Im afraid of death.

[Neostarwcc]

First off I'd like to mention, I'm not afraid of hell or a horrifying afterlife. If I had ever went to hell I know that I would deserve to be there and that I would get the just punishment that I deserve. I'm not worried about that, I have solid confidence that I will enter glory when my final second on this world is up and God finally calls me home. I am afraid of the process. I like Sproul was for a while am afraid of the process of death. How will I die? Will I suffer? Will I die alone or will I have my wife by my side?

Two years ago I thought my final moments were up when I needed emergency surgery or the massive blood clot in my heart would go to my brain and would very likely kill me pretty instantly. I had almost tasted death and I have to tell you, I was terrified the entire time until they put me under. I was terrified when they told me that on top of having blood clots literally everywhere else there also was one in my heart. I was terrified on the ambulence ride from New York to New Jersey because New Jersey was the closest hospital I could go to that could do the surgery and had room to take me. I was terrified during the two day long wait before my surgery. I was terrified that the clot would go to my brain before they got to operate on me. I was terrified all the way and I was especially terrified when I was in the Surgery room and they were prepping me for surgery. I've told this story countless times on here because it's a great story so I won't bore you with the details. Just basically need to know that, I survived and God saved my life. (Duh or I wouldn't be talking to you today lol)


I have known nothing but suffering in my life so, i guess i should not be surprised that I will probably suffer when my final moments are up. This just terrifies me. I don't know what God has planned for me i can only take my life one day at a time. But I'm at the point in my life where I am just terrified of the entire process.

I want to be like Sproul was on his deathbed. He knew he was going to die and he knew that he would meet Jesus and according to what I've heard, he wasn't afraid anymore of death. I want to be like that. I want my last words to be meaningful like his were and give my wife some closure because odds are, I don't have much more time left in this world. I don't take care of myself, I weigh over 400 pounds, and I'm definitely at high risk of getting deadly blood clots again and I don't think God would save my life every single time. From the very moment I was born into this world God has saved my life. I was born blue (not breathing) for several minutes. Back in the 80s they didn't have the technology they do today to save a baby not breathing. They thought i wouldn't survive but they luckily got me breathing again. I suffered brain damage but, I'm alive (again, duh or I wouldn't be talking lol).

When I was about two years old I swallowed a penny and nearly suffocated to death. Had my sister not screamed and my mom not known what to do to get the penny out of my windpipe I wouldn't be talking to you today. God has saved my life probably countless times and more times than even I remember. But eventually my luck is going to run out a and it will be time. Probably sometime sooner than I expect.

I don't want my wife to miss me. I mean, she obviously is going to be sad if she was ever at my deathbed. But I want her to be encouraged that, I'm going to a fantastic and wonderful place. And one day, we will see each other again. I don't want to be afraid anymore and I don't want to have to be on my actual deathbed to actually stop being afraid. I know it's completely normal to be afraid of death but, I don't want to be afraid of it. Odds are I'm going to suffer and odds are I'm going to spend the entire time thanking God even until my last words on this earth.


Dunno what I'm trying to ask. Just, how do I get over this I guess? I don't want to be normal I want to be fearless and face my death like every other devoted child of God. Without fear and being glad that the suffering is finally going to stop. Dunno... probably just being a baby.

 

[AlexB23]

First off I'd like to mention, I'm not afraid of hell or a horrifying afterlife. If I had ever went to hell I know that I would deserve to be there and that I would get the just punishment that I deserve. I'm not worried about that, I have solid confidence that I will enter glory when my final second on this world is up and God finally calls me home. I am afraid of the process. I like Sproul was for a while am afraid of the process of death. How will I die? Will I suffer? Will I die alone or will I have my wife by my side?

Two years ago I thought my final moments were up when I needed emergency surgery or the massive blood clot in my heart would go to my brain and would very likely kill me pretty instantly. I had almost tasted death and I have to tell you, I was terrified the entire time until they put me under. I was terrified when they told me that on top of having blood clots literally everywhere else there also was one in my heart. I was terrified on the ambulence ride from New York to New Jersey because New Jersey was the closest hospital I could go to that could do the surgery and had room to take me. I was terrified during the two day long wait before my surgery. I was terrified that the clot would go to my brain before they got to operate on me. I was terrified all the way and I was especially terrified when I was in the Surgery room and they were prepping me for surgery. I've told this story countless times on here because it's a great story so I won't bore you with the details. Just basically need to know that, I survived and God saved my life. (Duh or I wouldn't be talking to you today lol)


I have known nothing but suffering in my life so, i guess i should not be surprised that I will probably suffer when my final moments are up. This just terrifies me. I don't know what God has planned for me i can only take my life one day at a time. But I'm at the point in my life where I am just terrified of the entire process.

