i was really in search for a christian forum to find people to talk with. i'm male 23 and i'm still studying. i feel sad and lonely. i got problems that are too shallow for other people but are great burden to me. yes yes. a lot of people quote the sweet bible verse "cast your burdens upon me and i will give you rest." but i really cant get it.i dont know how it works.. well dying came across my mind several times. yes, its an option but the last one i think. feel free to insult me in any possible way for having a mindset like this. maybe it will knock some sense into my head. i really am used to people stabbing and insulting me behind my back. sometimes they mock me or shout things at me when i pass by or then they pass by me. all i want is to go in some peaceful place and live there. this place is like hell for me and its killing me slowly. i enjoy being alone most of the time. since i was a kid i have few friends. i really choose my friends. end times and end of the world makes me happy and i really wish it will be soon. this makes me go on and survive my day to day struggles. i really wish my life will change in a good way.
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i just want someone to talk with
- Thread starter hopefulman
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Welcome to the forums. I am sorry your are so lonely. When I was lonely as a teen, and felt often rejected and did not have any real friends where we lived Mom told me to keep saying Jesus is enough. I said it until I believed it. Do I think it's easy? no I don't, not at all.
I guess that could be hard but if you have a relationship with the Lord, well that's what the point we all should come to that even if we do not have a friend in the world, we have Jesus.
Feel free to share how you feel about what I said and what you are feeling.
It might be a good idea to post your post under the Christian Advice section too, I find the people who respond there are very helpful and kind.
God bless. Praying for you.
I guess that could be hard but if you have a relationship with the Lord, well that's what the point we all should come to that even if we do not have a friend in the world, we have Jesus.
Feel free to share how you feel about what I said and what you are feeling.
It might be a good idea to post your post under the Christian Advice section too, I find the people who respond there are very helpful and kind.
God bless. Praying for you.
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Welcome. To me it sounds like you are battling with some anxiety and depression brought on from your life situation, correct? And an obvious fear of death, which any honest person will tell you has crossed them at one point or another.
My honest suggestion, talk about these things with your family if you can, friends if you have deep/emotional conversations with them, and lastly pastor if need be, OR, the obvious reason you came here is to write them down to talk to us on here about. It sounds like you really need to talk to someone, and likely need some other ways to vent/relax. On ways to vent/relax I'd suggest: deep slow nasal breathing(ultimately a mediation like breath), listening to your favorite music, watching a funny tv show/movie, or doing one of your favorite things. They should all help you destress and take your mind off these issues.
And please feel free to give a further explanation of your issues/problems. Nothing is "too shallow" to talk about. We are all people and I'm sure if you've had or thought up some problem it's occurred at least to a couple people here.
My honest suggestion, talk about these things with your family if you can, friends if you have deep/emotional conversations with them, and lastly pastor if need be, OR, the obvious reason you came here is to write them down to talk to us on here about. It sounds like you really need to talk to someone, and likely need some other ways to vent/relax. On ways to vent/relax I'd suggest: deep slow nasal breathing(ultimately a mediation like breath), listening to your favorite music, watching a funny tv show/movie, or doing one of your favorite things. They should all help you destress and take your mind off these issues.
And please feel free to give a further explanation of your issues/problems. Nothing is "too shallow" to talk about. We are all people and I'm sure if you've had or thought up some problem it's occurred at least to a couple people here.
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Thank you for your reply. I really am grateful that you spared time in reading and doing a reply in my post. The situation that I am in started then I was in college. In my previous school there were rumors that I kissed a gay school staff. Which it never really happened. There was this terror professor that is spreading this rumors. I was just actually talking to this gay school staff about his birthday. I was actually greeting him! We are talking about his birthday and I was just teasing him to treat the school. I was not aware that the terror professor is looking at us with malice and that maybe from his angle of view it looks like we were kissing. Well, the next day the rumors spread like wildfire and a lot of people are giving me side comments like “a man having a relationship with a gay is actually gay.” And “why do gay people send their boyfriend to the same school they are working?” That’s where it started. Then I find myself in a situation where in no one would listen to me. I was excluded. I never had the opportunity to defend or say my part.
