I tested a rich Christian

timewerx

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It's easy to say money doesn't matter when you have lots of it

As they say, talk is cheap.

When someone says trash doesn't matter to them and the garbageman takes their trash and they don't even notice, they just don't care. You know they're telling what's truly in their heart.

But if someone says money doesn't matter to them then you ask them to give you money. Suddenly they make tons of excuses not to give anything away of the "thing" they say don't matter to them.

I'm a student of "human nature" so I know what goes on in our hearts. And I also know what the Bible says. The relationship between God and money is between love and hate like between good and evil. No middle ground that we who claim to be Christians shouldn't like money at all.

And the truth is, getting a bit of money still excites me. Probably because I don't make enough. We're drowning in debt, my income isn't enough to pay for my debt inheritance (from parents) that we're soon going to be homeless.

I pray to God to give me a job with more income. Probably not the right prayer to pray. I've done this prayer for years. I've talked about this problem before with other Christians (relatives, friends in real life) but they tell me I don't have faith, it's my fault. Some even started avoiding me even though I never asked them for any help.

I maybe making the wrong prayer but strangely enough, God made His presence in my life quite abundantly. He or the Holy Spirit provided comfort in my dreams when I sleep. It's paradise each night like the movie Night at the Museum where the dead come to life, literally.

And despite the unbelievable stress I'm facing, I'm not physically aging at all. I'm in my 40's now and still looked like I did in my twenties, even better.
 
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Diamond7

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We think our success is entirely our doing but was it your choice to be born with good genes? Or born to responsible parents who did not take drugs, did not smoke while pregnant and made sure you're getting the right nutrition and education? Or even born to a nice and peaceful country, not ruled by unbridled greed and drug lords?
Lack and abundance are both a problem. We should not ask for too much or too little. I know a lot of people that come here from a third world nation and it does take a while for them to adjust to having enough to eat. In some ways the poor are better off than the rich. I would rather associate with the poor than the rich.
 
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bèlla

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In most cases less is best. The Internet is a mixed bag and you never know who you're dealing with. While it's common to share interests discrimination is needed. Material things are usually laden with suppositions and few questions. They invite scrutiny, ire, admiration and envy. He would save himself a lot of headaches by saying less.

I used to post in the prepping forum and shared my projects. We encouraged one another's growth and resourcefulness during the pandemic. Sometimes an image or two was included. But the Lord made me stop because I had too much. Not in respect to volume but expense. I anticipated price increases and shortages were a concern. We were racing against the clock to minimize the wait.

While I was in the company of kindred spirits they weren't the lone ones reading. I joined a homesteading forum later on that was private. Sharing was liberal followed with oohs and ahhs. They had a similar spirit. When I posted images from my pantry their reaction gave me pause. It wasn't bad or mean spirited. They loved it.

But I saw the difference. What I overlooked before was right in my face. It was too stylish. A labor of love in cabinets with lots of glass and the requisite white. I did the whole house during the pandemic. There's nothing wrong with redecorating but the result was stunning and made me uncomfortable.

I got lots of compliments and knew comparisons would follow or discomfort because someone lacked the same. And I took them down. It wasn't the right setting. If I was conversing with fellow designers or aficionados it's okay. They make similar investments in their environment. I won't stick out. But in that environment I did.

It's important to take the temperature and gauge the audience beforehand. I could share some things but not others. Most homesteaders aren't living like YouTubers doing the same. That's who I resembled and didn't realize how it looked. Once I was with others doing the same it became apparent.

Conscientiousness goes a long way. Meeting others where they are may require us to dial it down for the sake of grace. I don't always get it right. Sometimes I forget, I'm in a zone or oblivious to the impact I have on others. It isn't intentional and I'm getting better.

I have mixed feelings about your op. I've seen lots of theatrics over the years and been subject to attack more than once. If I shared your concerns with someone I was acquainted with but never met we'd address it privately. Not with the goal of calling him out but seeking clarity according to his comfort and spiritual leading. You're fortunate it didn't go sideways.

When we're engaging in this realm it's important to remember we're seeing one another in process. We don't know their beginning or what it took to do this or that until they tell us. They don't wear their struggles, setbacks and disappointments. Everyone has them. We keep forgetting this.

On a related note, it appears my penchant for beauty is trending. I'm not alone!


~bella
 
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friend of

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And despite the unbelievable stress I'm facing, I'm not physically aging at all. I'm in my 40's now and still looked like I did in my twenties, even better
Maybe instead of blessing you financially God blessed you physically.

I'm kind of the same. Look younger than my age (I'm 32). It's pleasant I suppose
 
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timewerx

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Maybe instead of blessing you financially God blessed you physically.