I want to be like Sproul was on his deathbed. He knew he was going to die and he knew that he would meet Jesus and according to what I've heard, he wasn't afraid anymore of death. I want to be like that. I want my last words to be meaningful like his were and give my wife some closure because odds are, I don't have much more time left in this world. I don't take care of myself, I weigh over 400 pounds, and I'm definitely at high risk of getting deadly blood clots again and I don't think God would save my life every single time. From the very moment I was born into this world God has saved my life. I was born blue (not breathing) for several minutes. Back in the 80s they didn't have the technology they do today to save a baby not breathing. They thought i wouldn't survive but they luckily got me breathing again. I suffered brain damage but, I'm alive (again, duh or I wouldn't be talking lol).

When I was about two years old I swallowed a penny and nearly suffocated to death. Had my sister not screamed and my mom not known what to do to get the penny out of my windpipe I wouldn't be talking to you today. God has saved my life probably countless times and more times than even I remember. But eventually my luck is going to run out a and it will be time. Probably sometime sooner than I expect.

I don't want my wife to miss me. I mean, she obviously is going to be sad if she was ever at my deathbed. But I want her to be encouraged that, I'm going to a fantastic and wonderful place. And one day, we will see each other again. I don't want to be afraid anymore and I don't want to have to be on my actual deathbed to actually stop being afraid. I know it's completely normal to be afraid of death but, I don't want to be afraid of it. Odds are I'm going to suffer and odds are I'm going to spend the entire time thanking God even until my last words on this earth.


Dunno what I'm trying to ask. Just, how do I get over this I guess? I don't want to be normal I want to be fearless and face my death like every other devoted child of God. Without fear and being glad that the suffering is finally going to stop. Dunno... probably just being a baby.

Don't be scared bro. God has a plan, and a short period of pain will be met afterwards with the joy of heaven above. But hey, almost everyone has thought of this deep question at least once. For folks with kids, people would ask this: "If I die at a young age, how will my kids take care of themselves?", but for folks without kids, the question would be this: "If I die young, why do I regret not doing enough to turn others to Christ?", while another question would be: "Did I make a difference on people, and showed them the way to Christ?", or "it seems too early to go".

There are plenty of ways people pass. Maybe it is that one dude in that lifted Ford pickup truck with monster truck sized tires who always cuts you off when on the highway, and this time you did not have enough time to brake (I don't drive, but every day I go to work, there are at least two or three folks who cut my taxi off). Same thing on road trips with my parents. Other ways of death include old age, cancer, victim of violence or purposely choosing to do risky stuff, such as driving a rental car fast on the German highway on a rainy day and losing control, overdosing on drugs, falling from great heights or self harm.

In other words, do not worry about how you are going to pass away, cos the temporary pain of passing leads to everlasting life with God as a Christian. Also, who is this Mr. Sproul guy? I live under a rock.

Edit (2023-12-09 at 7:17 PM): Final thoughts here for you, is that you seek a Christian psychologist, if possible, and discuss the topic of the fear of dying also with your wife. Quick natural deaths are always the best (pro-life Christian guy in his 20s here, assisted deaths are an abomination and against my ethics), or accidental ones also that were not your fault, but if a slower death happens, God will guide you safely through it, and maybe some painkillers could help, as long as you take the proper dosage as recommended by doctors. But hey, this is in the future. Focus on getting support from a psychologist or pastor/priest.

 

[Jay Freeman]

No one knows when their last day on earth will be. You are wise to live your life one day at a time. Of course, as Christians, we don't actually die. We are eternal. When I was younger, I almost died as well but the weird thing was that the adrenaline and fear came after I was out of danger and realized what had almost happened.

You might try looking for near death experience videos.

Here's one that I found interesting although I do keep a skeptical perspective when watching them.

