I Have Autism

[BlueLioness]

Yeah, I have Autism and I was worried that I wouldnt be able to get a date because of that. I was beginning to belittle myself and think that no guy wants a special needs girl.



So disprove me if I'm wrong and there's actually is a boy out there who wouldn't care if he went out with an autistic girl...

 

[Sabertooth]

Aspergers is still in the gene pool, so at least one has gotten a date...!

If God has called you to marriage, allow Him to develop you into "wife" material. Being a spouse, with all of its joys, is a great responsibility. We guys need[ed] to let God make us into "husband" material, too.

When I was single, I gave up on looking. I let God work on me and let Him decide how I would ultimately connect with a "wife." Though we hung out a lot before marriage, we didn't have an actual date until after we were married.

 

[dayhiker]

I think you just need to learn about yourself and how to work with your strengths and you'll be fine.

 

[Rachel96]

Well, I'm a girl... but if I met a nice Christian guy who wanted to date me (especially now I'm getting older, I'm 17 and thinking that I'll want to start courting/dating in the next few years maybe), I wouldn't care if he were autistic or not.

Actually, that's probably not true. The truth is, I'd probably PREFER for my future husband to be autistic/Asperger's. The thought of having to share the rest of my life with an NT sort of freaks me out...

So, I can't really speak for any guys out there. But I would hope that they'd be more concerned with who you are as a person, rather than whether you happen to have ASD. But then, I don't think ASD is a "disability" or a "special need"...

 

[Sabertooth]

I am an Aspie who is married to an NT (but she has other problems). She actually liked my Aspie ways (until she got depression) and was a complement to my weaknesses. The NT/Aspie thing can work, but any mate has to like you as you are, Aspie, NT or anything in between.

 

[Rachel96]

I agree, Sabertooth. It's more important for your future spouse to love/like you as a PERSON rather than as a dx. To be honest, I really don't care, provided my future husband loves me and loves God. That's all that matters, and I hope that that is what any NT person would say, too.

 

[Sabertooth]

Also, it is really important that you meet in person, before you commit to a long-term relationship. And I say that as a tech-savvy person.

There is an important element of "chemistry" that can't be detected in a photo, video, chat room or through emails. Once you "hit it off" in person, then all of those other things are beneficial.

I remember (as a single person), meeting women/girls that I would end up crushing on that I wouldn't have been interested in, if I just had their photo first. There were others where the reverse was true. I would just not connect with them no matter how attractive I found them to be. They weren't necessarily good or bad people. The chemistry was either there or it wasn't. (I, personally, believe that Aspergers randomly intensifies our pheromonal sensitivity like it does our other senses...)

One caveat, though: an intense pheromonal attraction, alone, doesn't replace their need to pass other simple tests, like loving God, having a compatible life-plan, etc. That is what makes courting such a painful proposition. That you can be so intensely attracted to someone and find out, too late, that they hate your God. That is why, no matter how compellingly attractive I found her to be, I would not go on a single date (when single) with someone who was not clearly a believer.

Oh, and welcome to Christian Forums...