I'm kind of the same. Look younger than my age (I'm 32). It's pleasant I suppose

Not all is well however. I'm getting sharp chest pains that have gotten worse. I read that chronic stress have strong chance it will cause problems with the heart. But I'm not worried at all, if it's time for me to go then it's time and I can finally have rest from this difficult life.
 
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timewerx

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In most cases less is best. The Internet is a mixed bag and you never know who you're dealing with. While it's common to share interests discrimination is needed. Material things are usually laden with suppositions and few questions. They invite scrutiny, ire, admiration and envy. He would save himself a lot of headaches by saying less.

I used to post in the prepping forum and shared my projects. We encouraged one another's growth and resourcefulness during the pandemic. Sometimes an image or two was included. But the Lord made me stop because I had too much. Not in respect to volume but expense. I anticipated price increases and shortages were a concern. We were racing against the clock to minimize the wait.

While I was in the company of kindred spirits they weren't the lone ones reading. I joined a homesteading forum later on that was private. Sharing was liberal followed with oohs and ahhs. They had a similar spirit. When I posted images from my pantry their reaction gave me pause. It wasn't bad or mean spirited. They loved it.

But I saw the difference. What I overlooked before was right in my face. It was too stylish. A labor of love in cabinets with lots of glass and the requisite white. I did the whole house during the pandemic. There's nothing wrong with redecorating but the result was stunning and made me uncomfortable.

I got lots of compliments and knew comparisons would follow or discomfort because someone lacked the same. And I took them down. It wasn't the right setting. If I was conversing with fellow designers or aficionados it's okay. They make similar investments in their environment. I won't stick out. But in that environment I did.

It's important to take the temperature and gauge the audience beforehand. I could share some things but not others. Most homesteaders aren't living like YouTubers doing the same. That's who I resembled and didn't realize how it looked. Once I was with others doing the same it became apparent.

Conscientiousness goes a long way. Meeting others where they are may require us to dial it down for the sake of grace. I don't always get it right. Sometimes I forget, I'm in a zone or oblivious to the impact I have on others. It isn't intentional and I'm getting better.

I have mixed feelings about your op. I've seen lots of theatrics over the years and been subject to attack more than once. If I shared your concerns with someone I was acquainted with but never met we'd address it privately. Not with the goal of calling him out but seeking clarity according to his comfort and spiritual leading. You're fortunate it didn't go sideways.

When we're engaging in this realm it's important to remember we're seeing one another in process. We don't know their beginning or what it took to do this or that until they tell us. They don't wear their struggles, setbacks and disappointments. Everyone has them. We keep forgetting this.

On a related note, it appears my penchant for beauty is trending. I'm not alone!


~bella

I have rich relatives who have the same 'awakening' and became sensitive to the feelings of other people. They became a lot more careful in the stuff they upload in social networks to avoid making their less fortunate friends/relatives feel terrible about themselves. Often, they don't post at all if they have nothing 'humble' to post about.

Before, they would post about their exotic travels, the mouth-watering dishes they've made.....It's one reason why I stopped going online in social networking sites. Because here I am, trying to stretch my food supplies to survive the month and it gets a lot harder trying to suppress hunger, seeing all the incredibly good tasting foods other people are eating. I even have ad blockers so I don't see food ads. I was tempted to block their feeds but worried, they might get notification so I simply stopped visiting social networking sites altogether. Eventually, they grew some feelings and stopped posting on their own.

Perhaps they noticed I no longer went online. I never talked to them about this but there's a good reason why they would easily notice I'm no longer getting online. The last time I talked to them, they said, they felt 'convicted' it didn't feel right anymore when they used to post on their feed of all the good things they're getting when some of their friends are enduring poverty and many hardships.

Many Christians actually believed that we tell others of stories of how God blessed them but I don't feel right about this practice because even Jesus said, it isn't the way He wanted to have followers. Jesus want followers who will be attracted to the Gospel for what it is, not because they got healed or something or a dream job came out of nowhere. Even Jesus talked about it in a bad way and eventually managed to offend the majority of the crowd, leaving only a handful behind.

And true enough, Christian testimonies can leave others heart-broken and only drives people away. Christians shouldn't be driving the poor away and only trying to attract the rich and others who are doing well in life. That's the opposite of Christ's ministry
 
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bèlla

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I have rich relatives who have the same 'awakening' and became sensitive to the feelings of other people. They became a lot more careful in the stuff they upload in social networks to avoid making their less fortunate friends/relatives feel terrible about themselves. Often, they don't post at all if they have nothing 'humble' to post about.

Ideally the conversation should fit the setting. If most of their followers aren't able to do the same it's best to share it with a different audience for courtesy's sake. You don't want to give the impression you're flaunting it or stoking insecurity. Since you're related it goes without saying.

