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Innocence

JPPT1974

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lunalinda said:
Oh man...I'm innocent AND naive.

:doh:

And no, I'm not serious. :p

I'd say I'm definitely more innocent than naive, but I still harbor just a little bit naivety. Both of them come from my sheltered life, however. Slowly but surely, I'm breaking away, though. At least I think I am. :scratch:

And anyway, much of my innocence is by choice. The naivety will continue to fade as I more progress in leaving this shell of mine. As far as whether or not I'm attractive to guys because of my innocence? Well, I dunno. It depends.

To the wrong guys, I'd be more of a challenge (since I'm so very protective of myself, not naive to the fact that there are still a lot of guys who play a nice role just to get into my pants, which unfortunately tends to merely fuel a lot of guys to try harder), so I guess that's an attraction all its own. To the right guys, I just HOPE it'd be attractive, my not harboring some of the "ugliness" in the world. Tough part is finding the difference in those guys. Some of them have such flawless disguises.

I never really thought about the other way around, though, whether or not I'd be attracted to an "innocent" guy, since I've yet to be attracted to one haha. I don't mean that in a bad way, just stating how it's been. But it certainly would be a refreshing surprise.

I am thirty years old and still innocent and naive but not as bad as I use to be as I am so protetive of not just my private life but also my sexuality and virginity. I want to be attractive not just on the outside but also on the inside most of all first and foremost. Sometimes I feel as though I have to wear a "disguise" myself just to please other people when I just need to act like myself.
 
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MrDude

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I'm scared of "innocent" girls. I just feel that they are too good for me to even talk to, let alone pursue something romantic with. I'm just so worried that I won't measure up, that I won't be good enough, which kind sucks because innocent girls are the ones I'm most attracted to.

I suppose I'm sort of "innocent" compared to the world's standards, as I've never done drugs and never drank, and never had sex (though I'm most certainly not naive, and I've got more than my fair share of sin and blasphemy, unfortunatly), but I still feel like I'm just not good enough for them.
 
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Sketcher

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It really depends on her intelligence and the rest of her character. Some experiences in life forge your character so that you can be more wise and caring.

Innocence is attractive to me because then the woman seems more approachable. I was fairly sheltered growing up (but not totally). It is really nice to talk with women like that - however, I would be concerned with corrupting her. Sometimes when she doesn't get some slang that most of us take for granted it can get a little awkward :blush: . At the same time there is general concern, as people prey on it. But innocence is a rare treasure these days - it will be lost, it depends who you lose it to. Someone who loves you and teaches you the easy way, or someone who takes advatage of you and hurts you in the process.
 
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Fatolia

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I still don't understand this whole "innocence" thing. We're all sinners, and every single woman I've ever met has something in her life she feels either guilty or ashamed of (unless she's surrendered it to Jesus, of course...that's extremely cool). So what are you talking about?
 
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justasinner

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lunalinda said:
Oh man...I'm innocent AND naive.

:doh:

And no, I'm not serious. :p

I'd say I'm definitely more innocent than naive, but I still harbor just a little bit naivety. Both of them come from my sheltered life, however. Slowly but surely, I'm breaking away, though. At least I think I am. :scratch:

And anyway, much of my innocence is by choice. The naivety will continue to fade as I more progress in leaving this shell of mine. As far as whether or not I'm attractive to guys because of my innocence? Well, I dunno. It depends.
...
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To me innocence is very attractive, it stands the test of time. That is, the lady has pass a number of test that God and society has given her. Which means her walk with God is strong. And that is someone that I want in my life either as a very close friend or better yet a spouse. And any true Christian man should want the same.:holy:

As for me my innocence is an open book. It can be seen by all and I only hope that the ladies consider that attractive.:blush:
 
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the_man

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Fatolia said:
I still don't understand this whole "innocence" thing. We're all sinners, and every single woman I've ever met has something in her life she feels either guilty or ashamed of (unless she's surrendered it to Jesus, of course...that's extremely cool). So what are you talking about?

That's why I haven't commented...until we have a sufficient enough definition of what you (krstg) mean by innocence, I cannot give you an informed reply.
 
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krstg

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the_man said:
That's why I haven't commented...until we have a sufficient enough definition of what you (krstg) mean by innocence, I cannot give you an informed reply.

