I need prayer about finances and for emotional healing. But it is not as simple as just getting money for a bill.
I have these habits(strongholds, addictions) when it comes to spending. I don't gamble or do anything like that. But what I do is when I feel under stress I spend money on frivilous things. It adds up and it wrecks my budget. It keeps me always just a little behind because I catch up when I'm in the phase where I'm not spending. But then I hit a spending phase and get way behind.
I am just coming out of a spending phase. And I am wondering how I can break this pattern. I know, I'm in the phase where I'll do better till another wave hits. I want the pattern broken.
Please don't give me trite comments, because Ive probably heard them all.Ive seen G-d do miracles in my life and in other persons too. I have been for financial counseling three times at three differnet churches over the years. Ive read Larry Burkett and dozens of christian books on budgeting.
My spending habits have been there since I was a child. As long as I can remember.I use spending to deal with stress or emotional pain.
These last two years have been so much pain for me. My wife had an affair two years ago and left me. G-d has pulled me out of such a deep , deep pit of depression. I was suicidal and would be dead now if not for G-d.
The thing that set off my last spending phase was the combination of a very emotional visit with my children.Plus I had to take this class for divorced parents mandated by the courts.The class had videos of children talking about their feelings and pain from divorce. My ex-wife was there in the class and said some very hurtful things to me.
So I ordered pizza and bought a bunch of junk food like chocolate ice-cream.I also spent some money on some movies to get my mind off of it. Like I said, it just adds up. I went through this last week of spending while trying to recover emotionally from the class and the visit.I also called off sick from work two days. I don't get paid sick days.
Now I am feeling better and I am looking at trying to dig out of the hole financially yet again. I'm on a very tight budget and I really can't afford to spend and miss work.I have lots of debts and am paying child support which takes 45% of my income.
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about forgiveness. I am really praying for help on that one.
There is much more that I could say. Please pray for me about emotional healing for my hurts and for the spending patterns to be broken because that just makes an already difficult situation a lot more stressful. I'm struggling to forgive myself and to forgive my ex-wife.
I need more that just some advice, or a peptalk. I need some help from G-d Himself. Real answers.
Ben
I have these habits(strongholds, addictions) when it comes to spending. I don't gamble or do anything like that. But what I do is when I feel under stress I spend money on frivilous things. It adds up and it wrecks my budget. It keeps me always just a little behind because I catch up when I'm in the phase where I'm not spending. But then I hit a spending phase and get way behind.
I am just coming out of a spending phase. And I am wondering how I can break this pattern. I know, I'm in the phase where I'll do better till another wave hits. I want the pattern broken.
Please don't give me trite comments, because Ive probably heard them all.Ive seen G-d do miracles in my life and in other persons too. I have been for financial counseling three times at three differnet churches over the years. Ive read Larry Burkett and dozens of christian books on budgeting.
My spending habits have been there since I was a child. As long as I can remember.I use spending to deal with stress or emotional pain.
These last two years have been so much pain for me. My wife had an affair two years ago and left me. G-d has pulled me out of such a deep , deep pit of depression. I was suicidal and would be dead now if not for G-d.
The thing that set off my last spending phase was the combination of a very emotional visit with my children.Plus I had to take this class for divorced parents mandated by the courts.The class had videos of children talking about their feelings and pain from divorce. My ex-wife was there in the class and said some very hurtful things to me.
So I ordered pizza and bought a bunch of junk food like chocolate ice-cream.I also spent some money on some movies to get my mind off of it. Like I said, it just adds up. I went through this last week of spending while trying to recover emotionally from the class and the visit.I also called off sick from work two days. I don't get paid sick days.
Now I am feeling better and I am looking at trying to dig out of the hole financially yet again. I'm on a very tight budget and I really can't afford to spend and miss work.I have lots of debts and am paying child support which takes 45% of my income.
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about forgiveness. I am really praying for help on that one.
There is much more that I could say. Please pray for me about emotional healing for my hurts and for the spending patterns to be broken because that just makes an already difficult situation a lot more stressful. I'm struggling to forgive myself and to forgive my ex-wife.
I need more that just some advice, or a peptalk. I need some help from G-d Himself. Real answers.
Ben
You are such a man of God and you love him with all your heart....These people don't know you like I do, but what I have seen is a remarkable change in you....I don't see most of the destructive behaviors that were present when we met...You have grown....I too have spending problems...I believe its part of the bi-polar in me....One thing that I have been thinking about is that I think its a good Idea for us to budget the money for these spending times, if we incorporate it into the budget then it will be less devistating to our plans.....My mother is a whiz at this kind of stuff and she has told me to do this on many different occasions....Money slips through my hands quickly so your not alone..... 
In the depression....we have a great tool here and thats the course by lucinda bassett and the on-line 24 hour help if we need it....Another positive note is you can see my doctors and establish a relationship with them...I trust them completely and without hesitation.....I have been seeing my psychiatrist for many many years and with hard work he has gotten my medication stable and at the correct dose, and my primary has taken care of the other things and I thank the lord for bringing them into my life......I will support you in any decision or avenue you decided to go.....So, your not alone ben and I pray for you and the kids and us as a couple....dont give up and look to the heavens....and when in doubt of what to do....WORSHIP AND PRAY....I love you very much.......forever and always your angel 
Michelle (mama)
