I want to change my Muslim name

[Windir]

I posted this in the forum for new Christians but I figured you orthodox folks might understand me better, especially if there are any Greeks in here.

So I am a fairly new non-baptized Christian (by faith) and I have a deep urge to change my name to a Christian one. My current first name is Turkish (Arabic derived) while my last name is Turkish. My father is Turkish but I don't feel Turkish since I'm not born there, and because we have Greek roots and I have a Christian conviction. Therefore I'm constantly conflicted about my name, which I don't feel represents me. I also have an Arabic middle name (from my grandfather) as well as a Christian middle name from my Swedish-Finnish maternal side. But at the same time I also feel guilty for having these thoughts and I'm not sure God likes it. I did even change my surname but my father got hurt so I took it back and we haven't spoken since. This is why I feel guilty. I don't feel my motivations are good.. I am trying to connect to my Hellenic roots and 'assimilate' as a Christian but I am dishonoring my father. It is against God and it is below me. A name is just a name you could say, but in my case it's not just a name. I have experienced that a name is much more than just a name. It is something deeper, and only God knows our true name as it is said.

Should I stop obsessing over my name, or do I have a 'right' to change it? I know it is common practice in the orthodox tradition. I have to be honest, I don't want a Muslim name, and I am rejecting it. But I feel I am doing it out of pride, which makes it sinful. I am aware that the Turks might have coerced my ancestors to Islam, but I don't want to be inimical against any religion. I should be wiser and not care so much about my name, but it has become a compulsion.

Do you understand? I'm divided against myself. I am beginning to think that I have chosen Christianity out of all the wrong reasons and bad motivations which makes me reconsider my faith. I might repent and become unaffiliated again. Some of us do not live in a black and white world, but are stuck in the middle. God is bigger than religion.

 

[ArmyMatt]

I think, especially legally, you can keep the name you were given. I know many Orthodox who use their baptismal names when in Church, but the names they were given in their day-to-day.

 

[Not David]

I posted this in the forum for new Christians but I figured you orthodox folks might understand me better, especially if there are any Greeks in here.

So I am a fairly new non-baptized Christian (by faith) and I have a deep urge to change my name to a Christian one. My current first name is Turkish (Arabic derived) while my last name is Turkish. My father is Turkish but I don't feel Turkish since I'm not born there, and because we have Greek roots and I have a Christian conviction. Therefore I'm constantly conflicted about my name, which I don't feel represents me. I also have an Arabic middle name (from my grandfather) as well as a Christian middle name from my Swedish-Finnish maternal side. But at the same time I also feel guilty for having these thoughts and I'm not sure God likes it. I did even change my surname but my father got hurt so I took it back and we haven't spoken since. This is why I feel guilty. I don't feel my motivations are good.. I am trying to connect to my Hellenic roots and 'assimilate' as a Christian but I am dishonoring my father. It is against God and it is below me. A name is just a name you could say, but in my case it's not just a name. I have experienced that a name is much more than just a name. It is something deeper, and only God knows our true name as it is said.

Should I stop obsessing over my name, or do I have a 'right' to change it? I know it is common practice in the orthodox tradition. I have to be honest, I don't want a Muslim name, and I am rejecting it. But I feel I am doing it out of pride, which makes it sinful. I am aware that the Turks might have coerced my ancestors to Islam, but I don't want to be inimical against any religion. I should be wiser and not care so much about my name, but it has become a compulsion.

Do you understand? I'm divided against myself. I am beginning to think that I have chosen Christianity out of all the wrong reasons and bad motivations which makes me reconsider my faith. I might repent and become unaffiliated again. Some of us do not live in a black and white world, but are stuck in the middle. God is bigger than religion.

Have you taled to your priest about that?

 

[Windir]

Have you taled to your priest about that?

No it is too awkward. Some days I am happy about my name and others I want to change it but then feel guilty for it. So I have these identity issues that are not easy to speak about. My more mature self tells me I am making too much of a big deal out of it. That's why I'm consulting you.

 

[Not David]

No it is too awkward. Some days I am happy about my name and others I want to change it but then feel guilty for it. So I have these identity issues that are not easy to speak about. My more mature self tells me I am making too much of a big deal out of it. That's why I'm consulting you.

Well, if you feel unsure, don't change it legally. You can use your Christian name at Church like Fr. Matt said.

 

[buzuxi02]

When you are baptised you choose a new name of a saint. This becomes your new heavenly name.

My great great grandfather on my maternal side was Turkish who changed both his first and last name to a Greco-christian name when he converted to Orthodoxy in the late 1800's.