In my case it was an honest mistake. I'm usually on top of it. But I was new to the community and forgot. Nevertheless, I'm aware that homes are a hot button topic in this realm. Triggers are plentiful. Heading off the possibility was best.

Before, they would post about their exotic travels, the mouth-watering dishes they've made.....It's one reason why I stopped going online in social networking sites. Because here I am, trying to stretch my food supplies to survive the month and it gets a lot harder trying to suppress hunger, seeing all the incredibly good tasting foods other people are eating. I even have ad blockers so I don't see food ads. I was tempted to block their feeds but worried, they might get notification so I simply stopped visiting social networking sites altogether. Eventually, they grew some feelings and stopped posting on their own.

I'm sorry to hear that. My grandmother used to say she had too much family to give all her money to charity. They believed in reaching down. When one has more and the majority don't it creates scenarios like the one you described. That's why I believe in teaching a man to fish. Show him how care for himself so he can stand on his own. Most people aren't like my grandparents. They may help their kids or siblings but that's it.

Your situation requires a different approach. You need to sell. The wage won't cover it. You'd be better off making a $5 or $10 product and selling it. If you're getting 20 hours that's 10 transactions. You could do more than that in 7 days.

Sell what you know. You're passionate about inequality. Teach Christians how to be more charitable. Give them the principle + action steps in a workbook and send it out. Package your theories into quick wins and flesh them out as you grow. The job could end abruptly. Put something in place to cover yourself.

Many Christians actually believed that we tell others of stories of how God blessed them but I don't feel right about this practice because even

I don't downplay what God has done. He's brought me a long way. Our heart's are His domain. Only He can read them. I'll admit the truth and leave the rest to Him. Because it's a double-edged sword. It will grow increasingly tempting to deny Him as things worsen. If one person is bettered or strengthened it wasn't for naught.

And true enough, Christian testimonies can leave others heart-broken and only drives people away. Christians shouldn't be driving the poor away and only trying to attract the rich and others who are doing well in life. That's the opposite of Christ's ministry

That's a heart problem not an issue with His goodness. There's people who are angry with God because they're single, don't have the life they want, didn't get the promotion and so on. The common denominator is they're mad at Him. You're the scapegoat. They can't get in His face so they take it out on you.

We're instructed to rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. Not either or and it's not contingent on sameness. We're subject to the mandates in that section. All of them and everyone. No one gets a pass.

Our conversation made me think about expectations. I never expected much from anyone. Not even as a child. If they let me down I adjusted or accepted they didn't want to come through. When I was sick I never expected help. Not even from my mother. When she did I was thankful. But it wasn't her cross. It was mine. I didn't expect my friend's support. Whatever they gave was a blessing.

I don't ask for much. I let the other decide. If they want get involved or help okay. If not alright. I'll find another way instead. I don't know why I'm like that but it helps me endure and deepens my dependency on Him. Even in my greatest times of need I usually bore them in silence. No one knew.

Sufferance is empowering. It doesn't feel good but it hones you like nothing else. You develop a dignity in the discomfort and quietude that's unmistakable. Or as Gibran said:

To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.


That's when we enter the realm Avila spoke of. We must allow the sloughing and bear it gracefully when we can. The masterpiece is forged in flame not comfort. I was never more beautiful than when He humbled me. That's when it was borne. You'll find the same.

~bella
 
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timewerx

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Your situation requires a different approach. You need to sell. The wage won't cover it. You'd be better off making a $5 or $10 product and selling it. If you're getting 20 hours that's 10 transactions. You could do more than that in 7 days.

Sell what you know. You're passionate about inequality. Teach Christians how to be more charitable. Give them the principle + action steps in a workbook and send it out. Package your theories into quick wins and flesh them out as you grow. The job could end abruptly. Put something in place to cover yourself.
~bella

I tried a few times before and failed and nearly impossible to do now in my situation. I'm not even doing well in my job now as the chronic stress isn't good for the mind.

I don't talk as much about inequality as I did before. The more I do, the harder my life gets. It's waging war against the god of this world and you'd have dug your own grave.


We're instructed to rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. Not either or and it's not contingent on sameness. We're subject to the mandates in that section. All of them and everyone. No one gets a pass.

I found it's much easier said when you're not in pain of that situation for many years.

For example, I don't mind being single. All things considered, I'm better off single at the moment given my situation, my other problems are so huge, it has literally killed my desire for a partner or even developing any romantic feelings for anyone.

That said, I have some sort of contentment being single and I really do feel joy whenever I see happy couples. I even love taking a stroll or bicycle ride across the city square during Valentines Day to see all the happy couples, the fireworks displays, and just breathe in the happy atmosphere.

