I hold to my position on those verses. Yes my wife is a christian.
Advice? Sometimes the Christian-non Christian issue gets out of proportion in two ways. You can so want the spiritual component of your marriage that you can overlook the many other very worthwhile characteristics of your spouse. Also, there are Christian marriages that lack closeness and spiritual intimacy. Marriage is a complex issue with many aspects to consider and just being a Christian does not mean that you will have a great marriage. In fact the divorce rate amongst Christians is around that of non Christians these days. Then there are many Christian families with children far away from God.
Paul's advice was 1 Cor 7:17-24
17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. 18 Was a man already circumcised when he was called? He should not become uncircumcised. Was a man uncircumcised when he was called? He should not be circumcised. 19 Circumcision is nothing and uncircumcision is nothing. Keeping God's commands is what counts. 20 Each one should remain in the situation which he was in when God called him. 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. 24 Brothers, each man, as responsible to God, should remain in the situation God called him to.
We are to find God where we are. I am sure slaves were not that happy with their lot, but they had no choice about that. Find the reality of God in your circumstances. He is the true source of our deepest joys and satisfactions.
John
NZ
The name of this forum doesn't matter a whit. It doesn't even matter if the verses in 2 Corinthians 6:14+ refer to marriage or not. People come to this forum and ask for our advice about marrying an unbeliever
based on our life experiences, not based on our interpretation of 2 Corinthians 6:14.
You continually posting here that it's not a big deal to marry an unbeliever, and that we can find God in our life experiences, is like me posting in the Alcohol Abuse forum that according to the Bible it's okay to have a drink everyday, regardless of the possible repercussions... and that one can find joy in God even if one has bad experiences with alcohol, and gets trapped (or a family member gets trapped) in the grips of alcoholism. Such is true, but far better to avoid such a life if possible.
One can also find God in the depths of drug use, extreme poverty, repressive governments, debilitating physical injuries, etc., but if one avoids those issues, God can still be their source of joy under better circumstances.
For you to continually say it's fine to marry an unbeliever makes a mockery of the unique difficulties we go through. Not everyone who drinks becomes a raging alcoholic, yet it's still appropriate to warn others of the danger, especially when people are considering entering that lifestyle. So it is with marrying an unbeleiver.
For you to claim Christian marriages suffer similar rates of divorce as non-Christian marriages seems to reduce the measure of happiness in marriage to whether a couple divorces or not. We both know there is much more to it than that. Actually, your mention of those statistics isn't really relevant to this forum since you didn't provide statistics of the divorce rate for marriages between Christians and non-Christians.
You also continually mention how marriages between Christians and non-Christians were common in NT times. Of course they were common: Christianity had just started. Just because something was common in NT times doesn't mean we should strive for it today. It was common not to have indoor plumbing back then also, but I don't think we should strive for a return to that.
The remarriage forum is a place for those who are in similar life circumstances to receive support and share unique life experiences, even if others do not agree with their views. Dissenting views on scriptural references to remarriage are not even allowed there. This forum is similar in that we receive support from each other and share unique life experiences. I'm
not saying your views are not allowed here, but I am saying the interpretation of the unequally-yoked passage for our situation is largely or totally irrelevant.
You continually posting here that it's not such a bad thing to marry an unbeliever overlooks the extreme difficulties that can come about when there is a large and growing spiritual gap between a couple. I'm guessing you have never experienced such a gap. Even if your wife was not a Christian at some point, I'm guessing she wasn't openly hostile to the things of Christ in your life for years on end, such as not speaking to you for days after you attended church, or using God's name in vain repeatedly in front of the children, or openly living a repulsive lifestyle and flaunting it in your face. If you had lived in such difficult circumstances, I think you would have a little more compassion for those in difficult marriages with unbelievers.
I agree that not all marriages to unbelievers turn out so bad. Many or most here truly love their mates, and desperately want to have better marriages. Some come here to help others in difficult circumstances. Yet we would be negligent if we didn't warn others considering such a life of the possible circumstances.
I think you make a mockery of the difficulties many of us face having a spiritual chasm between us and our spouse. Not to mention the moment-by-moment realization that if our mates don't turn to God, they will not spend eternity in heaven. You also don't mention the ramifications such a marriage often has on children, where perhaps the father ridicules God openly and as such may drive the children away from God... or where the father refuses to allow the family to attend church. Yet a person married to one such as this is still bound to stay in the marriage based on 1 Corinthians 7:12-13... and that passage leaves no ambiguity.
I still respect the vast majority of your opinions, John. But I do not see where you are being edifying or helpful by continually posting here about your interpretation of 2 Corinthians 6:14. Your opinion and my opinion of the unequally-yoked verses do nothing to help those in difficult marriages due to the wide spiritual gap that comes with being married to an unbeliever.
I will agree with you that at times focusing on the spiritual gap and the fact that if our loved one dies, they won't go to heaven, can take away some of the happiness in marriage. That's reasonable. I will agree with you that at times we can still enjoy our lives with our mates and find joy in God in our circumstances. But I think you overlook or are unaware of how being married to an unbeliever can affect one's daily life and the lives of our children. Yes, we can find our joy in God in difficult times... so can the wife of a raging alcoholic, a paraplegic who was injured taking part in dangerous activity, one living in extreme poverty, etc. But far better, IMO, for the person to find joy in God and not have to live under those conditions for perhaps the rest of their life.
I realize for some, the only way they turned to God was by being in difficult living circumstances. I understand that. Yet I will still warn those considering such lifestyles of the possible consequences of their choices, whether it be the consequences of choosing to drink, engaging in dangerous activities, not valuing school, etc. And the same with marrying an unbeliever: for me to not warn others would make me negligent and possibly culpable.
Sometimes we live in a battle zone every day. Based on your posts here, I don't think you fully grasp the magnitude of what we go through at times. I truly hope you will offer us more from your life experiences and study of the Bible than just your interpretation of the unequally-yoked passage.
I am married to an unbeliever...I am well aware of the verse "be ye not unequally yoked...". Truth be told I've often felt like I was unequally yoked when hooked up with believers (those within my circle of know-how)...in fact, I don't feel unequally yoked with my unbelieving husband though I sincerely pray for his salvation for I believe, with all my heart, that Jesus is the truth, the way and the life...we have difference of opinions...we respect each other's different beliefs and have a loving relationship...I am very fortunate to have such a loving and caring husband...I love him dearly...I have felt guilty about doing this but at the same time I felt like God was telling me He meant us to be...doubt anyone else will agree with that...The verses that I kept getting were 1 Peter 3: 1-4, "Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." The verse spoke to my heart and I don't regret marrying my husband...This is my experience...
