughout the relationship.

So why.... Never mind. I guess we've all done things like that.

 

[jadedjumpman]

I think it is rude that your country has such a policy. But it's your country and I have no say in what your country does. God would allow it even if your country does not. Pray for that.

And yet you also seem to know that there is no future for this relationship. So do break it off.

You don't need to cut off everything with her though, like rudely dumping her. You can still ask her how she is doing, and that sort of thing. Maybe your parents can actually guide you in how to nicely let her go.

Thank you. This is exactly what I want. And trust me when I say I agree with what you said about my country. And I also do pray for God's help even if it seems impossible because everything is possible through God. I do very much intend on caring for her and being her friend. I've talked to my parents and they seem, albeit reluctant, agreeable to letting me take some time. Prayers for my situation and getting over this will be appreciated. She has contributed an insane amount to who I am as a person today and I will forever be grateful for that. Thank you so much for replying.

 

[jadedjumpman]

I see where you're coming from -- that you feel that she needs your friendship.

And I see where your parents are coming from -- continuing the relationship will just make it more difficult (for both of you) when it stops.

I'm afraid I have no good advice.



So why.... Never mind. I guess we've all done things like that.

Yes. It is true. But my feelings for her were strong and we thought a period of having each other before we had to move on would be good. I as many others have made mistakes. I can only pray now.

 

[Radagast]

I can only pray now.

And I'm praying for you, brother.

 

[PeterDona]

She has contributed an insane amount to who I am as a person today and I will forever be grateful for that.

hmm... the law of investment. You have invested yourself into her, and as a result right now you feel totally into her. When you annul your investment, you will realize ...

But for women, such an action comes with tears.

Next time you can know how to evaluate in advance if the relationship has a chance. God bless

 

[faroukfarouk]

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