However, I literally feel pain when I can see other families having fun eating or filling their grocery carts when I on the other-hand had to ration my food and deal with hunger everyday for years now.

It's different when "you're there" and have been there for years. It gets way harder to rejoice with others who are doing better. And I'm not talking about millionaires or billionaires, just talking about average Joe's who are doing better.

But don't think I have given up hope. I'm still hoping for a rescue from the Lord but I think I may not get it in this world. Today I woke up with a very sharp and severe chest pain in the heart region and the back that lasted for few minutes and as a matter of fact, I'm rejoicing! It thought 'this is it!' and then oh no,! I'm ok again!:doh:Just to tell now, when you feel your time has come, usually people don't come back to tell what if felt like. It feels like being surrounded by love and the pain becomes a good feeling. It's like becoming a child again and sitting right next to your crush. It's that crazy good feeling. I'm a bit disappointed it was cut short but it made my day, made my day a bit brighter.
 
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timewerx

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Lack and abundance are both a problem. We should not ask for too much or too little. I know a lot of people that come here from a third world nation and it does take a while for them to adjust to having enough to eat. In some ways the poor are better off than the rich. I would rather associate with the poor than the rich.

If I try to look at the positives of not eating 'enough' calories, here's one I can think of. Everybody's going nuts at climate change.

While it seems like the colder parts of the world is getting colder and the hotter parts is getting hotter like the rich getting richer and the poor getting poorer.

In my corner of the world, hot seasons are getting longer. But because I've lost a lot of weight from not eating enough calories to meet my calorie demand, I now feel comfortable even at temperatures >90F with high levels of humidity. I used to suffer at those temperatures but not anymore.

It saves a bit of money not having to use A/C or even electric fan at those temperatures.

So I don't know. Becoming energy efficient physically and in living could be a good thing in the context of climate change. If I wasn't dealing with chronic stress, I'd be feeling great otherwise. I can cope with hunger with ease as long as I don't see food ads and I don't smell the neighbors cooking.
 
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bèlla

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I tried a few times before and failed and nearly impossible to do now in my situation. I'm not even doing well in my job now as the chronic stress isn't good for the mind.

I don't talk as much about inequality as I did before. The more I do, the harder my life gets. It's waging war against the god of this world and you'd have dug your own grave.

That isn't surprising given the stress. Let me pray and see what He says. I fast on Saturdays and will intercede about your health and finances. Sometimes we need others hammering on our behalf. I pray offensively for the most part for warfare. If there's pushback I'll know immediately.

If you're getting darts that's usually because you're taking ground, a spiritual threat or they want to silence you. Sometimes the arrows are bothersome but relief always comes. Spiritually speaking, we're in Nisan and here's the focus:

Meaning: To move or to start, miracles
Blessing: Redemption and freedom
Area of Healing: Enslavement
Action Needed: Declare yourself free from ______, and move or start toward your promised land
Warfare: Declare blessings over your negative situation


In other words, the climate is more conducive for breakthroughs in those areas.

I found it's much easier said when you're not in pain of that situation for many years.

For example, I don't mind being single. All things considered, I'm better off single at the moment given my situation, my other problems are so huge, it has literally killed my desire for a partner or even developing any romantic feelings for anyone.

We all have places where struggle is difficult and others we endure with ease. Singleness isn't your nemesis but its burdensome for some. Financial constraints are hard. You've been on the other side. Whereas someone who suffered lack more routinely might have less discomfort.

However, I literally feel pain when I can see other families having fun eating or filling their grocery carts when I on the other-hand had to ration my food and deal with hunger everyday for years now.

That's why me rearing its head. Understandably. I direct my mind elsewhere and focus on something nourishing that lifts my spirits. Christmas and New Years Eve used to make me sad. Now I have no connection to either. I'm certain many would love to have your peace in their singleness. For them it's a miserable state.

It's different when "you're there" and have been there for years. It gets way harder to rejoice with others who are doing better. And I'm not talking about millionaires or billionaires, just talking about average Joe's who are doing better.

I was sick for a long time and very young. What most would call my prime (22). I couldn't even walk to the cafeteria. It became too laborious. My co-worker had to bring my meals each day. She'd make two trips to get our trays and she was older. My neighbor would feed my daughter and put on a pot of tea while we watched a British sitcom. I found joy in the little things.

But don't think I have given up hope. I'm still hoping for a rescue from the Lord but I think I may not get it in this world. Today I woke up with a very sharp and severe chest pain in the heart region and the back that lasted for few minutes and as a matter of fact, I'm rejoicing! It thought 'this is it!' and then oh no,! I'm ok again!:doh:Just to tell now, when you feel your time has come, usually people don't come back to tell what if felt like. It feels like being surrounded by love and the pain becomes a good feeling. It's like becoming a child again and sitting right next to your crush. It's that crazy good feeling. I'm a bit disappointed it was cut short but it made my day, made my day a bit brighter.