Then I started to plan to transfer. I was able to convince my mom to transfer me to another school even if we are poor. I’m doing well in school so my mom never thought that I’m having this kind of problem. And I really don’t want to bother my parents. They leave 9am in the morning and goes back around 8pm at night. They are working hard to earn money so I don’t want to be a burden.
When I transferred, I was only able to make a good friend. Well, i have few friends from the start. The rumors then spread again. Maybe its like a ghost trying to haunt me. Then a lot happened just like the first incident. Its me again falsely being accused of being gay. I don’t want my mom to cry again so I am enduring this. I actually do have a girlfriend and few of my friends know that. Not even my parents or siblings know that i have a girlfriend. She lives in the same town that I am in. we meet every week and even if i want to meet her everyday,i dont have the money to do it. what i'm doing is to save some money from my allowance just to have enough money for the weekend to meet her. she's a sweet girl, and i can say God is so good for making her my girlfriend. She keeps on telling me how lucky she is that I’m her boyfriend but at the back of my mind she is not that lucky. I’m a looser and that maybe I need to break our relationship. I already told her that there are rumors floating around about me. She told me that she doesn’t care about that. Well, I was happy to hear that but I cant endure if she is caught up in the situation. I mean if people will mock her the way they are mocking me. I really want to graduate and earn a few money and live somewhere else with her. I want to find a good paying job after I graduate and show my parents how grateful I am for their efforts in sending me to school.
Then I started to plan to transfer. I was able to convince my mom to transfer me to another school even if we are poor. I’m doing well in school so my mom never thought that I’m having this kind of problem. And I really don’t want to bother my parents. They leave 9am in the morning and goes back around 8pm at night. They are working hard to earn money so I don’t want to be a burden.
When I transferred, I was only able to make a good friend. Well, i have few friends from the start. The rumors then spread again. Maybe its like a ghost trying to haunt me. Then a lot happened just like the first incident. Its me again falsely being accused of being gay. I don’t want my mom to cry again so I am enduring this. I actually do have a girlfriend and few of my friends know that. Not even my parents or siblings know that i have a girlfriend. She lives in the same town that I am in. we meet every week and even if i want to meet her everyday,i dont have the money to do it. what i'm doing is to save some money from my allowance just to have enough money for the weekend to meet her. she's a sweet girl, and i can say God is so good for making her my girlfriend. She keeps on telling me how lucky she is that I’m her boyfriend but at the back of my mind she is not that lucky. I’m a looser and that maybe I need to break our relationship. I already told her that there are rumors floating around about me. She told me that she doesn’t care about that. Well, I was happy to hear that but I cant endure if she is caught up in the situation. I mean if people will mock her the way they are mocking me. I really want to graduate and earn a few money and live somewhere else with her. I want to find a good paying job after I graduate and show my parents how grateful I am for their efforts in sending me to school.
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That's a tough situation. I'd suggest some ideas/things to help you with this if you wanted to try them:
-Wear a promise ring. I don't know if you are a virgin or not, if you are, boom works great for you. If not, get 2 cheap rings and give your girlfriend 1 and tell her and other people that you are promising to take the relationship further once you have the money. That should fend off some people/hassling.
-Maybe carry a picture of your girlfriend around in your wallet/with you to show off?
-Friend/outlets are very important. It seems your parents may be a tough option for you and they already know part of the situation. So I'd suggest you make some friends at school, even if you don't think there would be a commonality/connection between you and certain others immediately. Look for the quieter ones because they usually don't judge or make fun of others from my personal experience. Start a conversation, get to know them and maybe even do activities out of class together with them eventually. Lastly, if you have a church in your area, go to it. You will be able to find a pastor or group of people that won't judge you and will only help you, at minimum they will give you someone to talk to about this.
That's all I can think of for now. Hope this helps.
-Wear a promise ring. I don't know if you are a virgin or not, if you are, boom works great for you. If not, get 2 cheap rings and give your girlfriend 1 and tell her and other people that you are promising to take the relationship further once you have the money. That should fend off some people/hassling.
