i dont want to live anymore

[knw1991]

theres no purpose for me, im just taking up oxygen that can be used by someone else.

my heart cant take anymore pain, i try to hold on each day but i dont want to fight anymore

 

[knw1991]

My mom can't afford to pay for my funeral I don't want to put her in a financial crisis, why can't I just vanish into thin air, God can get me out the way and give life back to someone else that deserves to be alive

 

[.Mikha'el.]

Still praying for you. I repped you a short time ago to try to encourage you.

 

[NumberOfStars]

There IS a purpose for you, don't listen to the enemy's lies. I know it's hard, and I'm so sorry you have to go through this. You have been showing so much strength and courage by continuing through this hard time. God is with you right now and he will never leave, lean on him. I'm praying for you right now.

 

[knw1991]

Still praying for you. I repped you a short time ago to try to encourage you.

Thank you, I'm sorry I don't know what repping is
Thank you for thinking of me

 

[.Mikha'el.]

Thank you, I'm sorry I don't know what repping is
Thank you for thinking of me

Oh ok. You can access the "reputation" comments others leave you in your control panel.

 

[knw1991]

There IS a purpose for you, don't listen to the enemy's lies. I know it's hard, and I'm so sorry you have to go through this. You have been showing so much strength and courage by continuing through this hard time. God is with you right now and he will never leave, lean on him. I'm praying for you right now.

Thank you for your kind words and encouragement,imjust full of doubt, I prayed through the day but I can't bring myself to believe God is with me, if he was i wouldnt feel hopeless
I just get a mental block about God loving me or being there
I can't stop thinking about how my father and that guy left me in pain Ill never feel loved by God or never have a future husband. Is it possible that God made me worthless compared to the human race.Why is it that I can't accept that God may not be interested or care about my life at all? Maybe I did or said something in my past to block God. One time I told him to go away forever maybe he's repaying me for how rebellious and evil I was

 

[NumberOfStars]

Thank you for your kind words and encouragement,imjust full of doubt, I orated through the day but I can't bring myself to believe God is with me, if he was i wouldnt feel hopeless
I just get a mental block about God loving me or being there
I can't stop thinking about how my father and that guy left me in pain Ill never feel loved by God or never have a future husband. Is it possible that God made me worthless compared to the human race.Why is it that I can't accept that God may not be interested or care about my life at all? Maybe I did or said something in my past to block God. One time I told him to go away forever maybe he's repaying me for how rebellious and evil I was

Yeah it can definitely be hard to see God's love and know he is with you when you are in the midst of such pain and heartache. You are NOT worthless, Jesus gave his life for you- that is how special and precious you are. He is not repaying you, he would never do that. I was in the same situation and got so angry at God that I turned away from him for a while. He forgave me for that. Nothing you do could ever be bad enough to make him turn away. He loves you way too much for that.

 

[droidBebe]

theres no purpose for me, im just taking up oxygen that can be used by someone else.

my heart cant take anymore pain, i try to hold on each day but i dont want to fight anymore

I've felt EXaCTLy the same way before.

Give yourself some time.

Sometimes when I feel like that and if I think I will harm myself, I give myself a kind of grace period...a few hours or a day or whatever.

Then I look back and I can see how strong I have been. I can see that, even though I thought I couldn't go on anymore, I have more endurance than I thought.

 

[knw1991]

Thank you everyone for commenting and comforting me through this time it showed me that I don't have to go through this alone

 

[Spunkn]

Keeping fighting with us, you will make it

 

[knw1991]

I feel like giving up, I can't bring my mind to believe God is there

 

[knw1991]

Keeping fighting with us, you will make it

But staying alive won't change my beliefs I'll still feel the same way

 

[bluemarkus]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JGqkiiizU0

you now will go through the waters who will divide themselves by the ruakh, mighty wind of g-d. afterwards you will be on a new continent and have a new life. old things are past. old thinking is past. old habits are past. old expectations, patterns of doing things, are past. you are on new ground. like the ancient israelites did when they left egypt behind and went through the waters where todays gordon reef is located...

just because u slept with a dirty old creep with lots of money, had abusive parents or went to the wrong school or get bullied by a pack of a--holes dont mean youre a hopeless case. there is no hopeless case. good luck with your new life.

 

[knw1991]

Thanks

 

[knw1991]

i decided to renounce whatever faith i had left. the bible says that God chose some to spend eternal life with him and others as objects of his wrath. I was made for his wrath, i've accepted my destiny. i'll try to make the best of this life and accept my fate. i wish everyone the best here and thank you for your help and prayers. im thankful to have people who care. Goodbye everyone

 

[Spunkn]

You were not made for His wrath, you were made for His love.

I'm on Skype if you want to talk

 

[knw1991]

You were not made for His wrath, you were made for His love.

I'm on Skype if you want to talk

thank you

 

[knw1991]

i feel so tired i dont know if its emotional exhaustion and physical. every minute seems unbearable. how do i hold on? how can i make myself believe God is there and He cares?

 

[WithLoveFromAlyssa]

Hey, Lets be friends....