I don't know. I can't read His mind. But I'm not sure you've finished your mission. The dark night is grievous but the victory is great. The bigger it is the deeper the hurt. I remember when my grandfather was in the hospital. I knew he wouldn't return. The last rights were given and I saw him leave. But he was still alive in the natural.

But the man I saw was radiant. He got out of bed and looked at me and said I'm okay. He was thin and younger with dark hair. The way he looked when I was a child. He told me twice more I'm okay. As he drew his last breaths we prayed him out hand in hand.

Psalm 1 as the tears rolled down our face. And his grave is stationed by a tree near a small pond. The last thing he heard was 2 Timothy 4:7-8. Could you imagine going Home on that note? That became the text for the eulogy. The Lord honored him. I hope I have the same.

~bella
 
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timewerx

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That isn't surprising given the stress. Let me pray and see what He says. I fast on Saturdays and will intercede about your health and finances. Sometimes we need others hammering on our behalf. I pray offensively for the most part for warfare. If there's pushback I'll know immediately.

If you're getting darts that's usually because you're taking ground, a spiritual threat or they want to silence you. Sometimes the arrows are bothersome but relief always comes. Spiritually speaking, we're in Nisan and here's the focus:

Meaning: To move or to start, miracles
Blessing: Redemption and freedom
Area of Healing: Enslavement
Action Needed: Declare yourself free from ______, and move or start toward your promised land
Warfare: Declare blessings over your negative situation

I really appreciate this, thank you so much! Christian relatives who knows our situation, don't really want to get involved out of fear, the "jinx" might pass on to them. Some even try to avoid us completely. These are people we helped in the past when they were in financial need.

I think people these days, Christians included have made "positive energy" their god, an idol that they would avoid anyone who might ruin their "positive energy".

That's why me rearing its head. Understandably. I direct my mind elsewhere and focus on something nourishing that lifts my spirits. Christmas and New Years Eve used to make me sad. Now I have no connection to either. I'm certain many would love to have your peace in their singleness. For them it's a miserable state.

It's really funny when my life used to be overall good. I was quite miserable being single. I don't remember the feeling anymore but I remember being quite miserable as single.

But a lot has changed with me now. If by some miracle, I recover from this nosedive. I don't think I'd be as miserable looking for romance as I did before. Before, I had extremely inflated value of romance, marriage, etc. I think this is a common problem among singles. They only see what couples do when they're out in the public, not aware of the battles tearing couples apart in the privacy of their homes. My predicament taught me the reality of things that everyone is miserable, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked (Rev 3:17) no matter what success they reach in life.

I was sick for a long time and very young. What most would call my prime (22). I couldn't even walk to the cafeteria. It became too laborious. My co-worker had to bring my meals each day. She'd make two trips to get our trays and she was older. My neighbor would feed my daughter and put on a pot of tea while we watched a British sitcom. I found joy in the little things.

That was long ago right? Sorry for missing your prime but you sound like the picture of health now according to your posts.

I don't know. I can't read His mind. But I'm not sure you've finished your mission. The dark night is grievous but the victory is great. The bigger it is the deeper the hurt. I remember when my grandfather was in the hospital. I knew he wouldn't return. The last rights were given and I saw him leave. But he was still alive in the natural.

But the man I saw was radiant. He got out of bed and looked at me and said I'm okay. He was thin and younger with dark hair. The way he looked when I was a child. He told me twice more I'm okay. As he drew his last breaths we prayed him out hand in hand.

Psalm 1 as the tears rolled down our face. And his grave is stationed by a tree near a small pond. The last thing he heard was 2 Timothy 4:7-8. Could you imagine going Home on that note? That became the text for the eulogy. The Lord honored him. I hope I have the same.

Sorry about your grandfather. Sounds like you two are very close and you miss him a lot. I had a similar experience when my dad passed away and we are quite close and I really miss him a lot.

Not sure about a mission but I had several dreams few years ago when Jesus talked to me. He told me when the time came I'm living by myself, He'll come for me and work with me. Teach me things. I can't tell if I'm dead or alive by then.

Sometimes, I'd see Jesus and dad together in the same dream. Not necessarily talking to each other or right next to each other but in the same place and time.

I'm most grateful for these dreams. They give me reason to hold on, to hope and they make me feel quite good despite all these difficult trials. Each night, I have these dreams. Though my days are totally messed up. At night when I dream, it's one adventure after another. I don't know if this is a coping mechanism because I never had dreams this good before and every night. Maybe it's the Holy Spirit?
 