-Maybe carry a picture of your girlfriend around in your wallet/with you to show off?
-Friend/outlets are very important. It seems your parents may be a tough option for you and they already know part of the situation. So I'd suggest you make some friends at school, even if you don't think there would be a commonality/connection between you and certain others immediately. Look for the quieter ones because they usually don't judge or make fun of others from my personal experience. Start a conversation, get to know them and maybe even do activities out of class together with them eventually. Lastly, if you have a church in your area, go to it. You will be able to find a pastor or group of people that won't judge you and will only help you, at minimum they will give you someone to talk to about this.
That's all I can think of for now. Hope this helps.
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Darkhorse
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You've gotten some good advice; hopefully here's some more:
You sound like you have the right values, but are going through a turbulent time in your life.
My early 20s were not a happy time either, and sometimes they were extremely lonely and depressing. It's not unusual.
Try to keep the connections you have with others (parents, girlfriend, etc.) and look for opportunities to make more. Even casual low-key friendships with others have a beneficial and theraputic effect.
As much as you can, ignore the unkind things people say about you. You cannot please everyone, and some people can't be pleased by anyone.
And keep pursuing your goals. A lot of life (and success in life) is simply putting one foot in front of the other, and not giving up.
You sound like you have the right values, but are going through a turbulent time in your life.
My early 20s were not a happy time either, and sometimes they were extremely lonely and depressing. It's not unusual.
Try to keep the connections you have with others (parents, girlfriend, etc.) and look for opportunities to make more. Even casual low-key friendships with others have a beneficial and theraputic effect.
As much as you can, ignore the unkind things people say about you. You cannot please everyone, and some people can't be pleased by anyone.
And keep pursuing your goals. A lot of life (and success in life) is simply putting one foot in front of the other, and not giving up.
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Thank you very much for the time you spend to give advices. Actually I have the same idea. I was able to save extra cash and I’m buying a couple ring this weekend. Its a present I want to give her in our monthsary this coming Monday. I was thinking that she deserves better but that’s all I am able to give for now. I really want to tell the people around me that i have a girlfriend and that we're doing great but if i do that i may look stupid and i can be accused of being a braggart.
The advices you gave really helped me. I was able to get ideas that i can use.
Some good people in school invited me in their swimming in a resort tomorrow. They are actually good people and that they do not accuse me like most do and i want to be friends with them. I am thinking of going there but they drink and smoke so i tend to back out whenever they ask me. I just say i'll try to go there but when the time comes i actually dont go.
I feel bad that when people mock me and shout things at me when i pass by. There was this instance that a person spit on the road that i was walking. I though its just a coincidence but when i walked back and pass there he did it again and he laughed with his friends. Well, what can i do. I just pretended it did not happen and when i arrived home i put on a smiling face. but i really feel bad about it. people are really becoming wicked.i really hope the end times comes near. Another was someone put a chewing gum on my pants and it messed my pants a lot. and i have to endure the almost-everyday mockery of our neighbor which supposedly are my relatives. mostly at night she shouts out mocking words that pertains to me. she's actually shouting her lungs out. i really hope God will not go against her lungs though. she's actually a christian and their house is a lot bigger that ours. so i guess i will not be respected in any possible angle. All i think is that i should focus on things i'm good at. actually i'm pretty much a lame person. i'm bad at sports and i'm not good at making friends. so when the gossips spread, only few people know me and i think they never made a stand to defend me.
The advices you gave really helped me. I was able to get ideas that i can use.
Some good people in school invited me in their swimming in a resort tomorrow. They are actually good people and that they do not accuse me like most do and i want to be friends with them. I am thinking of going there but they drink and smoke so i tend to back out whenever they ask me. I just say i'll try to go there but when the time comes i actually dont go.