 

[com7fy8]

So, you could have died already but didn't. This can show that God is in control of when you die and how.

I would say share with your wife. Talk about what she is feeling and what she thinks and feels about death.

When you went unconscious, that could be like when we die; but when we die, we go unconscious to this life and discover how we wake up to our next life.

How we are in our character has a lot to do with how we will become after we die. So, I would say prepare to die well . . . including being mature in love which does not fear and is creative to use things of life and death for loving.

Fear is a very dirty trick to keep our attention elsewhere. So, trust God to change you into how His love is.

 

[com7fy8]

I like Sproul was for a while am afraid of the process of death. How will I die? Will I suffer? Will I die alone or will I have my wife by my side?

So, what does Sproul say helped him?

For me, personally, I have all along been told not to be afraid to die because if I die I can go to Heaven which is so better. I was told this in Catholic classes as a kid.

And now I am with Jesus and God's word. And not only am I not to fear death, but we are clearly told not to allow any fear, at all, I would say, going by 1 John 4:18 >

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love." (1 John 4:18)

And Jesus says that when we see end-time major disasters, "See that you are not troubled," Jesus says in Matthew 24:6.

Plus, Jesus wants to share His own peace with us, instead >

"'Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.'" (John 14:27)

So, this is not just some philosophical and theoretical thing. But Jesus wants to share with us in His own peace which is His peace, therefore the peace which Jesus Himself enjoys and experiences, in His love. This is personal, with Jesus Himself in us.

But human love is weak so we can get into fearing about only certain people and ourselves. So it is practical, then, to be corrected in our character so we are strong in Jesus with His immunity almighty against the cruelty and deception of fear and worry.

"Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might." (Ephesians 6:10)

Jesus is our way > here is more >

"Inasmuch then as the children have partaken of flesh and blood, He Himself likewise shared in the same, that through death He might destroy him who had the power of death, that is, the devil, and release those who through fear of death were all their lifetime subject to bondage." (Hebrews 2:14-15)

So, it is very clear, here, how "fear of death" is slavery to Satan. This, then, is not only some philosophical intellectual idea thing. Jesus Christ is the Lord of all, and He has gone through death on the cross, partly in order to defeat Satan and the power of "fear of death", and Jesus is the One who can deliver us from such treachery and cruelty of Satan's slavery to fear.

But - - - we want to stay here, on this earth, however God pleases. Because here we can reach and help others, like Paul shows with his own example >

"For I am hard-pressed between the two, having a desire to depart and be with Christ, which is far better. Nevertheless to remain in the flesh is more needful for you." (Philippians 1:23-24)

So, Paul's reason for staying in this life was not because he was afraid to die, but he had his love reason to stay here . . . so he could help people, ministering to us.

 

[Neostarwcc]

No one knows when their last day on earth will be. You are wise to live your life one day at a time. Of course, as Christians, we don't actually die. We are eternal. When I was younger, I almost died as well but the weird thing was that the adrenaline and fear came after I was out of danger and realized what had almost happened.

You might try looking for near death experience videos.

Here's one that I found interesting although I do keep a skeptical perspective when watching them.

Idk how accurate NDEs are. There are people who claim to have seen the Muslim version of Heaven ...etc. And the Christ centered ones are mostly all clearly fake because what they have witnessed doesn't align with what the Bible teaches about the afterlife.

Jesus's famous words of "those who believe in me will live even though they die." Always makes me tear up lol.

 

[com7fy8]

And the Christ centered ones are mostly all clearly fake because what they have witnessed doesn't align with what the Bible teaches about the afterlife.

Ones I have heard about can say the person dies and sees his or her loved ones.

But Jesus says,

"if you love those who love you, what reward have you?" in Matthew 5:46.

So, I consider that in the presence of Jesus we mainly will be attentive to Jesus and we will be loving all our family in Jesus, and not only be concerned about certain favorite people we had in this life.

There are ones who now can so impress us and have us loving them so dearly, but they are not like Jesus the way we will be in Heaven. With Jesus we won't be like we are now. We won't be so impressed with how ones now might have been for us, I would say.

So, I would advise that we humble ourselves and our loved ones and special friends, and seek in prayer that we become more mature and conformed to Jesus.