 

[xoxo]

I can relate, Windir.
I too have struggled with my birth name all of my life, but not over religious affiliation, though yes, related to culture and family. i also struggle with the very pronunciation (as have other Anglophones) of my name, as i stopped speaking the language as a child from which it is derived.
some of us carry that burden in our birth names. some don't.
I felt that if i could change my name, I could change myself, but then at some point I wanted to change that name as I was no longer satisfied! I can only tell you the conclusion I have come to - to allow my birth name to stand as a reminder of where I have come from, and in that name, is representative of my life struggle, perhaps due to burden's laid upon us from inheritance, other people's wars we must resolve and make peace within ourselves. changing a name can lead to vanity, so beware.
God Bless

 

[HowRU?]

I can understand that you are considerate of your parent’s feelings. A name is a label that we connect our identity with, however. The name/names you were given are not associated in your mind with a Christ-follower. Of course, the New Testament especially sites Greek names of outstanding followers of Jesus, and what you describe as a Muslim name takes nothing away from your value to your Heavenly Father. You very definitely have the right to change your name in this life, unless God specifically directs you not to. You would be wise to also consider that God has allowed you to be born into your family, into a Muslim situation, and then come to the saving knowledge of the Truth. I personally have slowly come to an acceptance and appreciation of my family upbringing and situation, realizing that it was God’s doing ultimately, pains and difficulties included. Perhaps your name is a strategic one for the sake of leading many Muslims to Jesus.

 

[~Anastasia~]

FWIW, there are a number of cultures where people do normally change their names when there is a major change of who they are. The new name reflects the growth or change. So to me, I understand a reason for wanting to do so?

As Fr Matt said, many people who are baptized with a new Christian name use it at Church (and sometimes in other circumstances) without necessarily legally changing it.

I use my baptismal name at Church and everyone knows me by that, because I joined a parish with a lot of older Greek immigrants and they really struggle with my call name, yet it has the same (partial) root as my baptismal name.

I also understand your family being upset, since they gave you the name. Most families are probably more "protective" of the last name and more willing to accept a new first name, if it comes to that. But since it has already caused a rift with your father, for the sake of peace it might be better to do nothing legally.

 

[xoxo]

yes, i understand very much what you are saying. it makes me reflect upon tradition. i do not share that aspect of experience with the questioner or Anastasia. very much on my own from the beginning.
it's nice to have the people we care about call us by a comfortable, or even honorable name, and vv.
we must honor our parents but we cannot live for them.
for me, dropping the issue was just one less battle to fight.
it will always be what's in the heart that matters.

 

[xoxo]

beautiful powerful words,
thank you Anastasia
wow beautiful!
there are tears in my eyes
can anyone join this tradition?
if so, i suppose a new thread is needed to stay on topic

 

[dqhall]

I posted this in the forum for new Christians but I figured you orthodox folks might understand me better, especially if there are any Greeks in here.

So I am a fairly new non-baptized Christian (by faith) and I have a deep urge to change my name to a Christian one. My current first name is Turkish (Arabic derived) while my last name is Turkish. My father is Turkish but I don't feel Turkish since I'm not born there, and because we have Greek roots and I have a Christian conviction. Therefore I'm constantly conflicted about my name, which I don't feel represents me. I also have an Arabic middle name (from my grandfather) as well as a Christian middle name from my Swedish-Finnish maternal side. But at the same time I also feel guilty for having these thoughts and I'm not sure God likes it. I did even change my surname but my father got hurt so I took it back and we haven't spoken since. This is why I feel guilty. I don't feel my motivations are good.. I am trying to connect to my Hellenic roots and 'assimilate' as a Christian but I am dishonoring my father. It is against God and it is below me. A name is just a name you could say, but in my case it's not just a name. I have experienced that a name is much more than just a name. It is something deeper, and only God knows our true name as it is said.

Should I stop obsessing over my name, or do I have a 'right' to change it? I know it is common practice in the orthodox tradition. I have to be honest, I don't want a Muslim name, and I am rejecting it. But I feel I am doing it out of pride, which makes it sinful. I am aware that the Turks might have coerced my ancestors to Islam, but I don't want to be inimical against any religion. I should be wiser and not care so much about my name, but it has become a compulsion.

Do you understand? I'm divided against myself. I am beginning to think that I have chosen Christianity out of all the wrong reasons and bad motivations which makes me reconsider my faith. I might repent and become unaffiliated again. Some of us do not live in a black and white world, but are stuck in the middle. God is bigger than religion.

