I got called fat...

[NewCreation517]

I went in to visit a friend of mine (a man I used to take care of at the nursing home) and he said "Have you put on some weight?". I pulled it off well... smiling and acting like it didn't bother me at all. But, when I left the nursing home I felt like bawling. "Look at what I've allowed to happen to me!" is what I was thinking. But then I felt even worse realizing that the other people I had visited that day were either dying or unable to take care of themselves. Why do I worry about such trivial things? If I'm not of this world... why do I act so much like I am??

Sorry... just needed to get all that out.

God Bless,
Hayley

 

[PureGrace]

I'm so sorry Hayley. It may sound like something so trivial but to girls, I can be such a big deal (this I definately know). Looking at your picture, I can tell you that you are NOT fat. Just remember that you are God's lovely creation and nothing anyone can say will make that change.



Kate

 

[~Beauty_from_Pain~]

And I don't think that you are fat either.

GB.

Starling2003

 

[Surrender2Win]

I went in to visit a friend of mine (a man I used to take care of at the nursing home) and he said "Have you put on some weight?". I pulled it off well... smiling and acting like it didn't bother me at all. But, when I left the nursing home I felt like bawling. "Look at what I've allowed to happen to me!" is what I was thinking. But then I felt even worse realizing that the other people I had visited that day were either dying or unable to take care of themselves. Why do I worry about such trivial things? If I'm not of this world... why do I act so much like I am??

Sorry... just needed to get all that out.

God Bless,
Hayley

Hi Hayley,

I hear what your saying, and understand the feelings that you are having. I would like to point something out though, you said that you got called fat, however the way you describe him talking to you, he asked if you had put on weight...now I know that statement said to someone who has eating issues can in a way be the same as calling them fat, I used to have the same reactions as you in similar situations and felt like they were calling me fat. But our thinking is distorted, it could have been his way of saying, you look so much better, I was worried about you, you were way to thin...lots of people don't really know how to handle these situations, and so they say things that really mean well...but sound very insensitive, and they have no idea the damage it does when they say these things...and it's not their fault, because they really don't know. The one thing we have to learn is to be able to put those comments aside and keep going and don't focus on them and what they say, focus on your goal for recovery. People are going to say things, people are going to mention things about how you look if you lost a lot of weight, and then gain some back...it does not mean that you are fat, what it means is that they notice you, and more then likely if they notice you and comment on it, then they care about you also, and care for your well being...at least that has been my experience.

 

[flyingsum0]

I can remeber visiting my Grandmother in the nursing home. It seemed liek everytime I lost some weight she would ask me if I had gained weight and everytime gained weight she would compliment me on losing weight. Just like you I pretended that it didnt bother me but it did.

You have my prayers

 

[BlackRain]

 

[Apples of Gold]

Hi Hayley,

I hear what your saying, and understand the feelings that you are having. I would like to point something out though, you said that you got called fat, however the way you describe him talking to you, he asked if you had put on weight...now I know that statement said to someone who has eating issues can in a way be the same as calling them fat, I used to have the same reactions as you in similar situations and felt like they were calling me fat. But our thinking is distorted, it could have been his way of saying, you look so much better, I was worried about you, you were way to thin...lots of people don't really know how to handle these situations, and so they say things that really mean well...but sound very insensitive, and they have no idea the damage it does when they say these things...and it's not their fault, because they really don't know. The one thing we have to learn is to be able to put those comments aside and keep going and don't focus on them and what they say, focus on your goal for recovery. People are going to say things, people are going to mention things about how you look if you lost a lot of weight, and then gain some back...it does not mean that you are fat, what it means is that they notice you, and more then likely if they notice you and comment on it, then they care about you also, and care for your well being...at least that has been my experience.

Hayley~ You are so cute!

I really agree with the advice by Amanda.

People are way more willing to tell someone that they are overweight than underweight. It's a stigma that we put off I guess....... Take it as a complement that you look better now than the last time they seen you.

Hang in there. I'm ing for you!