I feel bad that when people mock me and shout things at me when i pass by. There was this instance that a person spit on the road that i was walking. I though its just a coincidence but when i walked back and pass there he did it again and he laughed with his friends. Well, what can i do. I just pretended it did not happen and when i arrived home i put on a smiling face. but i really feel bad about it. people are really becoming wicked.i really hope the end times comes near. Another was someone put a chewing gum on my pants and it messed my pants a lot. and i have to endure the almost-everyday mockery of our neighbor which supposedly are my relatives. mostly at night she shouts out mocking words that pertains to me. she's actually shouting her lungs out. i really hope God will not go against her lungs though. she's actually a christian and their house is a lot bigger that ours. so i guess i will not be respected in any possible angle. All i think is that i should focus on things i'm good at. actually i'm pretty much a lame person. i'm bad at sports and i'm not good at making friends. so when the gossips spread, only few people know me and i think they never made a stand to defend me.
Upvote
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Thank you very much for the time you spend to give advices. Actually I have the same idea. I was able to save extra cash and Im buying a couple ring this weekend. Its a present I want to give her in our monthsary this coming Monday. I was thinking that she deserves better but thats all I am able to give for now. I really want to tell the people around me that i have a girlfriend and that we're doing great but if i do that i may look stupid and i can be accused of being a braggart.
The advices you gave really helped me. I was able to get ideas that i can use.
Some good people in school invited me in their swimming in a resort tomorrow. They are actually good people and that they do not accuse me like most do and i want to be friends with them. I am thinking of going there but they drink and smoke so i tend to back out whenever they ask me. I just say i'll try to go there but when the time comes i actually dont go.
I feel bad that when people mock me and shout things at me when i pass by. There was this instance that a person spit on the road that i was walking. I though its just a coincidence but when i walked back and pass there he did it again and he laughed with his friends. Well, what can i do. I just pretended it did not happen and when i arrived home i put on a smiling face. but i really feel bad about it. people are really becoming wicked.i really hope the end times comes near. Another was someone put a chewing gum on my pants and it messed my pants a lot. and i have to endure the almost-everyday mockery of our neighbor which supposedly are my relatives. mostly at night she shouts out mocking words that pertains to me. she's actually shouting her lungs out. i really hope God will not go against her lungs though. she's actually a christian and their house is a lot bigger that ours. so i guess i will not be respected in any possible angle. All i think is that i should focus on things i'm good at. actually i'm pretty much a lame person. i'm bad at sports and i'm not good at making friends. so when the gossips spread, only few people know me and i think they never made a stand to defend me.
The advices you gave really helped me. I was able to get ideas that i can use.
Some good people in school invited me in their swimming in a resort tomorrow. They are actually good people and that they do not accuse me like most do and i want to be friends with them. I am thinking of going there but they drink and smoke so i tend to back out whenever they ask me. I just say i'll try to go there but when the time comes i actually dont go.
I feel bad that when people mock me and shout things at me when i pass by. There was this instance that a person spit on the road that i was walking. I though its just a coincidence but when i walked back and pass there he did it again and he laughed with his friends. Well, what can i do. I just pretended it did not happen and when i arrived home i put on a smiling face. but i really feel bad about it. people are really becoming wicked.i really hope the end times comes near. Another was someone put a chewing gum on my pants and it messed my pants a lot. and i have to endure the almost-everyday mockery of our neighbor which supposedly are my relatives. mostly at night she shouts out mocking words that pertains to me. she's actually shouting her lungs out. i really hope God will not go against her lungs though. she's actually a christian and their house is a lot bigger that ours. so i guess i will not be respected in any possible angle. All i think is that i should focus on things i'm good at. actually i'm pretty much a lame person. i'm bad at sports and i'm not good at making friends. so when the gossips spread, only few people know me and i think they never made a stand to defend me.
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Ask them if it's ok to go if you don't drink or smoke. Most of my friends drink and smoke but are really nice moralistic people otherwise and don't give me any peer pressure for things like that. See if those guys would do the same.
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I will try my best to make new friends in school. I hope everything goes fine.
Thank you very much. this help me a lot. i really wish i can repay you all. i will certainly include you in my prayers.