If you do not have a criminal record, you should be able to get a lawyer to petition the court for a legal name change. You then must inform all your contacts of your name change. You will need new ID. It does not get you out of paying debts, if you have any.

Women routinely changed their last names after marrying.

 

[Anhelyna]

If you do not have a criminal record, you should be able to get a lawyer to petition the court for a legal name change. You then must inform all your contacts of your name change. You will need new ID. It does not get you out of paying debts, if you have any.

Women routinely changed their last names after marrying.

Please be aware that the original poster does not live in the USA. Different countries have different methods of dealing with this.

 

[dqhall]

Please be aware that the original poster does not live in the USA. Different countries have different methods of dealing with this.

This is true. The advice to use a lawyer remains in place.

 

[~Anastasia~]

beautiful powerful words,
thank you Anastasia
wow beautiful!
there are tears in my eyes
can anyone join this tradition?
if so, i suppose a new thread is needed to stay on topic

I'm thankful if it could help.

As far as Tradition, I am Eastern Orthodox. And yes, anyone can join (though you must believe in the faith and there are usually steps to the process, since it is an important spiritual step and not something we want people to commit to casually.)

I'm not sure what's available near you - I think there are some Churches there? A lot of the preparation can be done through email or over the phone, if there is no priest near enough to meet with you.

 

[~Anastasia~]

Please be aware that the original poster does not live in the USA. Different countries have different methods of dealing with this.

Even different states. I learned that technically you can change your name in California just by using the new one exclusively, but it's still easier to go the regular court-based route to get official documents.

Then again I learned of several strange laws concerning names and privacy in California.

 

[~Anastasia~]

beautiful powerful words,
thank you Anastasia
wow beautiful!
there are tears in my eyes
can anyone join this tradition?
if so, i suppose a new thread is needed to stay on topic

Oh and I forgot to add - welcome to CF!!!

 

[Phronema]

You have a bit of a difficult situation going on there, and I entirely understand what you mean. On one hand we don't want to offend our Father, or family, and on the other we want to use our Christian name because that's what you affirm. If it were me I would keep your name(s) the same legally, and use your Christian name in church only. This way you are honoring your Father, and family but are still able to use your Christian name some.

Also from my perspective it certainly doesn't look to me that you've become Christian for a wrong reason. You said you feel that you have a Christian conviction, and in my opinion that's a good reason for wanting to become Christian.

 

[Windir]

When you are baptised you choose a new name of a saint. This becomes your new heavenly name.

My great great grandfather on my maternal side was Turkish who changed both his first and last name to a Greco-christian name when he converted to Orthodoxy in the late 1800's.

That was before the Turkish nation-state was created, so religious identity came before national identity. That is essentially where I stand too, I'm not a great fan of state ideologies, but my name probably comes from ottoman times, so perhaps I should just accept it as an 'empirical' fact of historical circumstances.

Please be aware that the original poster does not live in the USA. Different countries have different methods of dealing with this.

I did change my name once, but changed it back because I felt bad about it.

You have a bit of a difficult situation going on there, and I entirely understand what you mean. On one hand we don't want to offend our Father, or family, and on the other we want to use our Christian name because that's what you affirm. If it were me I would keep your name(s) the same legally, and use your Christian name in church only. This way you are honoring your Father, and family but are still able to use your Christian name some.

What does it mean, to use a different name in church? How do you go about with that? It sounds weird to me.

from my perspective it certainly doesn't look to me that you've become Christian for a wrong reason. You said you feel that you have a Christian conviction, and in my opinion that's a good reason for wanting to become Christian.

I do have a Christian conviction yes, but it's more like I support religion in general before atheism. So it's not Christianity OR any other religion, it is Christianity AND other religions.. Yes, I do believe that Jesus rose from the dead objectively speaking, but that there are different valid paths for different people. I'm not sure my inner faith in Christ must correspond with an outer Christian identity. A part of me wants that, but another shuns it. So I'm essentially conflicted about myself. A walking paradox.

 

[AMM]

What does it mean, to use a different name in church? How do you go about with that? It sounds weird to me.

It felt weird to me at first - to the point that I avoided doing it for quite a while even though I wanted to. When you become Orthodox, you choose a Patron Saint. Their name becomes your name in the Church. From that point on, when the sacraments are given to you, your name is announced as your patron saint’s name (example: “the servant of God, Jerome, partakes of the precious body and blood of Christ”).

It felt weird at first, but actually I got quite used to it within just a couple weeks.