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bèlla

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I really appreciate this, thank you so much! Christian relatives who knows our situation, don't really want to get involved out of fear, the "jinx" might pass on to them. Some even try to avoid us completely. These are people we helped in the past when they were in financial need.

What do they fear will happen by getting involved?

I think people these days, Christians included have made "positive energy" their god, an idol that they would avoid anyone who might ruin their "positive energy".

I don't know if positive energy's the culprit as opposed to coping mechanisms. Some people handle adversity better than others. And unlike social settings, churches are more likely to have a larger population of hurting and broken people. Western culture encourages strength and survival. You're not expected to have a perfect life. You're rewarded for weathering challenges without falling apart. Weakness is shameful.

Add in the growing severity of mental, financial and relational issues and too few to handle them. We need an army of counselors. A lot of this is beyond the layman. They can offer support and prayer but they're ill equipped to tackle problems requiring professional input. The decimation of family and neighborly connections places the onus on the church. Without the right pieces in place its overwhelming.

It's really funny when my life used to be overall good. I was quite miserable being single. I don't remember the feeling anymore but I remember being quite miserable as single.

You expected more and the absence was bothersome. There's nothing wrong with wanting to share your life with someone. But a failure to live until its fulfillment is where I draw the line. I can't control everything that happens in my life but I have a say on how I view it. I can get upset, shake my fist at God, take it out on others or stir the pot constantly and be depressed. Stinking thinking never helped anyone.

What you focus on you'll inevitably manifest because you're feeding it. At some point we must consider is it serving me? What am I getting out of it? Is the behavior beneficial or harmful? We're told to cast our cares for a reason. There's a supernatural correlation to everything. We should articulate life affirming messages (the word) over ourselves, our circumstances, relationships, dreams, and environment. Irrespective of what we see and feel in the natural. We're speaking to the heavenlies.

But a lot has changed with me now. If by some miracle, I recover from this nosedive. I don't think I'd be as miserable looking for romance as I did before. Before, I had extremely inflated value of romance, marriage, etc. I think this is a common problem among singles. They only see what couples do when they're out in the public, not aware of the battles tearing couples apart in the privacy of their homes. My predicament taught me the reality of things that everyone is miserable, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked (Rev 3:17) no matter what success they reach in life.

Most people spend all their lives running from their reflection when an offensive approach is best. They never give thought to their fashioning. They're too busy trying to be what the world says instead of studying their blueprint and questioning how God is glorified through their makeup. Everything He did or didn't provide is for a reason.

You move in your gifts in talents until you hit a wall. If you're still creating and flowing you haven't reached the mark. Keep going. There's nothing worse than unrealized potential. The majority devote their time to things He didn't anoint. The blessing is always found in the gift. It isn't the lone one we'll receive but its endowed with favor. Sometimes the manifestation is direct or an avenue to an opportunity to bring it forth.

That's why I mentioned your passion. It's programmed to flourish because it came from Him.

That was long ago right? Sorry for missing your prime but you sound like the picture of health now according to your posts.

It happened during my prime but I made the best of it. Instead of dwelling on what I lost or could no longer do I did the opposite. I fed the possibilities instead of denials and life didn't look so bleak. When all is well there's a lot we never experience. Our time and focus is elsewhere. Adversity shakes things up.

I'm fine now and challenging myself to do more. Where am I slacking, holding back, etc. Because satan never sleeps and his people are grinding. And I want to do the same.

Sorry about your grandfather. Sounds like you two are very close and you miss him a lot. I had a similar experience when my dad passed away and we are quite close and I really miss him a lot.

Thank you. I adored him and was the youngest and his sidekick. Whether he was in the garden or building something I was right beside him. I wasn't with the ladies or helping them out. He was more interesting.

I'm sorry for your loss. What do you remember best about him?

Not sure about a mission but I had several dreams few years ago when Jesus talked to me. He told me when the time came I'm living by myself, He'll come for me and work with me. Teach me things. I can't tell if I'm dead or alive by then.

Perhaps its a signpost of sorts or ray of hope you're meant to cling to. There's something beyond it. When I was sick I was forced to give up my dream of medicine. My body wouldn't comply. So I found another and God opened the door. It didn't lead me here but it was the start of something new that was reaffirmed through other experiences.

I'm most grateful for these dreams. They give me reason to hold on, to hope and they make me feel quite good despite all these difficult trials. Each night, I have these dreams. Though my days are totally messed up. At night when I dream, it's one adventure after another. I don't know if this is a coping mechanism because I never had dreams this good before and every night. Maybe it's the Holy Spirit?

