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Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
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CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
I'll give this a try..
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Emotional sadomasochism is a term used for people who enjoy emotional suffering.
For example, some people enjoy being emotionally humiliated and insulted by a woman. Likewise this same individual can enjoy humiliating and insulting the same woman.
Playful teasing is a light form of emotional S&M. Something that you can see in many relationships. It's even viewed as something cute by many people.
Other like myself, can get large amounts of emotional S&M from religion. People like me tend to drift to the fire and brimstone versions of religion. Because deep down we enjoy the emotional guilt and pain that can come from feeling like a worthless sinner, and the fear that one might wind up in hell. This is generally the darkest form of emotional S&M, and something many in the BDSM community denounce and try to warn others about.
Some people are more sensitive to emotional S&M than others. While some are content with mild forms of emotional S&M, others need the harder stuff. I view it like alcohol. Most people are moderate drinkers, while a few people are unfortunately prone to alcoholism.
I hope this post helps you understand the term a little better. Even in the BDSM community some people still don't know what emotional S&M is. I myself haven't heard of the term until 2010. Even though I've been a strong one all my life. It really is nice to have a term that adequately explains a lot of my behaviors and interests.
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Can a person actually enjoy a masochistic behavior and honestly say that they want to be treated in the same way? I hardly doubt it. I find a deeper struggle that prides itself in how much it has endured and is very very porud, a hidden secret that stems from an 'Im better than you' mentality. Like a, 'I want to be a macho man, in secret' complex. Priding itself into thinking they are superior.
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Do you attend a college/university? If so, what is your lured study? Or course of study.
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- Jul 23, 2007
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Elitism exists in all subcultures, and is definitely present in the S&M subculture.
In many S&M circles there is a tendency of people to show off how sadomasochistic they are. There is even bullying and intimidation to be more and more extreme.
I find myself to possess some of these negative traits, and I am trying to stop them. There was a period in my life where I hated the idea of any type of love in a relationship, and thought I should eradicate as much of it out of my life as possible. I've since learned that such thought patterns are unhealthy.
No, the enjoyment of masochism is much more than someone simply enjoying the pride that comes along with taking the pain. The reasons people enjoy masochism are numerous and diverse. Many enjoy it "just because", anything else is just an added bonus.
Most of my life I wasn't even aware that I was an emotional [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse], so I never even thought to take pride in it. Many more people find their desires shameful, much less something to have pride in.
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Just to find a common ground, dont you think if a person is enjoying harming another, they may be ignorant or premeditated, still feel a sense of superiority, or comfort in harming others. Yet when suffering the same pain, are angry at those doing such a deed against them?
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What? Why is it ignorant? If you're engaging in S&M, it better be consensual. If someone only likes the sadist role, that's their business. I don't see how that makes them ignorant, or hypocritical or whatever you're talking about.
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Treating others the way you would'nt want to be treated is either normal or very abnormal.
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Strider1002
For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Is it possible that a lot of people are into emotional S&M, at different levels, and they don't realize it? Like, women who say they want a "nice guy" but always date jerks who mistreat them. Some people just seem to be more comfortable with emotional distress.
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I apologize for the late reply..
I do believe that many women are attracted to jerks because they like the abuse. Many women openly admit this on the emotional S&M forum I attend. Despite what others say, these attractions are very real. Sadly I have faced heat for voicing these opinions. People assumed I was saying this stuff to justify the abuse of women. While on the contrary I was saing this to wake women up about dangerous mindsets. Men fall victim to this too, but on the whole I see this happening to women much more. Perhaps its cultural, perhaps it's genetic or a mix of both, I don't know.
Just because a woman happens to like the abuse doesn't mean the guy is off the hook. If I were a judge I'd send the woman to a mental hospital and give the guy the harshest sentence possible. Despite what some people think about me, I don't have any desire to actually abuse women, and hate men who do. I like masochistic women, I like it when they enjoy it, if they don't enjoy it, the fun is gone for me.
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I can understand that. I find it true that 100% of all non-nice women want non-nice guys. And the same is true for the opposite. Nice women prefer nice guys 100% of the time.
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Have you ever tried to fly an airplane?
Do you like candy corn?
What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?
Do you like candy corn?
What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?
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Have I ever tried to fly an airplane? No. Considering the fact that I am afraid to fly in a plane as a passenger, the likely hood of taking the time to fly a plane myself is highly unlikely.
Do I like candy corn? Honestly I haven't had candy corn since 5th grade. From what I can remember I liked it, although the candy became nasty fairly quickly. It's one of those things you can only eat in small amounts.
What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow? I have no idea, lol. Science was never my strong subject.
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I wouldn't say that is true at all. There are many nice women who unfortunately fall for bad men. While I can understand how it's frustrating for men who treat women decently, it doesn't make her a bad person. She just needs a little therapy and compassion. Really though, at some point masochism does become a mental illness.
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