Thesaurus are available online for quick searches, the Hebrew word SHAKAB is actually used 213 times in the OT; 106 to mean lie (including sex) , 48 to mean sleep (including sex), 43 lie down(including sex), 3 rest, 2 lien, and 10 misc. Looked at every occurrence and would have to say most refer to sleeping or resting (even in death), not sex.
Where it was referring to sex, found only 7 times were the sexual connotation was rape. In each and every case either context or other words clearly indicating force are included in the same verse, removing any doubt that the reference is to rape.
We might count 7 more occurrences found in 3 verses, if one counts what Lots daughters did to him as rape. We could say it was not consensual in that they got him drunk and then seduced him. Am not sure most of us would agree that carries the same connotation as rape, especially when the victim is male though perhaps it is a technicality. IOW they got him drunk and had sex with him as opposed to raping him. But ok, a technicality and an offense against their father and clearly non-consent.
But even at 14 out of 213, and clearly with context and other words indicating force present when it is meant to be understood as rape, we are hard pressed to say this word always means rape when used to indicate sexual relations.
But of those 213 times, only 16 of them actually refer to sex. It is not common to use "
shakav" to refer to sex. "
Mishkav," which also mainly means "to lie down" or (as a noun) "bed," is the more common word to use when sex is meant. While 14 out of 213 looks to be inconclusive, when you look at 14 out of 16, where the two that are not clearly non-consentual are the very verses we are wondering about, suddenly the picture changes.
The
only two verses where "
shakav" means sex, and it is not clearly a case of non-consensual sex, are Leviticus 18:22 and Leviticus 20:13. In both of these verses, both "
shakav" and "
mishkav" are used. The forbidden sex is called "
shakav" while the acceptable sex it deviates from is called "
mishkav."
When the rabbis whose discussions make up the commentaries known as the Talmud and the Midrash were working out their understandings of the Scriptures, the familiar division of the books into numbered chapters and verses had not yet been invented. One rabbi would write out the whole verse to begin his argument. Another rabbi, commenting on the first one's points would abreviate the verse, quoting just enough to remind his readers of the passage in question. A discussion of Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13 would be referred to as "man-lying" or "
Mishkav zakur." Except that that is not a correct abbreviation of the verse. But it was only by pretending that the verse used "
mishkav" instead of "
shakav" that the rabbis were able to extend the prohibition to all man-on-man sex.
Even so, they could not extend it to woman-on-woman sex. A couple of rabbis questioned whether it should be, but the overwhelming response was that there was nothing wrong with a woman "rubbing" another woman.
Furthermore in the commandments referenced were Mr. Wolf wishes to see the command as forbidding rape, there is even a distinction made in other verses indicating when force is used with SHAKAB the woman is not always punished. If SHAKAB was meant to be understood as rape or non-consensual sex, it is difficult to explain why they would need another verse to forbid forced non-consensual sex.
The rabbis also wondered why, if only the taking of the "active" position is forbidden, the "passive" man is also to be killed. They could not find a satisfying answer. They were left with competing theories, none of them conclusive. The one with the most adherents was that that if the "passive" man were not killed, he would be a constant reminder of the shame that one of their own had been a "man-lyer."
This is supported by two other Biblical facts. The rape laws mandated that the woman be killed if the act occurred in the village (presumably with a neighbor), but not if it occurred in the field (presumably by a stranger) [Deuteronomy 22:23-27] and the fact that David's ambassadors to Ammon were not killed after their rape by Hanun's men, but just secluded until the evidences of their violation faded and their beards grew back in. [2 Samuel 10; 1 Chronicles 19]