The power of personal, selfish impulse, and thoughts the devil puts in one's head (or at least, in my head) override knowledge of God's truth, facts and logic.
When I was a teenager, my older brother became a Christian and started talking about God, the Bible, etc. I remember at one point, asking him, if you become one of God's people, does God then give you a nice life? My brother responded with stuff about suffering, etc. From that point on, for the next several decades, until fairly recently, I had the idea that God is into tormenting us because we are sinners. It's either, become a Christian and suffer unbearable torment now, and go to heaven when you die, or don't become a Christian, enjoy the now, don't suffer, and endure unbearable torment after you die, in hell. It's natural to choose delay of torment, it's natural to choose not to become a Christian.
That misunderstanding has been cleared up for me, recently. But there is still this concept that God wants us to be miserable now, and have enjoyment after we die, and Satan wants us to enjoy life now, and go to hell after we die. With such an understanding one (or I) steer clear of becoming a Christian. Since the typical Christian does not report being most of the time miserable, one (or I) should be able to see this and ignore the lie from Satan. But he can convince one (or me) that, well, for ME, the Christian life will be terrible and miserable, regardless of what Christians witness.
I just read that one needs to surrender to the Holy Spirit to have motives that please God. ("Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.")
In looking at the possibility that I have never yet become a Christian, and that all my "attempts" to become one are fake, I realize that it may be that I have not shaken the lie that God wants us to be miserable now, if we're going to have enjoyment in eternity. The facts include info from verses such as that that reads, 'all things work together for good for those who love God,' etc. Being told that God loves me may offer me cold comfort, because a parent can do things to a child, because they love the child, that the child may not like, may find "unbearable" for the time being.
I know I should learn from what I've heard that God loves and wants the best for me. That He does not offer a trade-off between pure misery now and enjoyment later. But the power of self-protective impulse, and of Satan's lies, may not disappear overnight, or without a struggle.
When I was a teenager, my older brother became a Christian and started talking about God, the Bible, etc. I remember at one point, asking him, if you become one of God's people, does God then give you a nice life? My brother responded with stuff about suffering, etc. From that point on, for the next several decades, until fairly recently, I had the idea that God is into tormenting us because we are sinners. It's either, become a Christian and suffer unbearable torment now, and go to heaven when you die, or don't become a Christian, enjoy the now, don't suffer, and endure unbearable torment after you die, in hell. It's natural to choose delay of torment, it's natural to choose not to become a Christian.
That misunderstanding has been cleared up for me, recently. But there is still this concept that God wants us to be miserable now, and have enjoyment after we die, and Satan wants us to enjoy life now, and go to hell after we die. With such an understanding one (or I) steer clear of becoming a Christian. Since the typical Christian does not report being most of the time miserable, one (or I) should be able to see this and ignore the lie from Satan. But he can convince one (or me) that, well, for ME, the Christian life will be terrible and miserable, regardless of what Christians witness.
I just read that one needs to surrender to the Holy Spirit to have motives that please God. ("Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.")
In looking at the possibility that I have never yet become a Christian, and that all my "attempts" to become one are fake, I realize that it may be that I have not shaken the lie that God wants us to be miserable now, if we're going to have enjoyment in eternity. The facts include info from verses such as that that reads, 'all things work together for good for those who love God,' etc. Being told that God loves me may offer me cold comfort, because a parent can do things to a child, because they love the child, that the child may not like, may find "unbearable" for the time being.
I know I should learn from what I've heard that God loves and wants the best for me. That He does not offer a trade-off between pure misery now and enjoyment later. But the power of self-protective impulse, and of Satan's lies, may not disappear overnight, or without a struggle.
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