He's probably comforting you. The greatest ministry occurs in the midnight hour (12-3am). There's more spiritual activity during that period than elsewhere. It's a great time to pray if you can.

The sun always rises and night doesn't last. It feels like it when we're there. But once we're on the other side we see it as He does. You're living a book as we speak. Capture the experience one day at a time.

Don't forget the lepers. They were cleansed as they went to wash. Stop contemplating if this is the end and start focusing on the message and the healing to come. Write your story. Someone needs to hear how you made it and you'll be their beacon. See how that works? ;-)

~bella
 
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timewerx

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What do they fear will happen by getting involved?

I don't know if positive energy's the culprit as opposed to coping mechanisms. Some people handle adversity better than others. And unlike social settings, churches are more likely to have a larger population of hurting and broken people. Western culture encourages strength and survival. You're not expected to have a perfect life. You're rewarded for weathering challenges without falling apart. Weakness is shameful.

They fear the our string of misfortunes will 'infect' them. They look at us like we're lepers. All our previous generations started out poor.

They are all familiar with the struggles of poverty. But some are so afraid / phobic going back to those struggles so they'll do everything to avoid anything that can potentially ruin their comfortable lives. They may even resort to superstitious beliefs. We're all Christians so the behavior is clearly idolatry of one's success / comfort.

You expected more and the absence was bothersome. There's nothing wrong with wanting to share your life with someone. But a failure to live until its fulfillment is where I draw the line. I can't control everything that happens in my life but I have a say on how I view it. I can get upset, shake my fist at God, take it out on others or stir the pot constantly and be depressed. Stinking thinking never helped anyone.

What you focus on you'll inevitably manifest because you're feeding it. At some point we must consider is it serving me? What am I getting out of it? Is the behavior beneficial or harmful? We're told to cast our cares for a reason. There's a supernatural correlation to everything. We should articulate life affirming messages (the word) over ourselves, our circumstances, relationships, dreams, and environment. Irrespective of what we see and feel in the natural. We're speaking to the heavenlies.

Yes, I used to expect more out of a relationship to the point of unrealism. Worse, I also way way overestimated my own value in a relationship. I used to think I'm incredibly smart, stable, sensitive, calm, warm and loving, and focused even in extremely stressful situations, and with good leadership qualities.

It's only now I realized I have NONE of those. And NOT for the lack of faith but simply coming to this realization. I thought I'd have enormous contribution in a relationship but it isn't true. It's all fantasy.

It gives some comfort in thinking the possibility that women will be better off with somebody else than me.

I think it's a common thinking problem with long-time single men, we think we are 'rescuing' women from bad relationships if they just become our GF or even our wives. But often times, we just think too highly of ourselves. We overestimate our value and then set high expectations out of a relationship to the point of unrealism and finally we get miserable if nothing happens for a long time.

Most people spend all their lives running from their reflection when an offensive approach is best. They never give thought to their fashioning. They're too busy trying to be what the world says instead of studying their blueprint and questioning how God is glorified through their makeup. Everything He did or didn't provide is for a reason.

You move in your gifts in talents until you hit a wall. If you're still creating and flowing you haven't reached the mark. Keep going. There's nothing worse than unrealized potential. The majority devote their time to things He didn't anoint. The blessing is always found in the gift. It isn't the lone one we'll receive but its endowed with favor. Sometimes the manifestation is direct or an avenue to an opportunity to bring it forth.

That's why I mentioned your passion. It's programmed to flourish because it came from Him.

It seems to be with spiritual warfare but the problem is because the devil could not attack me directly, it will attack other members of the family, opportunities, and also the people I work for.

I'm unable to extend this protection to them and probably because they believe in a different doctrine / theology and probably why Jesus told me in a dream, He will return for me when I'm living alone and I think this is meant by I'm no longer counting on other people and vice versa, independence, self-sufficiency, lack of worry in what the devil might do to people close to me. Doesn't necessarily mean I'd be out of financial hardships, It could also happen even when I'm homeless. The condition may even be served by my own death or in old age when all the people I care for are no longer around and I'm literally alone.

He's probably comforting you. The greatest ministry occurs in the midnight hour (12-3am). There's more spiritual activity during that period than elsewhere. It's a great time to pray if you can.

The sun always rises and night doesn't last. It feels like it when we're there. But once we're on the other side we see it as He does. You're living a book as we speak. Capture the experience one day at a time.

Don't forget the lepers. They were cleansed as they went to wash. Stop contemplating if this is the end and start focusing on the message and the healing to come. Write your story. Someone needs to hear how you made it and you'll be their beacon. See how that works? ;-)

That's good to know. I wake up every two hours when sleeping so I cover all hours of the night. I do short meditation each time I awake. Different dream each time. Unfortunately, I don't remember all the dreams. I used to write down my dreams but I stopped doing it because sometimes after I wrote it down, I couldn't get back to sleep anymore.