Earlier I tried to define what I thought "innocence" is with what I believed people would consider to be qualities of an innocent person. But, it looks like everyone has a there own idea of innocence... So, let me start over with my personal definition of innocence (in the context of dating, that is).

krstg's definition of INNOCENCE (or INNOCENT):

* not having experience in any of the following: sex, drugs, excessive drinking of alcoholic beverages, partying (which incudes any or all of the preceding things)
* does not pursue activities or conversations that include the above topics. When there is a converation, she will say something like "I'm not into that", "I stay away from those things", "Oh, I haven't been exposed to all of that" or "Yikes! You better be careful".
* has not had a boyfriend; had not dated (or dated very much)

Do you all pretty much agree or disagree with my idea of innocence? If not, how do you define innocence? Furthermore, would you like innocence, be it your definition or my definition, in a girlfriend?

I know this is geared towards the fellows, but the gals are free to keep adding their comments.
 
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JPPT1974

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PetraFan007 said:
I think innocence is one of the most attractive aspects of a woman.

It seems that women want to portray themselves of being more innocence than that of men. Guess it's a character issue in my opinion!!
 
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Grunt

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Well, if "innocent" means that she wants stay in her own sheltered world, then I wouldn't be interested. I want a girl who's interested in learning, trying new things and seeing what's out there in life. I think, or at least hope, that it's possible to have an attractive innocence yet a desire do those things.

Besides, just imagine the fun if you take her home on your wedding night, sweep her off her feet to the bedroom... and she says, "Wait a minute, you want to do WHAT?!!" :doh:
 
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the_man

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krstg said:
krstg's definition of INNOCENCE (or INNOCENT):

* not having experience in any of the following: sex, drugs, excessive drinking of alcoholic beverages, partying (which incudes any or all of the preceding things)
* does not pursue activities or conversations that include the above topics. When there is a converation, she will say something like "I'm not into that", "I stay away from those things", "Oh, I haven't been exposed to all of that" or "Yikes! You better be careful".
* has not had a boyfriend; had not dated (or dated very much)

That is much better. And when you define innocence like that, few men would say it is an undesirable trait. That is from your definition, the notion of naivity is removed.

krstg said:
Do you all pretty much agree or disagree with my idea of innocence? If not, how do you define innocence? Furthermore, would you like innocence, be it your definition or my definition, in a girlfriend?

Whether we agree or disagree with your idea is of little consequence. It is more important that we understand what you mean.
 
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born2run

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The above post would pretty well describe me. I'm not dumb...I had a sister that went through all that stuff (and has two illegitimate kids as a result). I don't have any desire to do any of that.

On the other hand, I've went through a lot of other things that have long ago stripped me of a trusting innocent nature. So...what I seem to be, I am not. ;)
 
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waterbear

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Grunt said:
Well, if "innocent" means that she wants stay in her own sheltered world, then I wouldn't be interested. I want a girl who's interested in learning, trying new things and seeing what's out there in life. I think, or at least hope, that it's possible to have an attractive innocence yet a desire do those things.

Besides, just imagine the fun if you take her home on your wedding night, sweep her off her feet to the bedroom... and she says, "Wait a minute, you want to do WHAT?!!" :doh:

Now that's the sort of person I'd be attracted to :) Those characterizations fit a reserved/private profile more than an innocent one though.
 
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Niels

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I find the honesty and good will of innocence attractive. It makes kind-hearted sharing and trust possible.

According to my take on the definition, innocence has as much to do with intent as circumstances. If somebody has been hurt, I think they can still be innocent. Innocence can be active rather than simply passive. If she's innocent, she'll be more straight-forward and less prone to manipulative behavior. I won't have to do as much guessing about ulterior motives, as might be required if she's less innocent. Granted, I'm tossing a little idealism into the mix... but I think idealism and innocence are definitely compatible. Come to think of it, innocence may not even be able to survive without a little idealism.
 
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PastorJer

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Innocence for me is something that is very attractive when it comes to dating...

I have not saved myself for someone who has had experience - I desire ultimate purity for the marriage bed that my wife and I will share - that is not to say that I desire someone without knowledge, but rather someone without personal experience.

And I will never date a person unless they are a potential mate...
 
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Grunt

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krstg said:
krstg's definition of INNOCENCE (or INNOCENT):

* not having experience in any of the following: sex, drugs, excessive drinking of alcoholic beverages, partying (which incudes any or all of the preceding things)
* does not pursue activities or conversations that include the above topics. When there is a converation, she will say something like "I'm not into that", "I stay away from those things", "Oh, I haven't been exposed to all of that" or "Yikes! You better be careful".
* has not had a boyfriend; had not dated (or dated very much)

Doh, I missed this before, gotta read more carefully...

Anyway, I like the sound of that kind of girl :thumbsup:
 
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krstg

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the_man said:
That is much better. And when you define innocence like that, few men would say it is an undesirable trait.
Thanks, and glad to read your reply.

the_man said:
Whether we agree or disagree with your idea is of little consequence. It is more important that we understand what you mean.
That makes sense for the purpose of this thread. :)
 
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