I never thought this would happen....

[SeekingGloryOnThisJourney]

I don't want to admit 100% of my sins today and this morning. God knows what they are. But my wife and I finally make up after 8 years of horrible marriage. She was nice to me, she's been cleaning since we woke up this morning and has been in such a great mood and I.... I did the unspeakable. I cheated on her with a girl. No not physically but we cybered back and forth for a good almost 3 hours and to me? And to the dirty things we were talking about doing to each other in this role play situation i... fell in love. To make up for my sin I asked my wife for sex and it wasn't as magical as I thought it was going to be. Having sex with her was supposed to completely cleanse me of my sin forever. It was supposed to be magical and like i chose her and only her forever. Now I feel like something is missing. Like I permanently severed bonds between my wife and I forever. I... loved the things this girl was doing. She was role-playing affection and love. Something I haven't felt from my wife in a really long time. I tried to get it after our encounter but it wasn't the same. There's no spark in our love life anymore its like our marriage is over and I would like to go with this other girl. She's a tramp so she would have anybody but... she also made me feel loved when we were talking and when we were cybering with each other.

I... haven't felt loved in I don't know how many years. Not just in our marriage when I met my wife but for almost 25 years before. I'm tempted to continuing seeing this girl behind her back. I mean, the spark in my marriage ended years ago. I stayed because Christ told me to. But I was miserable for almost the entirety of our marriage. We ALWAYS argued, it was one huge power struggle and to finally meet a woman who has no power struggle and loves me for.... well... me. I'm sorry but I'm tempted. I need help and advice and I need prayers that God will lead me in the right direction. I know the right direction is to stay in the sparkless marriage that will only make me miserable. I just need God's helpful hand to keep it that way. Because right now? I want more than cyber sex. I want real sex and a real relationship. I'd be 50 million times happier with her than I would my wife, I just know it. Thats why its so tempting to just charge a plane ticket and say arividerchi....

Does this cyber girl know you’re married?

 

[Sketcher]

I want real sex and a real relationship. I'd be 50 million times happier with her than I would my wife, I just know it. Thats why its so tempting to just charge a plane ticket and say arividerchi....

No you wouldn't.

Just because I desire a relationship with somebody else doesn't mean its the right thing to do. But, we are free to leave each other now that I've committed adultery. So if I told her and she wants out I'm technically free.

No, you're not.

 

[Neostarwcc]

Just know you're not alone. I feel like I'm falling for a married man from our church.

Thank you, that makes me feel a lot better that I'm not alone. Adultery is just so... easy.

 

[Neostarwcc]

Does this cyber girl know you’re married?

Yes.

 

[SeekingGloryOnThisJourney]

Yes.

How do you know she isn’t doing the same thing to you to other guys?
And, God forbid, you do start a relationship with her, she would still do this with other married men?

 

[Neostarwcc]

How do you know she isn’t doing the same thing to you to other guys?
And, God forbid, you do start a relationship with her, she would still do this with other married men?

Yeah that thought occurred to me. I want to work on my marriage now. I did tell my wife about it and she forgave me so there's at least a chance at redemption. She technically was free to leave me. Thats the case either adultery when the man cheats.

 

[catch_the_music]

Fall in love with your wife again. Catch her doing good things and write those down. Pull out that list and remind yourself of her blessing on your life. Thank God for her daily in prayer. Seek out a way to recommit to your marriage. Marriage seminars are good for this. Family Life Today and Focus on the Family have good marriage seminars. My wife and I really enjoy these. We have refocused and committed to our marriage through these conferences. They encourage honest discussion about loving each other and love in the bedroom. They have lots of great resources to aid the discussions. Seek God's forgiveness for past issues and then move in the right direction to transform your marriage. God Bless!

 

[SarahsKnight]

She's a tramp so she would have anybody but... she also made me feel loved when we were talking and when we were cybering with each other.

Well, you're cheating on your wife with her so what does that make you?