About half of the time, Jesus would be present in the dreams and we would play around like children but with Him using some of His supernatural abilities to make things a little more interesting. It's like being inside a video game like Jumanji. It's all casual until I wake up and realized 'what just happened?!'. I'd bet if I ask Jesus why did he do that, He'd probably reply 'because I'm fun?!'

It's always the loved ones who are no longer with us and then Jesus, and sometimes, they're all on the same dream. It didn't seem like heaven but more like an alternate reality a more fun version of our boring world right now.
 
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bèlla

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They fear the our string of misfortunes will 'infect' them. They look at us like we're lepers. All our previous generations started out poor.

They are all familiar with the struggles of poverty. But some are so afraid / phobic going back to those struggles so they'll do everything to avoid anything that can potentially ruin their comfortable lives. They may even resort to superstitious beliefs. We're all Christians so the behavior is clearly idolatry of one's success / comfort.

Multi generational problems bear exploring. When the chain is longstanding it isn't uncommon for the fear of return to impact a group's psyche. While I don't believe in jinxes per se (as bad luck) I'm aware of spiritual hindrances and alliances that can warrant undue hardship. Addressing familiar spirits, external/internal bad wishes and witchcraft, occult involvement (including pledges) and self-harm (through the tongue) is advisable.

It gives some comfort in thinking the possibility that women will be better off with somebody else than me.

If your circumstances shift you may feel differently or the Lord may lead you to marry.

It seems to be with spiritual warfare but the problem is because the devil could not attack me directly, it will attack other members of the family, opportunities, and also the people I work for.

While your affliction may have started through human error it's exacerbated by the evil one. If it solely directed towards the other the resolution would have come speedily with little to no bother on your end. You won't go unscathed because of your connection and residence. But limitations can be set.

I'm unable to extend this protection

We have no power in and of ourselves to defeat satanic entities. It's the Spirit that dwells within us, the blood shed on our behalf and the angels who stand watch whom they fear.

~bella
 
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timewerx

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Multi generational problems bear exploring. When the chain is longstanding it isn't uncommon for the fear of return to impact a group's psyche. While I don't believe in jinxes per se (as bad luck) I'm aware of spiritual hindrances and alliances that can warrant undue hardship. Addressing familiar spirits, external/internal bad wishes and witchcraft, occult involvement (including pledges) and self-harm (through the tongue) is advisable.



If your circumstances shift you may feel differently or the Lord may lead you to marry.



While your affliction may have started through human error it's exacerbated by the evil one. If it solely directed towards the other the resolution would have come speedily with little to no bother on your end. You won't go unscathed because of your connection and residence. But limitations can be set.



We have no power in and of ourselves to defeat satanic entities. It's the Spirit that dwells within us, the blood shed on our behalf and the angels who stand watch whom they fear.

~bella

We have rich relatives but they don't care. They could have helped us without spending a dime and just with their connections and influence and some effort but they don't even bother.

But the thing is, they follow a different God. They claim to be Christians. Unfortunately, even my close family members are also 'Christians' but they all follow a false god.

Perhaps why I can't extend the protection to them because the entity I'm waging war against is their god. They're chasing the one I'm trying to burn.
 
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lismore

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So I asked this rich member if he can give me one of his car that's working perfectly fine to replace my old beat up car. He says he can't.
Your post reminds me of this biblical teaching:

John answered, “Anyone who has two shirts should share with the one who has none, and anyone who has food should do the same.” (Luke 3:11)

God Bless :)
 
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timewerx

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Your post reminds me of this biblical teaching:

John answered, “Anyone who has two shirts should share with the one who has none, and anyone who has food should do the same.” (Luke 3:11)

God Bless :)

But many Christians don't this anymore. Many have nothing to give. They blame their expensive mortgages, expensive car loans, expensive lifestyle, many indulgences like in food, travel, and leisure.

Sometimes even Christians who has paid off their mortgage and practically debt-free with lots of disposable income, they still have nothing to give because of expensive indulgences like travel, expensive hobbies.

Perhaps it just proves they love their worldly stuff and their family MORE than the Lord, MORE than what the Lord wants. They love their idolatrous life.

Because if we truly love the Lord, we would essentially be denying ourselves of the evil influence of this world, settled for less, have more for God's Kingdom.

Those who are rich in this world but poor towards God will die. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be. This is what the Lord teaches. The Lord is telling us how to live and to live abundantly. But False Teachers have twisted the meaning of this into something corrupt, worldly, materialistic, and many listened to them.
 
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