And instead of being afraid of death, be busy with our attention to growing in Christ and helping each other be ready to die right, and minister for one another to become more maturely how Jesus is > if certain ones are such great people, we all still need to grow more so we are ready. Do not fear death, then, but do be busy with using the time we have, for ministry . . . and not only for trying to control how long we have on this earth.

 

[LovebirdsFlying]

Again I turn to the life of Corrie ten Boom. As a child, when she discovered the concept of death, she ran to her father, terrified to know that one day she was going to die. Her father drew an analogy. When they travel by train, they need two tickets. When does he give her hers? Right before they get on. Until then, he carries it for her. It's the same way with God and death, her father said. Right now, her Father God is holding her ticket to death. When her time comes, God will give her the strength and courage she needs, right before she boards the train.

I hope that made sense, and that it helps.

 

[I's2C]

My very first thought was what JESUS says.
Mat 6:34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

You cant worry about what will or will not happen. Live life as the best Christian you can be. Putting so much energy and time into fears does no one any good, want add one minute to your life. CHRIST new exactly how HE was going to die but went through it all without a whimper; preaching and saving till HIS very last breath. Worry about how you are going to die will just bring sorrow and stress. Just live like there is no tomorrow laying your legacy for glorification to GOD. Getting rewards in heaven instead on earth. When I go I just want everyone to say he was a good man and would do anything to help someone.
Storing up rewards in heaven when CHRIST will say well done good and faithful servant. I know that this life is just a blink of an eye compared to eternity. Any pain in this life want even be a memory once we pass for we will be in our spiritual bodies that only GOD can destroy with a consuming fire. I already know I most likely will have a painful death but I cant wait for my Ruach where there will be no more pain, sorrow or a flesh body that ages and gets sick. I want heaven to come but not before I fill my destiny GOD has in store for me, I don't want to disappoint HIM.

 

[AlexB23]

Again I turn to the life of Corrie ten Boom. As a child, when she discovered the concept of death, she ran to her father, terrified to know that one day she was going to die. Her father drew an analogy. When they travel by train, they need two tickets. When does he give her hers? Right before they get on. Until then, he carries it for her. It's the same way with God and death, her father said. Right now, her Father God is holding her ticket to death. When her time comes, God will give her the strength and courage she needs, right before she boards the train.

I hope that made sense, and that it helps.

Corrie ten Boom had a lot of wisdom, and I have watched a documentary about her on New Years of 2023. The train ticket analogy by her father is good, though the documentary never touched on that, as the show focused on her forgiveness of others and her Christianity. Jesus holds the ticket to everlasting life for us, and we accept that ticket into our hearts, so that when we board the train, we may use said ticket. The process of boarding the train (cancer, accident, or old age) can be difficult, but just think of that as boarding a train on a stormy evening*.

But for the OP, death can be a heavy topic. I don't think about death, but our family's old dog died in January 2021, then the cat in April 2021, then my grandfather on Christmas 2021, so that was a heavy year. And crazy to think about, the end of 2021 was closer to 2080 compared to 1962 was to 2021. I will be 81 in late 2080, barring an accident, vehicle crash or natural disaster (impulsive guy here with ADHD, so luckily I don't drive), but will always maintain my faith in Jesus.

*Back to the train analogy, the station may be covered by trash and litter left over by dying cells in our body (such as cancer, memory loss, etc), and be located in the middle of a category 4 storm (dying at a young age from an accident or unhealthy habits), but God will make sure you get on the train to heaven, even though the station may be in a difficult area of your lives.

 

[Neostarwcc]

Again I turn to the life of Corrie ten Boom. As a child, when she discovered the concept of death, she ran to her father, terrified to know that one day she was going to die. Her father drew an analogy. When they travel by train, they need two tickets. When does he give her hers? Right before they get on. Until then, he carries it for her. It's the same way with God and death, her father said. Right now, her Father God is holding her ticket to death. When her time comes, God will give her the strength and courage she needs, right before she boards the train.

I hope that made sense, and that it helps.

Thank you that helped. I did not hear that story of her life but I have heard all of her conversations that she did for TV in the 70s and 80s and also knew about her life in prison and how she hid the Jews before she got arrested. I knew that she hid the Jews in her bedroom and ive seen the house she grew up in (not physically but I saw it on TV)