Its summer here and classes just ended. I was about to enroll to a summer subject but things happened and i cant. Maybe God doesn't want me to. So i decided to look for a summer job as soon as possible. This will keep me busy and put off my mind from these problems plus i will be earning extra money and i will not be a burden to my parents.
"stay strong man, dont let them pull you down" - someone send me this message and i really appreciate it. It really is different knowing some people actually care for you. I feel encouraged because of you who are spending your time posting here. Since it is difficult to open this kinds of stuffs personally, i find this forum helpful.
Sorry for the very much late reply. I was actually busy in exams, projects and other school requirements.
Everyone pls pray for me, i really need your prayers.Thank you. God bless you and protect you in everything you do.
Thank you very much. this help me a lot. i really wish i can repay you all. i will certainly include you in my prayers.
Its summer here and classes just ended. I was about to enroll to a summer subject but things happened and i cant. Maybe God doesn't want me to. So i decided to look for a summer job as soon as possible. This will keep me busy and put off my mind from these problems plus i will be earning extra money and i will not be a burden to my parents.
"stay strong man, dont let them pull you down" - someone send me this message and i really appreciate it. It really is different knowing some people actually care for you. I feel encouraged because of you who are spending your time posting here. Since it is difficult to open this kinds of stuffs personally, i find this forum helpful.
Sorry for the very much late reply. I was actually busy in exams, projects and other school requirements.
Everyone pls pray for me, i really need your prayers.Thank you. God bless you and protect you in everything you do.
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Mrs. Luther073082
Commit to the LORD whatever you do - Proverbs 16:3
You can go hang out with them and not have to drink or smoke. Maybe your girlfriend could go as well and if things get too weird, you guys could just make an excuse to leave.
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I really cant do anything about my situation. cant i? Last afternoon my neighbor brought some of her school friends and well they had a feast in torturing me through their profane words. They kept on shouting. And Today it happened again. I get this everyday and i'm actually starting to loose all my self worth. Most of the time i get by this things by putting on my earphones and listen to music or watch a movie with an earphones but my earphones just broke so i get to listen to what they say. I asked my mom if she can buy me a cheap new earphones but i have to wait until its her payday. I really hope days will go on faster than it usually does. This time is really not a good day for me. My phone just shut down but that's all right. as long as i can use the computer i can at least go on i think. I really need your prayers.
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I was gonna suggest listening to music through earphones, but it seems you are already there.
Some other ways to drown them out:
-Sing your favorite songs outloud and focus on them as you sing
-Get a pair of earplugs to wear occassionally to drown them out
-Ignore them as best you can. Mostly involves focusing on other things to mentally drown them out(the hardest option to do)
Good luck still. And don't worry too much about it. Remember that the more you think about the something like this, the more it will drive you crazy. Spend your time and thoughts on other things and the impact of these actions should lessen on you over time and become more tolerable.
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Maybe i'm up against my own thoughts. This is really starting to drive me crazy. Thanks. I will certainly buy a pair of earplugs, i really think this will work great. Well, about singing, i really like the song "Still" and "Our God" but i tend to mess up the lyrics that much and i dont have a good voice so i guess i will just try this if im taking a bath. thank you
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Beauty4Ashes
All that I need, is a song in my heart. . .
Praying for you. I was also teased and bullied mercilessly when i was younger so I understand your pain. People can be cruel for no apparent reason.
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Darkhorse
just horsing around
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Singing is great. Don't worry about your voice; singing is for you, not for others.
Me too, on both counts. Praying also. Meanwhile, check out the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5 - 7).
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Mrs. Luther073082
Commit to the LORD whatever you do - Proverbs 16:3
Were they shouting at you specifically or just being generally annoying as college kids can be? Are you living on campus or off campus in an apartment?
If you are living off campus, I'd call the police.
If you are living off campus, I'd call the police.
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Thank you very much for these chapters. these lightened my spirit up. These really helped. thank you so much.
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Thank you very much. i really needed prayers and i will certainly include you in my prayers too. At first i did not pay much attention to what they do but as time goes by it piles up to weigh me down. I'm a bit depressed and sometimes i have trouble sleeping. Now, i really know the value of peace of mind.
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